Steven Braunias is all class. Cam met him at the awards. He asked if Cam was offended by the wickedly funny piece he did on him back When Cam was Editor of Truth.
How is Laila viewed by the common folk?
We now know how Michele Hewitson sees her but what about Mr and Mrs Average?
I popped over to the Trademe message boards to find out and was surprised to find out how popular she was.
I have put my favourite comments in bold type.
Years ago when Cam was not at his best he was interviewed by Michele Hewitson. The stand out line from her interview for me was her comment that he had ‘ dead eyes,’ so it was of no surprise to me whatsoever to see her comments on Laila Harre.
Don’t hold back Michele tell us what you really think.
Michele Hewitson has done a column on David Shearer and I get the impression that she isn’t impressed. I suspect that Michele simply had nothing to work with, so bland is David Shearer.
He said, seriously: “I am what I am.”
I’m afraid that made me laugh my head off, because who says that? And what the hell does it mean? But, later, after spending an hour and a half with him, and after having transcribed that hour and a half, I concluded that he’s probably absolutely right. It’s one way of saying what you see is what you get, whatever that means. But I still think he should never say it again; it’s seriously awful.
That is Michele’s way of saying “I’ve got nothing”.
Shearer though has manged to kill off the carefully crafted back-story created by campaign supremo Conor Roberts:
He knows the value of a good back story. He says the PM has a good one: “rags to riches.” His might be even better: did he really save 50 million lives? That Key went overseas and made 50 million dollars and he went overseas and saved 50 million lives was a line doing the rounds during the leadership battle with David Cunliffe (they get on terribly well, of course, and of course there is no animosity – I should have known better than to have asked.)
The answer is “no”. Well, where did it come from then? “I don’t know! You’re the journo!” All right, how many lives did he save? Any? “Um. Not personally!” That made the journo laugh immoderately, which made him just the tiniest bit defensive, the journo thought.
He told me a longish story about working for Save the Children in Somalia and heading a team feeding 30,000 starving children. “So when you look back on your life and you think these people who would now be in their 20s are alive because of the work we did … Which is pretty neat.” That’s a nice story, of course it is. I was sorry to have to be a journo but I had a not-so nice follow-up question: is that better than going overseas and making $50 million, did he think? He gave me a look which was more Helen than Phil. He said: “I don’t know. Now, that’s not right. That’s not a fair comparison.”
I guess we won’t be hearing much more about that back-story.
Is he nice, or nicer than Phil? “He’s a very nice man.” But is he nicer than him? He said I’d have to ask Phil, which obviously I’m not going to do. So I’ll answer my own question like this: after an interview with Goff I got a sweet little peck on the cheek; from his successor I got another of his handshakes.
Comparisons, if not odious, are not terribly helpful, and I hadn’t set out to make quite so many. But he’s hard to fix in your mind. I can’t quite work out why.
Again Michele is teling us that after an hour and half she got nothing except her hands crushed. And then we find out that Michele is an avid reader of Cactus Kate:
Everyone used to bang on about how good-looking Key was, which I never understood. I’ll stick my neck out and say that Shearer is better looking (if it matters and it may), although not in any flashy way, and certainly not in any way that translates to the telly. And I bet he doesn’t turn up at another event with his shirt unbuttoned as he did at the Big Gay Out.
He said, slightly snippily, that it was a hot day and that he does get around on hot days with his shirt unbuttoned. That just made it worse, I said. He said he probably wouldn’t do it again: “Now that you’ve told me.”
Michele Hewitson will be disappointed with that article, but given the clay she was given to mould it was the best she could do.
In 2010 I created following chaos and mayhem:
- told the truth repeatedly about Andrew Williams, the Clown of Campbells Bay. This resulted in his unemployment from anything to do with local body governance in Auckland.
- made Len Brown tell us something he said he would never reveal. The only pity was the lying, deceit and interference by officials thwarting the Ombudsmen for so long. In the end Len Brown rewarded the main obstruction, Leigh Auton, by giving him a cushy board appointment despite him robbing rate-payers of a nice 6 figure redundancy package.
- got charged with 10 counts of breaching name suppression and convicted of 9. In the process I made the government have a discussion and make changes with the name suppression laws in this country.
- appeared on 60 minutes and in every news outlet in New Zealand. This show was one of the top 5 shows for the year, both in ratings for 60 minutes and also with online views (20541 views so far).
- Got Simon Power‘s nickname, FIGJAM, written into case law.
