I hope eel be alright:
A man sought emergency treatment at hospital in Auckland this week with an eel stuck up his bottom.
The unnamed individual presented himself at the A&E department at Auckland City Hospital to explain his embarrassing problem.
It is believed the patient was sent for X-rays and a scan, which showed there was an eel lodged inside him.
“The eel was about the size of a decent sprig of asparagus and the incident is the talk of the place,” a hospital source said. “Doctors and nurses have come across people with strange objects that have got stuck where they shouldn’t be before, but an eel has to be a first.”
It is unclear how the eel managed to be trapped inside the man. It is believed medics successfully removed it and the man was later discharged.
A hospital spokesman last night confirmed the bizarre incident had taken place.
“In response to a direct query from the Herald on Sunday, we can confirm that an adult male presented at Auckland City Hospital this week with an eel inside him,” Matt Rogers, spokesman for Auckland District Health Board, said.
Pity there isn’t a photo we can caption…oh well nevermind, we can pretend there is:
“I was taking a crap in my fishtank, and all of a sudden…”
NZ unanimously declares EelMan to be an Australian forthwith
One man and his eel means months of carefully planned 100% Middle Earth advertising for NZ is wrecked. On the bonus side, hordes of German and Dutch men book tickets to NZ to explore eeling.
NZ’s entrant in the global arse-fishing contest has been found
Matt Watson from ITM Fishing declares “game over, you win”
“Rectum? Damn near killed him”





