Phoenix

Steven Seagal comes down with Gareth Morgan syndrome

You know the one,  ‘I’m rich, famous/well known, and people need to hear what I think’ syndrome. The need that they feel once they’ve achieved a comfortable bank account and it is time to poke their snotty noses in everyone elses business and tell them how to run their lives. Don’t do this, don’t eat that…..really this shit gets tiring. The self appointed world authorities on everything. 

PHOENIX – Action-movie star Steven Seagal says he is considering a run for Arizona governor.

The “Marked for Death” actor told KNXV-TV that he is considering a shot at the state’s highest office and has had a talk about the bid with the self-proclaimed toughest sheriff in America.

The 61-year-old made the comments while talking about his newly released reality series “Steven Seagal – Lawman: Maricopa County.”

Seagal teamed up with Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio for the show that was shot in Arizona and airs on cable TV’s Reelz Channel.

The martial arts expert is a member of Arpaio’s posse, made up of 3,000 unpaid civilians. He also has been deputized with sheriff’s offices in New Mexico, Texas and Louisiana and says he wants to increase border security. – AP

Now, lets see what kind of a political candidate he is, because he was a third rate actor that never won anything except for nominations for worst picture, worst actor and worst director. Read more »

Phoenix ‘dead cat bounce’ or more sinister?

That must be one financial term that makes Gareth ‘Cat Killer’ Morgan wince.

Or, is there a lot more to this given what is happening in Australian sport given the A-League has been implicated  – Victoria’s Deputy Police Commissioner Ashton saying A-League matches attract huge betting pools from overseas:

“We’re seeing vast increases in the betting pools in Asia on A-League soccer,” Deputy Commissioner Ashton said. He added that one bookmaker alone had taken more than $40 million on one A-League match”.

Let us face it things are damn odd for a team that started the season so well (we’ll call that Phoenix ‘BG’), which has gone onto have the worst goal difference by a country mile (Phoenix ‘AG’).

Since our equivalent to Pelé put the ‘cat among the pigeons’ saying his team was going to play ‘total football’, they managed to concede 7 goals against Sydney despite the lisping one’s tactical brilliance.

In spite of Morgan, the Phoenix miraculously staged a mini-comeback, drawing one game and winning another.  That lifted them from last on the A-League to a massive second to last.

Given they were trounced 5-0 last night in Australia last night that comeback was a dead cat bounce.

Radio LIVESport had a field day on what is going wrong with one host asking Gareth to keep away from Hurricanes training (there must be a Tui billboard in that).

Gareth Morgan’s inspirational leadership is allowing teams to play total football except it is against his team and not by his team.

In the last two away games, the Phoenix has conceded an amazing 12 goals.

Then again, given what Victoria’s Police is looking into, if anyone has heard rumours of betting irregularities then please tell me via the Tip Line.

Gareth Morgan still hates pussy

It is official, Gareth Morgan is not into pussy in any way, shape or form.  Who knows, maybe he was terrified by one as an infant but KiwiBank must be moving quickly to rebrand the under-performing fund they overpaid for.

I have a name suggestion for them, how about “KiwiBank Saver?” I can even do up a logo because at the rate Morgan’s mouth is going, I seriously doubt you will have many customers left.

But proving Morgan must have a taste for public sadomasochism, he has popped up on that soft cock Campbell Live last night.  This time Morgan unleashed his much vaunted phase II master stroke; a $5 bounty on each cat.

If the SPCA are clever, they should send him a bill for every cat they have to euthanize. As you all know I don’t much like cats but I don’t like animal abusers either.  I can see Morgan’s brainless idea unleashing fruitcakes claiming the bounty. This will get nasty since it comes from a desperate mad nasty little man who cannot deduce ‘cause’ from ‘effect’.  Read more »

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Gareth Morgan FC (aka the Phoenix) eye smaller venue

Having insulted virtually every Phoenix supporter, it seems Mad Gareth Morgan is left with a hard core of 1,000 according to the Dom Post:

“The Welnix consortium has had talks with Wellington City Council about downsizing from the 34,500-seat stadium and shifting to Newtown Park, which has 1000 seats, no floodlights, and limited parking.”

I called it right last Thursday when our answer to Sir Alex Fergusson invoked his novel marketing tactic of calling Phoenix supporters thick just for wanting them to win a game.  When Morgan said on Radio Sport that a “more attractive, possession-based passing style, was required for success in the long-term”.

I said:

“No, not if you a). Not have any fans, b). right-size to a public park to fit attendance and c). have decent players avoiding your LOSER team like the plague.”

It turns out Option B was right on the button according to the Dom Post.  Read more »

Saturday General Debate

Good morning and welcome to the Saturday general debate. There’s been some dimwitted shenanigans this week, with Gareth Morgan dominating the headlines for the dumbest of reasons by alienating cat owners and of course fans of the Wellington Phoenix. There has also been debate surrounding the cabinet reshuffle with the return of Nelson MP Nick Smith and the promotion of Nikki Kaye, making way for them were Phil Heatly and and Kate Wilkinson.

The gay marriage debate is heating up again, featuring plenty of times this week with Colin Craig kicking off his year with his controversial comments that society is right to discriminate against gay relationships.

