Craig Foss

From Craig Foss about Labour’s “Not Working for Families”

Good grief the Drunken Sailor is on a huge bender. Another $2.6b of labour borrowing to pay people not to work announced yesterday.

November 8, 2011 8:51 am via Twitter for iPhoneReplyRetweetFavorite

@CraigFossMP

Craig Foss

With all the fuss at the moment about GAY number plates it is pleasing to see that Ford have released the new version of the Ranger.

Perhaps Fossy could kill two birds with one stone and get a new gay ute and a GAY number plate at the same time.

Back at the last election David Farrar and I trundled around the country in the Blogmobile.

On one of our stops we interviewed Craig Foss, before he had a gay ute. Some of the things he said three years ago have some relevance now.

On the question of Goff or Cunliffe he replied “Goff, although I’d see Shane Jones sneaking through the undergrowth and coming up the side”

I would never have thought that Ford could make a gayer ute than their current gay ute, but they have really excelled themselves this time.

Ford have announced that they have really camped up the gay ute and made and even gayer one.

Let me re-write their information for them:

Ford NZ is going gay at this year’s Fieldays show with the much-anticipated New Zealand debut of the new Ranger Wildtrak gay ute.

Designed and developed in Australia the Wildtrak sits on gayed out 18-inch wheels and comes with a roof rack and gay sports hoop to beefcake up its profile. There is also special badging and gay graphics to set it apart from lesser models. Inside, there are leather/cloth sports seats and 23 different storage spaces including a glovebox which can fit a laptop computer and a deep centre bin which can keep six cans of mineral water cool.

Apparently, the Wildtrak can mince through water up to 31.5-inches deep and has just over nine inches of ground clearance. It also has a towing capability of up to 3350kg.

In terms of powerplants the Wildtrak has an option of two engines. A new weak pussy -ass 2.2-litre four-cylinder diesel that delivers peak torque output of 375 Nm and power output of 110kW, or a new metro-sexual 3.2-litre 5-cylinder diesel that produces a powerful 470 Nm of torque and is power rated at 147kW. The Wildtrak is fitted with an 80-litre fuel tank so expect one of the longest ranges in the segment.

Alongside the new Ranger Wildtrak on Ford’s show stand will be the new Territory Titanium, the metro-sexual gay ute of the city folk, new Mondeo Titanium, new AB Falcon XR6 and the current model Ranger. Ford is also pushing its connection with the All Blacks and will have two All Blacks players on-site on Friday the 17th of June from 1-3pm for photos with the fans.

Maybe the Hon. Craig Foss will get an even gayer ute to celebrate his new ministerial post.

David Farrar is speculating whether or not ACT will keep the ministerial portfolios it currently holds. He clearly has a good source for his speculation, I wonder whether or not the sacks of gold bullion have been delivered to his private vault in Switzerland yet?

My sources in both National and ACT also conform this to be accurate. My understanding is that ACT will take the high moral ground and claim that, contrary to Farrar’s speculation it actually isn’t about salary, perks and baubles, it is abour stable government and principles.

Speculation should now turn to who in National will score Ministerial jobs.

The tipline tells me that Craig Foss is a definite for a portfolio, even though he has a gay ute,  and there is the possibility that his Hawkes Bay mate Chris Tremain is also in the picture for a job.

from Facebook

Proof positive that Craig Foss has a gay ute.

Craig Foss’ gay ute has competition.

By now everyone knows that Craig Foss has a gay ute.

Ever the helpful blogger I think I have a solution for Craig Foss so he can man up.

Hopefully he will be able to find the money to buy Sandra Goudie’s non-gay V8 Ford Falcon 500 now she is retiring and save Hastings from being embarrassed by an MP with a gay ute.

Sandra Goudie's manly V8 Ford Falcon 500

Still, at least it isn’t as gay as Lord Burns’ of Marlborough’s love bug.

Iain Lees-Galloway has been stirring shit. So much shit that the normally placid Manawatu Standard has got its knickers in a twist over a $30 per head breakfast in Palmerston North featuring Craig Foss as a guest speaker.

Who?

Well precisely. Farrar, Barnsley and I were joking that Iain Lees-Galloway was complaining about an MP speaking about the budget like it was all some sort of conspiracy and that Craig Foss probably isn’t even on the committee that gets to choose the font for the budget documents, or the stoock photos to accompany it.

This is just another Labour attempt to get a smear on. Well Mr Lees-Galloway if you want to go smearing then you should really have your own house in order. you see Iain Lees-Galloway is a rooter, a serial rooter, not as good as The Mangrove, but a rooter nonetheless.

I mean having a poor Hansard stenographer in tears after shagging her silly for months by telling her that in a choice between her or the missus, the missus was the one. She just wanted to know where she stood and you had to let her know it was “stood up”.

Let’s not forget the persistant rumours of your participation in the great 2008 Press Gallery booze heist. From what I hear Lees-Galloway is just lucky one of Phil’s staffers took one for the team.

Now stop your silly nonsense or you’ll get a harder slap.