Today is the last day of Movember. Tomorrow I shave.
Thank you to my contributors.
This is a cause I feel strongly about and I’m asking you to support my efforts by making a donation to me. To help, you can either:
•   Click this link http://nz.movember.com/donate/your-details/member_id/17568/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account
•   Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation,’ referencing my Registration Number 17568 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 12708, Wellington, 6144
All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
Movember is nearly over, there are just 4 days to go.
The month has been dominated by tragic news on the West Coast. Nevertheless I said I would support Movember and so continue onwards.
This is a cause I feel strongly about and I’m asking you to support my efforts by making a donation to me. To help, you can either:
•   Click this link http://nz.movember.com/donate/your-details/member_id/17568/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account
•   Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation,’ referencing my Registration Number 17568 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 12708, Wellington, 6144
All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
He says now that he was joking. I don’t for a minute think this weak, pathetic individual was joking. What I find apalling is he has continued to attack people that she sees as having mental health issues, all during Movember. He undoes all the hard work people like Mike King and John Kirwan have done to get people toi understand that people with mental illness are people just like you and me, just they struggle with some aspects.
Michael Laws - C**t of the Year
Michael Laws is a coward and a bully, and a coward and bully of the worst kind, picking on people who are struggling at the best of times. Of course, he could just be talking about himself given the vast amount of time he consumes inhabiting Facebook along with his little fan club of felchers.
have, twice, seriously considered suicide as the most rational reply to adversity.
In the first instant, it was as a lovelorn teenager in the first year of university studies and after being dumped by my then girlfriend. It was a measure of both my insecurity and my anguish that this relationship break-up prompted such self-destructive thoughts.
Having made the decision to end it all – with as much melodrama as I could muster – my next problem was, how? By the time I’d resolved that issue, I had discovered that a combination of testosterone and the welcoming smile of another had carried me over the abyss….
…
The media, for example, deliberately restricts itself from reporting any of the salient details relating to a suicidal death. Their fear – pressed upon them by public health officials – is that talking about suicide will provoke more copycat victims.
Nonsense. Indeed to use such logic, let’s stop talking about road deaths, mental illness, welfare dependence and criminal offending. There will, of course, be dramatic reductions in antisocial and destructive activities all because we choose to ignore them.
Because, sometimes, suicide is so damned rational and right. Or so it seems.
It certainly was when I was in the child oncology ward of Starship Children’s Hospital two years ago. When I was informed that my daughter Lucy was likely to die, my world dissolved. I could see no point to existence if she were not a part of my life.
And I also started thinking of death from the perspective of Lucy. When she dies (the “if” seemed to have been removed from the equation) then where does she go? Are the rationalists right, nowhere? Or are the Christians and popular culture on the right track to think she would walk off into the light somewhere?
All I knew is that I did not want my golden girl to walk there alone. I would have gone too: I knew that then, and I know that now.
It makes no sense, it seems, to write those words in August 2010. But they made perfect sense in February 2008. And I was a sane man.
Well, we can know that all that waffle is just bullshit, from a bullshit artist, intent only on self promotion at the expense of others. No “sane” person contemplates suicide. Even if the “insanity” is temporary, it is still insanity that one can see that a permanent solution to a temporary problem is a good idea.
It is for this reason that Michael Laws is this years C**t of the Year.
If you care more about people suffering with mental health issues then you can donate to Movember and help us ignore the Michael Laws of this world. One more word of advice for Michael, as I know he reads the blog. NFWAB.
Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation,’ referencing my Registration Number 17568 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 12708, Wellington, 6144
All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
It is still Movember and so you guys out there can do your part to help. There are still 10 days left.
I am doing this because close to one in ten men will experience depression in their lifetime. Many of these men do not seek help.
This is a cause I feel strongly about and I’m asking you to support my efforts by making a donation to me. To help, you can either:
•   Click this link http://nz.movember.com/donate/your-details/member_id/17568/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account
•   Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation,’ referencing my Registration Number 17568 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 12708, Wellington, 6144
All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
In the middle of Movember you decide to label bloggers as suffering from mental illness. Well welcome to the sh*t-storm that all bloggers will unleash upon you for calling us all mental.
To Donate to Movember, you can either:
•   Click this link http://nz.movember.com/donate/your-details/member_id/17568/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account
•   Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation,’ referencing my Registration Number 17568 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 12708, Wellington, 6144
I have always been up front about my own personal battle with Depression. I have fronted on my own demons. It is time Michael Laws started confronting his own demons, and they are considerable. It is time that bloggers and media everywhere started calling this blackmailer, bullshit artist on his crap and started outing his reprehensible bullying and predator behaviour.
