Monty Python

Maybe Labour isn’t dead, it’s just restin’

Chris Trotter writes a post that has a remarkable resemblance to Monty Python’s Dead Parrot sketch.

IF IT HAD ONLY HAPPENED ONCE, I could have written it off as a simple overstatement. Politics lends itself to exaggeration, and there was a lot of that associated with the Labour Party’s Review of the 2014 General Election. But, what I’m describing wasn’t the usual bluff and bluster of the instant commentariat. What I was hearing was coming from “civilians” – people without a platform – ordinary folks. And, what they’ve been saying to me, over and over again, in the week or so since the Review was leaked to TV3’s Paddy Gower, is the same statement-cum-question:  “I think Labour’s finished as a major party – what do you think?”

Now, this is a not the sort of statement/question that political parties ever want to hear. Because it isn’t just another complaint about this leader, or that policy. No, this is an existential query: and existential queries only get made when the subject has already got at least one foot (and a good portion of leg) in the political grave.

I recall people saying very similar things about the Alliance after it split apart over Afghanistan. And they’ve been writing off Act as a zombie party for at least the past six years (quite correctly, in my opinion). Some people were even moved to question National’s future after its Party Vote plummeted to 20.9 percent in the general election of 2002.

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Why Labour isn’t connecting

Labour is a glass is half empty type of party.

They can never, to partial quote Monty Python, never “look on the bright side of life”.

The aren’t aspirational, mainly because most of then look at life through the rear view mirror, always looking wistfully at the past and where we have been but never at the future and where we are going.

Take a look at this graphic from Labour that their adherents and forelock tuggers are chucking around social media.

labour-halfempty Read more »

Is Andrew Little actually Mumbly Joe?

Andrew Little starts this video with more ahhhs and errrs and other temporisers than you would believe possible for something he could repeat it until he got it right?

Has he ever heard of a lapel mike?

Note the Lumberjack shirt in clear contrast to Grant Robertson.

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Labour list “lacklustre”

The Dom Post editorial pulls no punches

Politicians who are past their use-by date rarely go voluntarily. And perhaps Labour leader David Cunliffe decided that a forced purge would simply be too damaging to a party that is already in trouble. Renewal can be another name for bloodbath, although National has managed to refresh its line-up without great strife. Perhaps renewal is easier in a party that is doing well.

So we are left with the current caucus dominating the winnable list, and a number of unimpressive MPs in constituency seats. These are of course more difficult to shift than list candidates who can simply be moved down the rankings. But someone should have tried harder to persuade Ruth Dyson to retire this time. The West Coast’s Damien O’Connor and Mangere’s Su’a William Sio similarly add no value to the Labour Party brand and should move on. Hutt South’s Trevor Mallard dresses up his decision not to seek a list place as a magnanimous gesture to help Kelvin Davis in the north. But Mallard’s is a solid working class seat and if he can’t win it for Labour he shouldn’t seek a lifeboat on the list.

Dysfunctional is the word to describe the Labour party.  They can’t shift the career troughers that are hogging the party’s safe seats.  Their list is populated and arranged by gender, sexual orientation and union balance.  Their new talent won’t even make it to parliament because they are too far down the list.

And to top it all off, there is a near vacuum of talent dragging everything towards an election oblivion.   Read more »

Photo Of The Day

Monty Python's Flying Circus, Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, Eric Idle, Terry Jones & Michael Palin vamp it up for the camera.

Members of Monty Python’s Flying Circus vamp for the camera in this April 1976 photo. From left to right: John Cleese, Michael Palin, Terry Gilliam, and Terry Jones.

This bloke would be a bettter MP than Rajan Prasad

In a case of life imitating art, in Indian they have the hindu equivalent of the dead parrot sketch from Monty Python…except it is a guru wot is not dead, ‘e’s restin’, or ‘e’s stunned.

The family and followers of one of India’s wealthiest Hindu spiritual leaders are fighting a legal battle over whether he is dead or simply in a deep state of meditation.

His Holiness Shri Ashutosh Maharaj, the founder of the Divya Jyoti Jagrati Sansthan religious order with a property estate worth an estimated £100 million, died in January, according to his wife and son.

However, his disciples at his Ashram have refused to let the family take his body for cremation because they claim he is still alive.    Read more »

And you thought getting rid of the army was a joke…

The other day I wrote about the suggestion from the Internet Party to abandon the GCSB and our long standing 50 year security relationships with the UK, USA, Australia and Canada and additionally suggest that perhaps other parties might seek to disband the army.

One astute reader pointed out that a policy such as that is already Green party policy.

Not only do they want to get rid of the SIS and GCSB, the ANZAC frigates, and anti-submarine warfare equipment, but they also want to get rid of the army and start ‘Investigating the development of civilian based defence where some citizens are trained to resist aggression or usurpation by withholding cooperation and by active non-cooperation rather than military force.’

So…if Labour and their support parties including the Greens take over, their master plan is to make us too annoying to invade?

Because we’ll act like stubborn and sullen 4th formers?   Read more »

Sunday nightCap

(Just to get us all fired up for another week of Nazi Internet Party fun!)

Bring out your dead! Life imitates art

Monty Python may well be satire, but sometimes life imitates art.

A funeral director in Mississippi got a bit of a shock this week when a man, brought to him in a body bag, kicked to get out just before he was to be embalmed, a local TV station reported.

“He was not dead, long story short,” funeral director Byron Porter told broadcaster WAPT late on Thursday.  Read more »

Back to work this week?