Michael Wood

Behold – 28 loons challenge MUNZ for King Idiot status.

Well well well, three holes in the ground, what do we have here by a press release co-signed by 28 left wing local board loons of Auckland.

Just when we thought that MUNZ had a monopoly on self-immolating stupidity, the Auckland political left rises up to challenge for King Idiot status.

“In an unprecedented move, 28 Auckland Local Board members from 10 different Boards are uniting to call for Ports of Auckland to return to good faith bargaining and drop plans to outsource jobs at the port.”

The idiots are:

Shale Chambers (Goff mate)
Michael Woods (Goff mate and penis lolly defeatist)
Denise Roche (now a Green MP, hopelessly conflicted in her political hat wearing, shouldn’t she have resigned – November 27 was 7 weeks ago?)
Pippa Cooms (Greenie cyclist action fruit)
Leila Boyle (ex Labour candidate)
Greg Presland (taking the Mickey out of politics as per usual)
Josephine Bartley (ex Labour candidate)
Grant Gillon (ex Alliance MP)
Grame Easte (the left wing Gnome of Mt Albert)

So then, a number of questions for the media to consider:

1. Have the 28 local board loons run out of local issues to consider, and must know apply their considerable business skills to solving the Ports crisis?
2. Did Len Brown know about his army of 28 loons launching into the Ports of Auckland in advance? if yes, did he try and counsel them against stickybeaking? If no, does that mean that Len has been marginalised by his comrades?
3. Does Len Brown approve of the stance of the 28, or does he continue to “back both sides”?
4. If Len disagrees with the 28, will he tell them to shut up and get back to local issues instead of stickybeaking into a council CCO that is tasked by the Mayor and Council to get on with their work?
5. If he won’t condemn them for stickybeaking, does that then mean this is now an official matter to discuss at future council meetings?
6. Is that presser a sign that Labour and the Greens are testing the waters for a plunge into the Ports crisis?
7. Is this just Michael Wood jockeying for position to take over from Phil Goff in Mt Roskill

I wonder what answers might come back after a bit of digging?

Today is the last day of the year and what a year it has been. The chaos and mayhem I created was:

January 2011 – 151 posts

The new year started with yet another case of celebrity name suppression. Martin Devlin had thrown a tanty and decided to bounce on the bonnet of his missus’ car. With the ensuing media frenzy he eventually outed himself.

I called time on the Royal NZ Ballet:

From the latest available published accounts for the Royal NZ Ballet.

For the 2009 year.

Ministry for Culture and Heritage funding – $3,959,000
Sponsorship and donations – $2,010,000
Box office revenue – $2,631,000
Total Revenue  - $8,600,000

On these figures the Royal NZ Ballet bludges $1.50 for every dollar they raise in ticket sales. That’s right, you and I pay $1.50 for every $1.00 some liberal elite wanker pays to sit and watch ballet.

I interviewed Judith Collins for my Summer Series interviews. I am yet to decide if I will do another Summer series.

I outed the Albany Superette for selling P-Pipes. It subsequently was followed in the MSM days later. I next day I got my first legal threat of the year.

On January 9 I highlighted Sunday Star Times and their dodgy polling company Horizon. They never learned from that post and went on to become completely discredited with their methodology and results. It still didn’t stop Radio Live from featuring them, though I understand that Horizon actually paid Mediaworks to do it.

I drove halfway down the Napier-Taupo highway to meet Garth McVicar for my Summer Series interviews. Followed up a few days later with an interview with Trevor Mallard. I doubt he will do another. While in Wellington I also popped in for coffee with Celia Wade-Brown and talked about her victory in the local body elections.

I started asking questions about Len Brown’s 100 things in 100 days. Len Brown starts to desperately look for things to do in his 100 days. On day 79 Len Brown released 52 things he was going to do.

On January 20 I reminded Len Brown about his promise for a referendum on Maori seats. This was before the Maori Statutory Board blew up in his face:

He made this promise throughout the campaign, but has chickened out of a referendum. On Q&A he was trying to buy himself some wriggle room.

On TVNZ’s Q & A yesterday, Mr Brown said a referendum on creating Maori seats on the council “may well” be possible in the next three years

This blog has reminded him of his promise here, here and here.

Brian Rudman felt obliged to attack Len Brown and his failure of the 100 things in 100 days promise.

I had a beer with Chris Trotter for my Summer Series interviews. I also went to the Unite Union bunker and interviewed Matt McCarten.

I asked whether or not Labour was snooping on your emails. This story develops in later months.

I started my battle with the Teachers unions.

The good people at Kaimata Retreat get suspicious of a lying blonde tart and google Pearl Going. They subsequently contact me and I out her re-emergence as a bullshit artist.

After Phil Goff handed in his man card by dying his hair I started a series of hair do suggestions for him.