There is power in speaking the truth, something Michael Laws is a stranger to.
I wonder what his fellow Radio host at Radio Live, Mike King thinks about such labels during Movember, an event that Mike King is an ambassador for. I wonder too what John Kirwan thinks of such comments during Movember.
Michaels Laws is a cowardly little weak man with a body like a half sucked throatie. By abusing bloggers for their mental health has just added him to my sh*t-list, a list from which no one ever gets off.
Here is a video that Michael laws would do well to heed. (WARNING: NSFW, Do not play at work)
Still no action from Fidelity Life, who seem to think that my depression magically went away. Well they think that because their doctors (Prof. Des Gorman, Ralf Schnabel and Dr. Anthony Asteraidis) told them that I no longer had a head injury and so I was cured. The fact that I never had a head injury in the first place and never claimed for that seems to have escaped their collective thoughts.
Nonetheless the battle continues and the last few days have been a bit tough.
I am doing Movember because one in ten men will experience depression in their lifetime. Many of these men do not seek help.
This is a cause I feel strongly about and I’m asking you to support my efforts by making a donation to me. To help, you can either:
•   Click this link http://nz.movember.com/donate/your-details/member_id/17568/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account
•   Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation,’ referencing my Registration Number 17568 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 12708, Wellington, 6144
All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
To join my Movember team go to http://nz.movember.com/register/105390 and follow the steps. Once registered you’ll be sent all the information you need to raise funds and start growing as part of my Movember team.
I have said that music is one o the things that gets me through my depression and DPD episodes. Here is another of my favourites, The Verve, Lucky Man, again it is a combination of the words and the tune that I like. The songs that help the most mean something to me, and the songs snap me out (temporarily) of my DPD episodes.
The only sad thing is that the f*ckwits at EMI don’t allow embedding…I have o idea why they would do that…surely they’d like to see their songs spread far and wide.
The only industry more intransigent and unreasonable than the music industry is the insurance industry and companies like Fidelity Life who ignore medical advice and add to their clients mental health issues by treating them like crap.
You can support Movember  by making a donation to me or my team. To help, you can either:
•   Click this link http://nz.movember.com/donate/your-details/member_id/17568/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account
•   Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation,’ referencing my Registration Number 17568 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 12708, Wellington, 6144
All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
To join my Movember team go to http://nz.movember.com/register/105390 and follow the steps. Once registered you’ll be sent all the information you need to raise funds and start growing as part of my Movember team.
Today is my birthday, it is also the day that 6 years ago I went to the doctor and found out that the reason I wanted to punch every one out and was so utterly exhausted at the same time was because I suffered from depression.
That started what has been a six year battle with depression, anti-depressants, a scum insurance company called Fidelity Life and their equally scum doctors Des Gorman, Anthony Asteraidis and Ralf Schnabel (medical professionals who make their living almost exclusively from insurance companies). It is only now, after de-toxing myself from the anti-depressants that I also find out that covered up under all the medication and depression was de-personlisation disorder. Adam Duritz lead singer of the Counting Crows published an essay in which he describes his experience with suffering from depersonalization disorder. (It is the best, but also most frightening description of what it is like with depersonalisation disorder)
Now that I no longer have the anti-depressants in my system I can start to address the causes of my depression in a meaningful way instead of plastering over the cracks.
Fidelity Life thought a year ago that I was cured, this despite their own medical evidence, yet in the past year I haven’t managed to even remotely get near working. In that year I have lost my house, been in court, and removed all drugs from my system, this year has been one of the hardest of my life, it is almost as if I am starting a new life.
I realise now, even, if Fidelity Life doesn’t, that I will now live with the spectre of depression for the rest of my life. It isn’t something, now after 6 years, that will just go away. I live every day hoping I don’t slip into a DPD episode or wake up in the morning so utterly exhausted just from surviving the previous day that I can’t get out of bed.
Three things keep it all at bay, or at least help when depression and DPD strikes. The gym, music and blogging.
When I say the gym, I don’t mean some namby-pamby poofs type of gym, I mean my mate Buck‘s gym in the heart of South Auckland, where fatties, gang members, both patched and un-patched, Pasifika, Maori plus a few of us whitey go. A gym where there are no sooks, and there are no soft options. When I go to the gym it is for two hours at least and it is tough. It needs to be to reset my core being. because in living with depression for 6 years I have learned and understood the pathology of the illness so that I can try to combat it.
