humour

Let’s play the CNN porn game

cnn

This week CNN accidentally aired  30 minutes of hard core, transsexual porn. Some would say that it’s the first real news CNN has aired in years but what is even funnier is the name of the show that was supposed to be playing that the porn replaced for half an hour. The show was called…
drum-roll-please-2
wait for it…

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Unwritten car parking rules of New Zealand

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Yesterday I was giving my daughter yet another driving lesson and after an encounter in the undercover Countdown carpark she told me that I should write a post about the unwritten car parking rules of New Zealand. My unwritten rules may be different to your unwritten rules but I think it is time to open the discussion because some of you insist on breaking them!

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Male feminist doesn’t get the point of #Meninist

Another reason to buy from My Food Bag

I do like a company with a sense of humour.

screenshot-whaleoil.co.nz

screenshot-whaleoil.co.nz

It reminds me of this….

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An unknown mental illness is believed responsible for a series of violent incidents

You may have noticed that mental health has been in the media a lot lately.  Globally there has been incident after incident where previously seemingly healthy men have suffered  inexplicable nervous breakdowns. This mysterious epidemic of mental or psychiatric illnesses has left researchers struggling to find a common cause or factor. So far experts remain baffled.

Homophobicus orlanditis: In this disturbing case, a young man from an ethnically diverse and culturally rich background that coincidentally has strong traditional taboos against such modern practices as man on man copulation or woman on woman coupling and yet who exhibited no previous symptoms of any mental disorder whatsoever mysteriously suffered an acute breakdown of his nervous system (or homophobicus orlanditis), when he found himself inexplicably confronted by a tutu-wearing group of cavorting drag queens in a “gays only” nightclub in an American tourist resort. Symptoms of the mysterious breakdown included loudly and repetitively shouting out guttural slogans with strong flat vowel sounds whilst expressing his neurological disturbances via the means of shooting everybody dead. Diagnosis: Unknown mental illness.

Catholicus intoleranza: In this extremely rare case, a young man and his associate, both from ethnically diverse and culturally rich heritages that coincidentally hold strong traditional taboos against the faith-expression practices of so-called “non-believers” and yet who exhibited no previous symptoms of any mental disorders mysteriously suffered an acute and simultaneous breakdown of their nervous systems (suspected catholicus intoleranza) when they found themselves accidentally confronted by one old priest and two nuns swinging a bowl of incense in front of their faces in a French medieval town. Symptoms of this unusual twinned nervous breakdown include both individuals simultaneously breaking into guttural verbal manifestations with unusual linguistic quirks whilst displaying signs of acute psychological disturbances via the means of slitting the priest’s throat. Diagnosis: Unknown mental illness.

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New Zealand media headline of the day

screenshot-whaleoil.co.nz

screenshot-whaleoil.co.nz

Screenshot-whaleoil.co.nz

Screenshot-whaleoil.co.nz

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Headline of the week

screenshot-Whaleoil.co.nz

screenshot-Whaleoil.co.nz

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Fundraising ideas for Labour, let’s help a comrade out

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Let’s face it, when it comes to fundraising the Labour party lack entrepreneurship  almost as badly as they lack funds. In an insincere gesture of cross-party cooperation I thought we could put our collective heads together to help our Labour Party comrades out.

I have a few product suggestions which I hope you will all add to in the comments.

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Bad translation fun

It is great how easy it is to get text translated these days. Unfortunately it doesn’t always translate perfectly but fortunately it can often be hilarious.

Below is the result of translating the above sentence in and out of English a few times using google translate.

During these days, how easy it is to get the text from a great present. Until the case is not a complete success can often hilarious

I don’t know how the below signs were translated but the end results are very enjoyable.

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Ever wondered if you are an Aspie?

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We  joke about Asperger’s syndrome in our family.  None of us have ever been diagnosed as being an Aspie but we certainly recognise a few Aspie qualities in the way that we interact and do things. Both Cameron and my son have  encyclopaedia-like memories. Cameron’s specialty is history and politics and his general knowledge is incredible.

I read recently that Aspie women are better at hiding their Aspie qualities from others. Apparently, they are better at pretending to be “normal” than the guys.

A wicked sense of humour is also, I believe, a common Aspie trait so here is a set of fun questions to find out if you too belong to the weird and wonderful world of the Aspie. I recognise myself and members of my family in quite a few.

NOTE: This is not a diagnostic tool – it is a bit of fun.

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