 February 2011 – 187 posts

Chris Hipkins kicked off the first SMOG of Labour with porn spam on Facebook profile.

On February 2 John Key said no to Winston Peters and set the election date.

Len Brown finally released his full list of 100 useless things he was going to do inside 100 days.

On the 6th of February Len Brown fell for the classic Michael Bloomberg train sting. Jonathan Marshall and a photographer bust Len Brown and his hypocrisy over riding the rails to work.

The pressure built on Len Brown over his little train ride double standard.

I told Nikki Kaye that she could have a gay Mardis Gras but only if the government or council didn’t pay for it.

Michael Wood announced on 11 February that he wanted to ensure that there were no penis lollies in Botany despite the fact that there were no penis lollies in Botany.

Trevor Mallard uses Red Alert to attack Jami-lee Ross as a “Tory lump of lard” and accuses him of being a “nasty piece of work”.

On February 15 I said that Carmel Sepuloni wouldn’t win in Waitakere.

On 16 February I highlighted for the first time the skulduggery that was going on in Rodney electorate for the National party selection.

It was in February that we had a rash of MSM writing articles completely unrelated to Hanover and Mark Hotchin but tied them in in either headlines or the body of the article.

The Rodney Selection skulduggery continued. At this stage it only involved a local and the electorate chair, it was however to go much deeper than this. I then outed the involvement of a former South African white supremacist in the manipulations in the Rodney selections. It took several posts to tell the story.

Having dealt with the local skulduggery in Rodney it then became apparent that that there was two separate cases of skulduggery going down. The rather inept local incident with Brent Robinson and then the involvement of the regional hierarchy in attempting to stack appointed delegates. The Rodney selection was then postponed. It was to get much worse.

Serious muckraking was then deployed against Mark Mitchell. It was run by a sitting board member and involved a journalist as well. Things were getting very murky in Rodney electorate.

March 2011 – 187 posts

The Rodney selection was delayed so an audit of membership could be completed. On 4 March the selection process was cancelled and a new selection processed launched such was the level of skulduggery. A serious miscarriage of justice in selection was averted. The irony is the board member most deeply involved int eh murk now claims credit for halting the selection. This is hugely ironic because it was him that was visiting delegates with printouts of websites, a tactic that was later employed in Coromandel by the same board member on behalf of the same candidate.

The day after Jami-lee Ross won the Botany by-election Phil Goff claimed victory for the Labour party.

Speaking of the Labour party, I helpfully make some suggestions for their coming campaign. They ignored them. We know where that ended up.

Trevor Mallard hits a snag using email.

I leaked an email from Perry Rush of the NZPF outlining how they were going to run a campaign against Anne Tolley.

The very first Txts from New York.

I reviewed my Savage 17HMR from Hamills.

Labour’s inept campaign strategist, Trevor Mallard, is strangely silent on Twitter these days. After spending months telling caucus that Labour would win the campaign with social media he is now deathly quiet.

When Mallard is quiet then something is being plotted.

Fellow MP Trevor Mallard was unwilling to say who he backed. Asked whether the Labour number nine had any future leadership aspirations, he said: “You never know.”

That is quite a movement from his previous statements rejecting outright the leadership of Labour. Bryce Edwards thinks that Mallard could be a good caretaker leader though:

Edwards agrees the party has to get back to its roots. Mallard’s best days are over, but he would be a good caretaker leader, he says: “The party could use his mongrel, street-fighting sense to bring the party back to something that isn’t totally media-managed and scripted. At present it reeks of being a party of middle-income people and careerists.”

Michael Wood, the man who wanted ban penis-lollies, would have something to say about a resurgent Trevor Mallard though:

List candidate and Goff campaign manager Michael Wood, who at 32 on the list also missed out, is another one to watch, the source says. “They have to find spaces for these people. They have to ease people out of the party. They need to pick people solely on their ability.” Fenton, Ruth Dyson, Rajen Prasad and Trevor Mallard all need to go, he says.

For once I am in agreement with Michael Wood, Mallard needs to go.

UPDATE: I have received and email from Michael Wood who says those weren’t his words. I have re-read the passage and It may well be my poor comprehension.

Here is what Michael had to say:

None of those comments were mine, in fact there isn’t a single comment from me in the entire article. The comments are all from the source referred to throughout the article. The way that the para is written is slightly confusing so I can see how a genuine mis-reading of it could occur.

You may have a genuine view that I am an idiot, but I can assure you that I have a strong policy of not publicly calling for the heads of senior party MPs who I like and respect. In fact, on the basis that I am the narcissistic, careerist lickspittle you seem to think I am, you’d have to concede that a comment like that would be an unlikely act of self-immolation.

Michael might not think Mallard has to go, I how differ from the opinion, and am prepared to say so.