Of course as always the topic is open for debate, go for your lives.

Peeling_Out

Mad Morgan now wants to exterminate Phoenix Fans

Not content with giving those left in his under-performing KiwiSaver fund reasons to ditch it, New Zealand’s foremost economist, philanthropist, soccer coach extraordinaire, feeder of orca and killer of cats, Gareth Morgan, has decided to shoot his other foot off.

The customer is always right Gareth? Apparently not with Morgan who has labelled Phoenix fans “pathetic” and unsophisticated because they want their team to stop being the A-League’s ‘open goal’.

If only the Dom Post had their sports writers doing the news because they would blow Kim DotCon sky high but then again, the sports writers got this by that time honoured tradition of listening to Radio Sport:

“The A-League club’s co-owner, who has admitted in the past that his football knowledge is limited, has also claimed that many fans “don’t know much about the game anyway” and are only thinking about themselves, rather than the long-term viability of the club.”

Good one Gareth. After wanting to exterminate half of your fan’s pets, you now call them drongos for paying good money in other to see their (or rather ‘your’) team get thrashed. You should become a motivational speaker:

“Morgan let rip at fans for wanting “instant gratification”. He said the club’s change in football philosophy, to a more attractive, possession-based passing style, was required for success in the long-term.

No, not if you a). Not have any fans, b). right-size to a public park to fit attendance and c). have decent players avoiding your LOSER team like the plague.

The DomPost says the Phoenix have struggled with this shift, “bizarrely implemented mid-season, and are last”.

Maybe someone ought to remind Morgan what Wellington said of the French after Waterloo (the last time the French put up a decent scrap), “They came on in the same old way and we defeated them in the same old way:”

“But Morgan said they would not be reverting back to their former style, which was based on solid defence and getting balls into the box from the flanks, for the sake of results. Fans would have to put up with “short-term pain”. The bigger picture is far, far more important than the short term,” he said”.

Sir John Kirwan should now send the Blues wooden spoon to the Hurricanes’ Mark Hammett (who must be searching for a new role) given St Gareth used his gains from flogging ‘his’ fund to KiwiBank, to get a slice of the Canes.

I pity the punters who pay money for merchandise, tickets or even, buying a sponsor’s product:

“All some people do is look at the league tables and that’s all there is to the game for them. Well, they’re pathetic really.”

Then again, Gareth threw a wobbly at Morningstar for calling a spade a spade on this erratic clown’s KiwiSaver Fund. St Gareth doesn’t like league tables indeed he is allergic to them maybe because it is about accountability.

“People expect instant gratification or gain with no pain. It’s just pathetic really. I can’t think of any activity where you change like that and there’s not a short-term cost as you go through the changes.”

How about your philanthropic trips abroad, TV appearances, mad schemes to ensure we get overrun by rats and stoats, spending vast sums to fatten up Penguins, calling farmers ‘retards’ and wanting to form Gareth Morgan Farmers to rival Feds. That sounds a lot like “instant gratification” to me.

But he is not done. He goes onto trash the Club’s few remaining supporters as ‘thick’ and somehow thinks ‘his way’ will attract a new wave of supporters. Yeah the opposition to see how much they’ll win by. Can I humbly suggest he actually leaves the coaches to coach and the players to play:

“Fans are a cross section of the public, you know. A lot of them don’t know much about the game anyway and certainly, in my view, think only of themselves, not about the future of the club. This club has got a whole lot of stuff to do in order to be sustainable, and that’s what we’re going to do.”

This little angry man has a Caesar complex. Maybe we should introduce him to Michael Williams in Auckland – I think they would get on like a house on fire.

I never thought I would write this but “Bring back Terry”.

Penguin politics fails the Phoenix

The man who famously fattened up a penguin for a lucky orca is now causing the Phoenix to crash and burn.

Gareth Morgan clearly has so little to do, that his expertise as an economist is now morphing into professional coaching and sports psychology.

It’s always the way – Morgan goes to extreme lengths  to “save” a penguin, then he drops it into southern ocean with a tracker, where it is never heard from again.  Read more »

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Gareth Morgan is a sanctimonious prick

Gareth Morgan and Conor English slugged it out on Country99TV about pollution:

OK, so it is Gareth’s world view but since he has just purchased a slice of the ‘Canes and as international aviation spirits are excluded from both taxation and the ETS, which Mr Morgan is a massive fan of, will he dig into his deep pockets and voluntarily pay the emissions his teams use travelling to games (Phoenix and now the Hurricanes)?

How about voluntarily paying the tax given he has a social conscience about?

Presumably, as he believes in social equality, he will also pay the real cost of stadiums rather than letting rate and taxpayers subsidise him to be one of the boys.  Yeah Right!

I see the Green Taliban are sticking their jowls up Mr Morgan’s cheeks on Twitter – judging by traffic at the Federated Farmers site from some right royal pinko slime.

Tell me then, what do they reckon about the carbon pumped out by eco-crusading, sport team owning twat?

I envy people like Morgan for doing well, I really do, but I spew when they turn around and suck on the tit of ratepayers with their sport teams, then get holier than thou about others trying  to earn a crust.