Clown bows out crying a river of tears

Last night the Clown of Campbells Bay had his last urgent council meeting, turning up wearing his gown and chains…and the the reason for the urgent meeting just days before North Shore City ceases to exist…a one hour Powerpoint presentation about Andrew Williams, complete with a Len Brown like break down and a river of tears to end it all.

Andrew Williams, the Clown of Campbells Bay crying a river of tears

Andrew Williams, the Clown of Campbells Bay crying a river of tears

Today Auckland supermayor-elect Len Brown unveils his new look council – last night outgoing North Shore mayor Andrew Williams broke down in tears as he bowed out.

Following a string of colourful headlines Williams was unsuccessful in being elected to the new Auckland super-city council, either as mayor or as a councillor, during the recent local body elections.

He secured less than 1 per cent of the mayoral vote.

Last night Williams, elected mayor in 2007, called a final North Shore City Council meeting.

Williams entered the council chamber adorned in his mayoral gown and chains. He gave a one hour slideshow presentation showing photographs of himself amongst a range of council-funded initiatives, including parks and roads.

To explain “why I actually became mayor” Williams began his presentation by showing a photograph taken in 1991 of him kneeling next to a “dangerous” childrens’ swing in Campbells Bay which he called on the then-council to remedy.

At the conclusion of Williams’ address he broke down in tears when trying to thank mayoress Jane Williams.

“Just in final closing I would like to thank Jane,” he began.

“I just ah, I just, I just would like to say that I couldn’t have done it without you,” Williams told his wife who was sitting with the couple’s children in the public gallery.

“What people often don’t realise is that a mayor does very much rely on his mayoress. She is my mentor, she talks things through with me, she gives me advice, what I shouldn’t be doing and I am often reprimanded by her for various things.

“It is a huge commitment and Jane has made a huge commitment in the last three years. So many events, so many functions. She has always been there.”

I note that he didn’t thank the owners of GPK and other Takapuna bars who enjoyed his extensive patronage, he didn’t thank his CEO and City Secretarty fro running interference in the face of extensive LGOIMA requests, he didn’t thanks Les Patterson the head of North Shore Police for running investigations against his political enemies, he dodn’t thank the council staff that would have had to clean up the smelly leavings of his night time wanderings, and lastly he didn’t thank me for helping him find a new job.

The meeting was really so Andrew Williams could be patted ont he back by all the A-Team, a team I might add that pretty much got smashed to pieces in the local body elections, none more so than the Clown himself. The fact that the previous Mayor George Wood was elected to the new council and Andrew Williams was elected to nothinq says it all.

Now why doesn’t he just fuck off to Taupo like he promised. But keep watching here because the word is that Andrew Williams is going to be back, this time in national politics after having a secured a deal along with three other ex-mayors to stand for NZ First. You heard it here first. If he stands I’ll smash him up there as well and will delight in doing it.

  • strykerman1

    Can I please dedicate one last song to Andrew Williams.

    (Swap ‘She’ to ‘Williams’ in the lyrics)

  • buffalobob

    Good work Whale, I am happy that this twat is gone. He is obviously an attention whore, and self loving homo., who needed to be shut up. Props.

  • gaskranken

    So the clown is off to cloud cuckoo land for the duration hopefully, never to be heard from again until they need a pissed hobbit in the bar scene.

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