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Sunday Fiction. Labour's new Hotstuff

by Whaleoil on March 7, 2010

Just had a call from Barnsely Bill having his morning coffee, due to his Crippling Laziness Syndrome, he has ordered that I blog this.

He happened to look down at the cover of this weeks Sunday News and on the cover is a photo of “Socialist Cindy” Ardern with the tag “Labour’s new Hotstuff” above it. His first reaction was that they put the wrong photo below the headline, his second reaction was to go straight to the racing pages.

Clearly the sub-editor shortage at the Sunday News has reached catastrophic levels because the article about “My Little Pony” was in the Lifestyle section rather than the Racing “New Fillies” section.

Labour' new hotstuff: Jacinda Ardern

Labour's new hotstuff: Jacinda Ardern

And for completely stupid statement of the year we can look no further than the very same article and a comment from Grant Robertson.

Good friend and fellow Labour MP Grant Robertson shared an office with Adern [sic] through the “extraordinarily stressful” 2005 election year, when they were both advisors to Clark.

He says Adern [sic] defies her age.

“I think she’s made a great beginning. I’d like to think Jacinda will be a cabinet minister in fairly short order.”

Uhhmmm….Grant, sweetie, dear…..you have to be in government for that to happen, so either you are utterly deluded or “Socialist Cindy” is going to jump ship or should that be a hurdle.

On another note the Sunday News notes she was voted the third sexiest MP, but fails to note that Nikki Kaye came in first and Melissa Lee second. So poor old My Little Pony only ran third, off to the knackers yard for her if she keeps up this form.

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  • garry

    Should the pic be of the other end of the nag, perhaps

    G

  • jabba

    I thought she had brown hair??

  • garry

    If Jacinda Arden becomes a cabinet minister (or Jami lee Ross for that matter if he graduates to National level (which im sure he will) then we are in serious trouble.

    The trouble with “young guns” (description courtesy of Paul Henry on the Breakfast show TVNZ) – is they are sycophants and pursuers of the populist line of the first degree. They smile – they wave – they look young and ‘onto it’ and we all buy into it…. at our peril. Prostitution and politics are bedfellows in my view – same thing – different name … existing without visible means of support.

    If i could find a voodoo spell to resurrect R D Muldoon / Keith Jacka Holyoake / Michael Joseph Savage / John A Lee and others – i would. Those guys would show these wet behind the ears horses asses the ropes. At least they had charisma and guts whatever you thought about their politics.

    These young guns are little pampered inexperienced private school types (that may not be true – but i thought it sounded really cool) who would probably be the template for the spotty faced adolescents who work in Treasure and the Reserve Bank – determining normal peoples future.

    Does anyone want that pampered prissy little chick determining anything at least till she turns 50 and is off the obsessions with “my little pony” and dressups.

    Im trying to fit in with the idiom of blog guys – so im getting daring with my language. Indulge me.

    But this is my opinion. Watch Jacinda on TV One each morning with some National guy with a speech impediment (cant remember his name except he was elected and Jacinda wasnt) – the speech impediment is that he sounds like an unpopular stuckup school prefect when he speaks.

    Phew – thats enough for now i feel lightheaded

    G

    cheers
    G

  • jabba

    I think you mean (lawyer) Simon Bridges .. MP for Tauranga who saw off Winston. He is keen, as are all the young ones, and could be a good Ministers in a few years.
    Jacinda gives me the shits to be honest as she has this know all look about her. She is another my (Labours) way or the highway type.
    People give Key a hard time for so called flip flops. I consider a person capable of admitting they were wrong, or on the wrong path, and changing their minds as being strong. Clark NEVER admitted being wrong at anything and many of her followers left behind are the same.
    The sooner Jacinda stops shaking her head with the stupid smile on her face every time Simon, or anyone else speaks, the better (for her).

  • garry

    Gidday jabba – i think Winston saw himself off (and i admire him) unfortunately …price of prostitution i guess. So it doesnt particularly to me, endorse Simon Bridges.

    Im in my mid to late 50′s mate – so all youngsters give me the shits.

    Im just jealous i think.

    Key – i voted for that man and i thought he was going to make a difference – my view – he is still a merchant banker.

    I dont honestly see Key admitting he is wrong – i see him charm offensiving but still manifesting many of the same traits as clark. Listen to what he says – and see how much substance is there. At his level – that economic forum should have been a world beater – instead it was a corporate circle-jerk for the media.

