Latest Oscar Pistorius joke collection

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Further to my post yesterday on jokes about Oscar Pistorius I have sourced the latest ones for your viewing pleasure:

Oscar Pistorius has said he won’t be entering any further races.
I think he has to worry more about different races entering him, once he’s in prison.

Oscar Pistorius has murdered his girlfriend.
Proof that even a man with no legs has a better shot than Fernando Torres.

Oscar Pistorius. Not the first South African with a race problem.

I’m struggling to find any of my usual porn.
Now when I google “fucked African amputee” all I get is stories about Oscar Pistorius.

Well I guess we should count ourselves lucky Oscar Pistorius was competing in the men’s 400m at the Olympics, and not starting it. 

Oscar Pistorius has an incredible record of wins to his name.
Six gold medals, four silver medals and one argument.

Things aren’t that bad, Oscar Pistorius.
He has the court’s best car parking space.

It’s hard not to envy Oscar Pistorius’s girlfriend.
I’ve never seen anyone receive so many flowers on valentines day.

What do you call a room full of dead people?
An Oscar Pistorius surprise birthday party.

As well as losing his legs it seems Oscar Pistorius also lost the ability to shout…
“Hey Reeva is that you in the bathroom having a shit?”

Oscar Pistorius’ favourite band has always been ‘Bullet For My Valentine’

If Oscar Pistorius had been Macauley Culkin, Home Alone would have been a much shorter film.

Looks as though Arsene Wenger might be looking to Oscar Pistorius in the Summer transfer window after reports claimed he had more shots on target in 9 seconds than Arsenal did in 90 minutes against Bayern Munich

What’s the difference between Oscar Pistorius and myself?

Well for one, I’ve never had a shot at an FHM model

Lots of men make big romantic gestures on Valentine’s Day.
Take Oscar Pistorius, for example.
His girlfriend was completely blown away.

Oscar Pistorius:
1 bloody cricket bat
2 stumps
No bail

 

If you missed it, you may also want to check out this morning’s Oscar Pistorius Cartoons.

  • dave

    Apparently the argument between Pistorius and his girlfriend was over something extremely petty… He wanted a new bathroom door but she was dead against it!!!

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