For me, my form of depression is the “fight response”. That means my body thinks it is always in a battle. The closer to the edge of depression I get the shallower my breathing becomes, its all automatic, the body is designed that way to divert oxygen to the muscles for battle or for flight. It is one of the reasons why John Kirwan was able to perform so well despite his depression, literally his body was tuned to provide huge amounts of oxygen to the fast twitch muscles which enabled him to score magnificent tries like there was no-one in front of him. This is the same mechanism that causes people in high stress situations, in battle, in acidents, in trauma situation can perform huge feats of physical amazement. It is the ancient “berserker” mechanism of the Vikings. The problem is my body is set on that full time. With it come determination, hyper-vigilance, and utter, utter exhaustion. Eventually if you don’t reset you just collapse as I well know. The gym forces your body to breathe deeply and helps reset.
I encourage anyone suffering depression to start of by going for good, hard long walks or bike rides. Trust me it will help. It is what got me started on the road to recovery.
It is only now after I have purged the drugs from my body that I am finally starting to feel like I am getting on top of the “Black Dog”. But it is still a daily battle. As I mentioned music helps and in particular some songs that have a great deal of meaning for me. Here is one I listen to frequently. It helps to express out loud what is going on inside.
Of course I don’t have to tell you about my blogging, you are all my loyal and understanding fans so you know already how that helps. by reading and commenting and supporting you have all helped me immensely and for that I thank you you all.
I will continue the fight against depression and I will continue to try to educate people as to why depression isn’t just about feeling a bit sad. Unfortunately Insurance companies and Fidelity Life in particular don’t seem to grasp this issue and continue to force feed their clients and patients with cocktails of drugs that do nothing to address the core issues of depression. The pity is that Fidelity Life doesn’t want to talk so I will have have to educate them in a court room, an education that will cost them far more than a few meetings.
Movember is a cause I feel strongly about and I’m asking you to support my efforts by making a donation to me. To help, you can either:
•   Click this link http://nz.movember.com/donate/your-details/member_id/17568/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account
•   Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation,’ referencing my Registration Number 17568 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 12708, Wellington, 6144
All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
To join my Movember team go to http://nz.movember.com/register/105390 and follow the steps. Once registered you’ll be sent all the information you need to raise funds and start growing as part of my Movember team.
This Movember, the month formerly known as November I’ve decided to donate my face to raising awareness about prostate cancer and depression in men. My donation and commitment is the growth of a moustache for the entire month of Movember, which I know will generate conversation, controversy and laughter.
I am doing this because close to 3,000 men are diagnosed with prostate cancer in New Zealand each year and one in ten men will experience depression in their lifetime. Many of these men do not seek help.
This is a cause I feel strongly about and I’m asking you to support my efforts by making a donation to me. To help, you can either:
•   Click this link http://nz.movember.com/donate/your-details/member_id/17568/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account
•   Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation,’ referencing my Registration Number 17568 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 12708, Wellington, 6144
All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
To join my Movember team go to http://nz.movember.com/register/105390 and follow the steps. Once registered you’ll be sent all the information you need to raise funds and start growing as part of my Movember team.
Through its men’s health partners, The New Zealand Mental Health Foundation and the Cancer Society of New Zealand, Movember is funding world class research, educational and support programs which would otherwise not be possible.
Once again I’m joining the growing club of modern gentlemen who believe in the virtues of fine moustachery, immaculate grooming and growing a moustache for Movember. I am looking for like-minded ladies and gentlemen to join my team to change the face of men’s health.
Movember is about raising funds and awareness for men’s health, specifically prostate cancer and depression in men. Close to 3,000 men are diagnosed with prostate cancer in New Zealand each year and 1Â in 10 men will experience depression in their lifetime. Many of these men do not seek help.
I think it’s time we did something about this.
The more people I can get on board, the more lives we can impact. I am asking you to join my team and either grow a moustache as a Mo Bro, or join as a Mo Sista to help recruit other gentlemen.
To join my Movember team go to http://nz.movember.com/register/105390 and follow the steps. Once registered you’ll be sent all the information you need to raise funds and start growing as part of my Movember team.
There’s been a lot of latte-drinking people who have the luxury to contemplate the constitutional niceties. That’s wonderful if you’re not digging sewage out of your own home. — Clayton Cosgrove, http://bit.ly/ccJ2kH