Cactus Kate continues the review of youth candidates. Today she looks at Labour and Greens candidtates:

Deborah Mahuta-Coyle

Should she be an MP? Of course not. Mahuta-Coyle joins a long list of Labour staffers who think they can be MP’s. Not many have done anything else but leave University and work in the Party.

Could she be an MP? For Labour, of course. She’s a perfect candidate. Academically better qualified than Kim Kardashian who has slipped her way up to number 13 on the Labour List, Mahuta-Coyle is also Tainui and a female that gives her as many points as all of Stuart Nash’s degrees and work experience combined.

Will she be an MP? Here is hoping not as it would mean Labour would have polled 30-33% on Saturday. I predict she will be miraculously “re-appointed” in the Opposition Leaders office working from Monday for Labour’s next leader.

Michael Wood

As an observer by far the best thing Michael has ever done in his life was marrying a woman far smarter and more politically astute than he is as she is picking Labour to lose three key electorates. Wood is also somewhat unique in that he is one of the only men I have read of in politics who does something called splitting childcare. That is, he works part-time to look after the kiddies. I cannot imagine “Iron” Mike Williams and his bovver boy mates ever sanctioning that.

Despite being the whipping boy to stand and fail in safe National seats, Wood seems to be a genuinely nice man who I have known of since University days. With his child minding duties he should be winning all those silly polls as to which politician would you leave your kiddies with? Wood doesn’t trumpet a great academic record, sporting prowess or anything really. He doesn’t have to, he’s a Unionist.

Jerome Mika

Mika is an EPMU bitch make no mistake about that. His candidate page is full of idealistic waffle and weasel words and should have been ripped apart by Labour’s Comms team and rewritten as it tells us absolutely nothing about him. At number 36 on the Labour list he needs 34% to have a look in so his wiki is premature as well.

Holly Walker

The horrid grating inequality thrashing is dull and boring which means she’s the perfect little card carrying pinko. Her rejection of fifth form economics puts her in line to be the Greens Finance Spokeswoman.

Julie Anne Genter

Should she be an MP? An American Greenie dictator of the New Zealand public transport system? I think not.

Could she be an MP? Bit of a one-trick pony in a farm facing the ETS really. It is bad enough having an Australian as the co-Leader, and now the Greens are foisting a Yank on the House of Representatives?

Will she be an MP? I hope so for no other reason than at number 13 on the Greens list it would mean Labour would have had an atrocious night and there will be blood on the floor.

Remember Daljit Singh?

He was the Labour candidate charged with vote rigging at the local body elections in Papatoetoe. Phil Goff should remember Daljit Singh because his predident, Andrew Little said at the time:

“The Labour Party is deeply disappointed that a candidate standing under its name is being prosecuted for alleged irregularities in enrolments for the local body elections”, Little said.

“There is no tolerance in our party for conduct that undermines the integrity of the electoral process.”

You have to wonder why then Phil Goff, Carol Beaumont, Rajen Prasad, Sunny Kaushal, Michael Wood, Ross Robertson, David Cunliffe, Su’a William Sio and other Labour candidates all attended a slap up feed and fundraiser organized by  Daljit Singh to fundraise on behalf of the Labour Party. They even posed for photos with Daljit Singh. This fundraiser was held two Friday’s ago on October 7.

You have to ask why it is that Labour’s leader risks his already poor reputation attending a fundraiser organised by a man still before the courts, poses for photographs with the same man and all for a small amount of around $10,000 which was the amount raised.

It surprises me that Phil Goff continues to associate the Labour Party and accept funds from a man currently before the courts.

If National win Mana, Palmerston North, Rimutaka, Christchurch Central and Waimakariri then the following lose their electorate seats:

• Cosgrove
• Fa’afoi
• Hipkins
• Lees-Galloway
• Burns

If they lose them and Labour stay at 29% in the polls then the following five stay or make it to Parliament.

• Deborah Mahuta-Coyle
• Stuart Nash
• Brendon Burns
• Chris Hipkins
• Michael Wood

In a victory for all those who oppose penis lollies Michael Wood replaces the stenographer rooter Iain Lees-Galloway. Stuart Nash replaces Fa’afoi.

All this makes you wonder a lot about the gaggle of gays and how they rigged the list ranking process. There is no way that Labour are better served by long time trougher and serial useless bastard Rick Barker than they would be with short term trougher and ex-rooter Stu Nash. One represents the distant past, and not to well either, and the other the future. Why did the gaggle decide Rick was worth more than Stu?

Unless the Labour caucus can grow some balls and work out that unless they “Gillard” Goff some very good capable talent will be lost to them for a very long time and labour will not be in contention fro several more cycles. julia Gillard rolled Kevin Rudd and saved labour just two short months before the election in Australia.

Does anyone in Labour here have the courage to do that?