    Just like Fay and Richwhite – in the end they are paper people – not people who have produced real things for real people with real downstream benefits. “The merchant banker and rapacious asset stripper giveth and the merchant banker and rapacious asset stripper taketh away – this is the word of the lord…” I could go on about ashes to ashes etc – but thats taking the analogy too far perhaps. its a burial service for NZ – and it comes to its conclusion next year. Hope we can all afford to pay for the funeral. When people like Ron Brierly (and i now make the sign to ward off the evil eye) who stripped some of NZ’s oldest and most venerable companies – gets a knighthood … pffft … its sickening.

    The emperors new clothes dont exist – he is naked and we are all duped into believing this thing to quote (I think) isaiah “that this doing is marvellous in our eyes…”

    Absolute poppycock – key doesnt flip flop – he flim flams his way and only looks good because there is no real challenger to make people see how ineffective and vacuous he really is. The day Paul Henry (who is an avowed National Man) gives Key some stick on his morning programme is the day i believe that we have matured beyond a beauty contest in our political landscape. Its like my ex mother in law who I think shared a brain with one of the teletubbies …. “why did you vote for him mother … answer … i thought he looked a nice man…”

    Not ripping into you or your view jabba – just sounding off indiscriminately – which i know well – i will probably come to regret.

    Cheers
    G

  • garry

    And if simple simon is a lawyer jabba – that makes him worse … uggh – a scumsucking bottom dweller.

    Ive met some nice lawyers “smile and charge” is their motto – and man do they know how to charge for navigating a silly and nonsensical system designed to confound, dismay and destroy. They are the high priests of a system that is more difficult for the ordinary person to access than stealing the sacrificial goat from your nearest masonic lodge.

    Benevolent dictatorship may be the answer – Seig Heil

    Joke – did you hear about the dyslexic satanist … he sold his soul to Santa

    cheers
    G

  • Lion King

    When I saw that picture I thought it was a picture of Keys doing his Flip Flops again

    • http://whaleoil.gotcha.co.nz Whaleoil

      Lion Queen, That would be funny if only you could get John Key’s name right, you idiot

  • Ken Shock

    That pic reminds me of Obama … !

  • The Gantt Guy

    Hell, if Socialist Cindy is the future of the Liarbore party, then National should be safe on the treasury benches for decades. Her job in the house is to sit behind Tiger and grin like a fucking idiot (which she is) whenever someone from Liarbore opens their trap. Apart from that, her other job is to go on breakfast TV once a week and make Simon Bridges look smarter than he already is. She’s never had a real job and thus never contributed to New Zealand in a positive way. She is the former leader of the International Union of Socialist Youth. ffs, that alone should preclude her from being in parliament, as she is obviously delusional and separated from reality!

    Her one claim to fame is when the lovely Ali Mau gave her a right fisking (and not in a good way) on Breakfast (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WB2szjjZ8rA). Comedy gold!

  • Andi

    Ha! Had to laugh when I saw the latest pic of Labour’s Young Gum *scum hugger* Jacinda Ardern you’ve posted on here (nice big smile on her face as per). God I can’t stand that uppity horse faced mole. Loves the sound of her own voice. *shudders*

  • jabba

    gee (haha) Ali Mau went straight for the jugular didn’t she .. Jacinda obviously doesn’t do it for her

  • kate

    Just out of interest could one of you please tell me what your criteria is for a ‘real job’?

    I have worked in the private sector, the public sector and the education sector. I’m not exactly sure what you think civil servants do, but I have never worked harder than when I was working on a Government bill in the civil service. I was working considerably longer hours than many of my friends in the private sector (and for less money) in a high pressure and stressful environment, but I was doing something that would make a difference. Working as a civil servant also gave me a much better & broader knowledge of various industry sectors & economics than my private sector work, which had a far narrower focus.

    Regardless of the Government in power – right wing or left wing – civil servants are needed to carry out the actual work that goes on behind the Government’s policy making and leadership. Without civil servants none of the Governments visions would be implemented as there would be no-one to do the work or to provide the evidence that gets used as part of the legislative and policy making process.

    And yes, of course there’s a debate to be had on how the civil service is structured and how many civil servants you need, but that’s a separate issue from baselessly dismissing any civil service job as being ‘not a real job’. Do any of you actually know what Jacinda’s jobs have entailed? If you had any evidence that it involved sitting on her arse getting fat off tax payers money, then you might have a legitimate point about her qualifications (or lack of). As it stands a lot of the posts on this blog seem less interested with politics and facts and more interested in venting petty (and pointless) personal insults about completely superficial issues. Is this really the level of political debate you can muster on here?