Pork Chop

Gotcha! and WOBH  have been leaked these exclusive emails between Herald on Sunday staffers Rachel “Pork Chop” Glucina and Carolyne “Minger” Meng-Yee.

Minger; Yo Pork? Nice column today, fucking loved it sister. Irish needs a peg down. Dang chick too hot at present.

Pork: yep twas a good one Mum and Henri loved it, took us three hours to write but (Richard) Worth it baby! We run Aucks.

Minger; yep but next time you are at my house make sure you leave the door open. Mike’s having trouble getting past the fold out to the bedroom. Big jumpn. Pulled hammy last time, out of action for 3 weeks. You know how much I like Valentine’s Day. Comin up. He still brings home da bacon and you like eatin’ it. Cool.

Pork; cool as beatch. Drew had issues parking in the garage, bit hard to get by the wheelie bins. May have knocked neighbourz ova. Sorry.

Minger; you reckon I could be the new HOS editor? They rckon B1 is in running, fark Drinnan interview da keyboard. He’s ed I’m in for chop aren’t I?

Pork: well Drew’s trying hard beatch as Shayne was so good 2 us, liked the chocolate cakes, Valentine’s got me dat new show on TVNZ. Peaking baby. We r hot. Today HOS 2moro da TV. Promise to look afta u gfriend. Stick close, I’m on up!

Minger; heard anything from Mollies lately about town?

Pork: Nah, not since H’s got it up the chook from Jack. Saza to shut it about town, not good about the 8′s. They visited last week.

Minger; oh, ok den. Cool az. Don’t wanna upset Holmesy, bit bad bout the carpark thing, who da fuck is dis Whaleoil?

Pork: no worries, I will sort him out Chopping style. Andre Giant and all. Fuck ‘em. Tracking his facebook.

Minger; so who ya doing l8ly baby? Sure in ur powa u could get a man?

Pork: I rckon Brooke is in4 it lately baby. Needs the pubz now he’s in retail. I thought he owned da bar?

Minger; yep good story there. I reckon Val. Day we need a catch up. Come round, tell Drewsta to pick you up at 10. Have friends over for the Valentine so need to be on B. behaviour.

Pork: O for it keep it coming, high five for low rise. Mike’s a sweetie really, u r so lucky. Keep it comin’

Minger: reckon Ali’s up for it! Fark. Chicks for life, if she’s hopping it I tell you what, Mike V’s on kerb. I’d put leg ova!!

Pork: yep, she’s got great legs, I’d be up for it! Who wouldn’t turn da curner for dat?

Minger: l8r. Shakespeare Wed 8pm!xxx

Pork: yep c u there.xxx”

My spies have been busy and have at last found Pork Chop aka Rachel Glucina. She is in Thailand.

Pork Chop found in Thailand

So a huge fuss was made about a big sky rocket, so much fuss that even Pork Chop was flown in by Heli-crane.

From the moment I boarded the chopper at Mechanics Bay on Sunday with my friend Paul Holmes and Labour MP David Shearer, it was the sentiment most often repeated.

Ok so we know that is a lie right there as there is no way a chopper could have taken off with all that weight on board let alone adding David Shearer and Paul Holmes.

The interesting thing here though is that David Shearer was going along for the trip to Mercury Island. Now that is some way from Mt Albert so either David Shearer has a fetish for rockets and was looking at ways of integrating them into his plan for a privatised NZ Army or there was something else behind his trip to the Island.

Of course they were all going to Sir Michael Fay’s place, Pork Chop’s good friend (yeah right), so perhaps that is the real interesting part of the story that has been missed.

Sir Michael has been known to be a good, good friend of Labour in the past, could it be perhaps that he is financing David Shearers bid to take over from Goff when the time is right?

Sir Michael Fay famously had a brass plaque on his desk in his Auckland Office that said “Nothing for Nothing, Fuck you”.

One wonders what the something for something is?  Because clearly David Shearer didn’t get the fuck you part otherwise he wouldn’t have been there.

Interesting times ahead all.

Another ridiculous tender.

Clearly OnTrack hasn’t heard of opensource software OpenOffice which would be essentially free and can output documents in pdf format automatically without the need for any other expensive software ripoffs like Microsoft Office.

Ever heard of Open Office?

Brad Shipton, serial pack rapist, is being released early from jail after serving less than three years of his 8 and half year sentence.

He is able to get out early because Labour believes in cuddling criminals rather than locking them up.

A vote for Labour is a vote to let pack rapists out early.

Shawn Tan’s lawyer Max Whitehead was interviewed by bFM. It is a very telling interview and during the interview we find out that Andrew Little lied in his email to ALL members and we find that The Standard have also lied because Shawn Tan has met, with Max Whitehead, prior to todays meeting when they first suspended Shawn Tan.

Listen here

This is certainly a ramshackle PR fiasco for the bastard bosses at the EPMU.

[quote]Authorities in the northern Malaysian city of Kota Baru have forbidden Muslim women from wearing bright lipstick and noisy high-heeled shoes to work, saying the ban will enhance their dignity and prevent them from getting raped.[/quote]

- as if its somehow their fault if they do get raped!

Funny how the lefties never complain about this shit. What is it with fundy Islamists that htey blame all actions against women on women?