- had someone write a song about Name Suppression.
- created an urban myth about Jim Anderton and his Earthquake statement.
- Uploaded a video to Youtube which then made the news and went on to have more than 440,000 views.
- made Len Brown slap himself silly.
- made Mangrove throw a hissy fit in a Sunday paper.
- outed veteran Maori troughers Te Reo Marama and Shane Bradbrook. They have since had all their funding cut to nothing.
- appeared at the Maori Affairs select committee to talk about Maori troughers ripping off the taxpayer.
- screwed up a story about Chris Carter, but apologised for it.
- rooted up Veuve Clicquot and NBR, making Barry Colman cough an extra $7000 in piss. BTW when is the party you slack cow???
- scared Michele Hewitson into a soft story with my “dead eyes”.
- Hijacked the Qantas Media Awards best Blog awards by holding the NZ Bloggers Union and Air New Zealand Blog Awards…real awards voted on by blogging judges.
- Outed Len Brown for touting for donations using council email. This was a story that Bernard Orsman refused to cover saying there was no evidence of it despite me publishing a full copy of the email.
- Called time on a content thief, Rich Henry.
- Made National Party president, Peter Goodfellow have his own extreme makeover after I compared him to Ned Flanders. Thousands of dollars of botox and a moustache trim, eye brow pluck and a new hair cut, he now thinks he is okalee-dokaly.
Warning: Vanity Post.
A text arrived from Cameron Slater – the firebrand blogger who could start a fight in an empty brown paper bag, and often does, and who has the deadest eyes I’ve ever seen. He said I’d misquoted him. He had called somebody (who I didn’t name, for obvious reasons) a “corpse fiddler”. Or so I had reported. His text message read: “I said corpse cuddler. I always use alliteration.” This is the one occasion on which I wish I had misquoted somebody: The correction would have been a cracker. Alas, I was right – on quite possibly the only occasion on which Slater had to admit, and with good humour, that he was wrong.
To quote Farrar…heh!
Warning vanity post.
I’ve seen a lot of hand-wringing about her articles and a great deal of angst, but I don’t think people get what Michele is about. Her articles aren’t meant to be deep meaningful, nitty-gritty issues discovery sessions that people think they should be. They are quirky and she sets out to reveal the people behind the mask, so to speak.
I found the the whole process enjoyable, well as enjoyable as it can be suffering hyper-vigilance in a cafe, and exhaustion from a week with an average of 3 hours sleep a night. Michele picked up my utter exhaustion, she described my eyes which give away my depression, my exhaustion and my state of being.
That said Michele can sniff fear and she also has an uncanny ability to disarm you, which is why people usually cop a flogging in her articles. Even Brian Edwards is afraid of her…I’m not and still am not, plus I have had a policy of not hiding anything. I reckon she did a great job with a poor subject.
Meanwhile online I was Question 3 in the online Stuff Daily Trivia Quiz.
The pinko lap-bloggers of Labour at The Standard are upset too, that is always good. I’m wondering when they will realise that being, in their own minds at least, the online anonymous versions of NZPA and Red Radio is boring, and no-one but their own echo chamber is listening. The point I make is that it is them talking about me and not the other way round.
The same goes for creepy little comedians on Red Radio. Hey dickhead, you are talking about me (is it just me is but isn’t this radio show just utter shite), apparently though I am the blogger who shall not be named, the Voldemort of the blogsphere. Even Lianne Dalziel thinks I’m The Blogger Who Shall Not Be Named, as she got all bent out of shape in a slect committee. Now this is hugely funny, because they both prove my point in that keeping a secret, telling everyone that there is a secret just makes people want to know what that secret is. I’ve never heard of Jeremy Elwood….but I just bet he is a mate of Jamie Linehan….which is why he will be upset about my stance on name suppression….and we know then what that makes him.
A Danish citizen of Moroccan descent and two Tunisians were arrested in Denmark on Tuesday over a plot to murder one of 12 cartoonists whose drawings of the Prophet Mohammad caused worldwide uproar in 2006.
According to Jyllands-Posten, the newspaper that originally published the cartoons in September 2005, the suspects are accused of planning to kill 73-year-old Kurt Westergaard.
He drew the cartoon that caused the most controversy, depicting the founder of Islam with a bomb in his turban.
The paper reproduced that drawing on its website on Tuesday.
I republish that cartoon in solidarity with Kurt Westergaard.
For the attempted murderers, Pigs Be Upon Them
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