After his spanking in Botany Labout has ditched their much vaunted union patsy Michael Wood for the upcoming election. Instead they have chosen Chau-Fu Wu to lose in the Botany seat against Jami-Lee Ross this year. I note the extreme confidence Labour has in selecting Mr Wu, he is in 70th and last place on Labour’s list. Michael Wood is at 32 and may just get there on current polling.

It makes Labour’s commitments to Botany by Michael Wood during the by-election look pretty shallow don’t ya think?

So where is the penis lolly crusader looking to stand, now he and Labour have again abandoned Botany?

Perhaps he is keeping his options open so he can stand in the Mt Roskill by-election in February.

Well, it appears he is helping a Labour MP and a Labour candidate visit the Takanini Gurudwara.

Rajen Prasad and Michael Wood visited the temple on the invitation of Mr Daljit Singh who is currently facing charges of fraudulently enrolling voters in the recent Local Body elections. He was also pictured as one of Len Brown’s loyal supporters. I notice that Labour isn’t calling for a speedy resolution for this candidate for his pending court case.

The case which has serious implications for local democracy is still in the courts yet Labour MPs are visiting the temple and associating with this man.  A shameful exercise indeed for Labour’s rising star, Michael Wood, not only to visit the temple along with Rajen Prasad but to promote Daljit Singh further by presenting him a memento.

From wanting to ban penis lollies in Botany to now being associated with an alleged vote rigger, Michael Wood is certainly working his way into the cheating ethos that besets the Labour party.

The Herald editorial talks about the paucity of talent in Labour’s list:

The Labour Party has 43 seats in the present Parliament. If it wins at least that many at this year’s election it will bring in eight new names from the list it published on Sunday: Andrew Little, Deborah Mahuta-Coyle, Michael Wood, Kate Sutton, Jerome Mika, Josie Pagani, Lynette Stewart and Jordan Carter. If the party maintains its improvement in the latest poll – suggesting pressure on its leader over his handling of Darren Hughes has done Phil Goff and his party no harm – Labour can look forward to many more than 43 MPs.

The names Christine Rose, Glenda Alexander, Susan Zhu, Rino Tirikatene, Sehai Orgad and Megan Woods could be in the House too. There are not many pale males among all those names. Party lists are intended to bring a better gender balance and more ethnic diversity into democratic representation. Labour’s makes a meal of it.

It has also learned from recent experience not to put old names low on its list where they could be next in line to replace any list MP who fails to serve a full term. There are no Judith Tizards in a position to return at the expense of fresh talent this time.

They also note the long term effects of the T-Bomb. There doesn’t appear to be any Tizards lurking down the list to embarrass them after the election.

But the downside of that lesson is that there are no new names high on the list. With few exceptions, sitting MPs occupy all the places down to number 35. Most of them are also standing in electorates, which means that if any are rejected by the voters they will return on the list. The real winners of any party’s list selection, in the public eye at least, are probably electorate MPs who want no place on it.

They go on to commend Lianne Dalziel as I have for her decision to abandon being ont eh List. She knows better than most that scum list MPs are hated.

The list system remains an unsatisfactory element of MMP to members and voters alike. The lists are drawn up by party panels out of the public eye. Electorate candidates are selected in similar secrecy, but at least those selected have to pass muster at public election meetings and voters have put a tick beside their names.

The list system is the single worst aspect about MMP and one of the reasons why it should be chucked aside.

Labour front-bench reacts positively to the appointment of Michael Wood

In breaking political news today, the Labour Party governing council has appointed former candidate and union worker Michael Wood to the strategy committee for the upcoming elections.

Wood, who recently served the Labour Party as their Botany by-election candidate, immediately helped set the scene for Labour this year by declaring that Labour could not possibly win.

“I’m determined to manage expectations for Labour so we can declare a moral victory on election night, even if we are soundly thrashed in the actual result,” said Wood.

Labour leader Phil Goff welcomed the appointment of Wood, saying “Labour needs honest refreshing perspectives for the election this year. The public can really believe in Labour when we make it absolutely clear that we can not win. That in itself is reason to support Labour.”

Wood outlined further perspectives on Labour strategy for 2011, going heavily negative on National. ” National is practicing the mathematics of defeat. By consistently polling above 50%, National have nowhere to go but down. This should seriously unnerve voters. ”

He also announced a shift to the right on social policy, declaring war on the insidious growth in consumption and distribution of penis lollies at local dairies. “We must stop penis lollies being distributed to our children, even if they are succulent and gummy,” said Wood.

Political commentator Youmus Bejoshin was slightly puzzled by the appointment of Wood to this campaign role. “Wood’s declaration of Labour’s impending defeat is logical enough, but I don’t understand the move right on social policy to ban penis lollies. Perhaps this is a sop to Winston Peters should he be in a position to join Labour in opposition.”

Bejoshin also pointed out that the easy availability of penis lollies might act as a nice sweet chewy substitute for predatory behaviour by members of parliament in recent times.