A younger looking face looking back at you in the mirror has some appeal I must admit. What about a face that that is completely unrecognisable? What is is like for the families and partners of today’s face of the day, the plastic surgery altered face? We often discuss the pros and cons of getting ‘ work done’ but we rarely consider the effects of a new face on those who love us. Isn’t our face a huge part of our identity? Is this one of the risks of plastic surgery that no one considers or talks about?
At University I had it out with a number of lecturers who insisted that there was such a thing as positive discrimination. They argued that quotas for Women or for Maori would address imbalance in certain professions and therefore magically became acceptable.
I argued that discrimination is wrong when it is against Women and Maori and it is equally wrong against European Men.There is nothing Positive about it.
The best person for the job should get it. As a woman it is insulting to me to think that I might be selected for my sex rather than because I was the best person for the job. I would not accept an employer not selecting me solely because I was a woman, anymore than I would accept being given a job solely because I was a woman.
Today is Feral Free Friday, but that doesn’t mean we can’t talk about the pervading culture of “being offended”.
We have seen yesterday Metiria Turei, cloaked in in her shield of sanctimony claiming that this sentence is racist:
“I’m actually insulted to be lectured about how out of touch I am with average New Zealand by a list MP who has no constituents, lives in a castle and comes to the House in $2000 designer jackets and tells me I’m out of touch,”
This post is not about that comment precisely that is for one at 0830. Rather is shows the pervading culture of some segments of our society to become offended or outraged over what are really just a few words.
In Metiria Turei’s case the racism is in her mind. There is not a single mention or race, or maori in those few words by Anne Tolley and yet Metiria Turei reaches for the racism claim.
Likewise the so-called “tough” coasters were upset to the point of issuing death threats, rape threats, violence threats on the basis of 8 words in a headline, nevermind the post actually focussed on media portrayal of a police chase. A reporter from a Greymouth newspaper with less readers than read this website in an hour fuelled the outrage by the portrayal that the whole article was aimed at the young man who died. Just 8 words and my death is called for.
These same people are now writing to people who book ads through Google in an attempt to hurt me financially. These coaster aren’t tough, they are thin-skinned bullies bred on a diet of entitle-itis and a good dose of feral outrage.
We saw a similar behaviour with Willie and JT…outrage cascading into threats, financial attacks and bullying. Radio Live caved to the bullying on social media, more fool them. They are now exposed as a soft target, because bullies always pick on the weak.
Where does this come from?
Well I believe it comes from what is loosely termed “political correctness”…or asÂ Chet Beates defined inÂ Son of a GunÂ : The Life and Times of a Lifer BratÂ (2007):
A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.
Who can read a woman? Anyone? Thought so. It has now been proven that it is actually impossible to do it anyway, let alone read the bunny boilers out there.
Men found it twice as hard to guess a womanâ€™s mood than a manâ€™s after being shown pictures of peopleâ€™s eyes and estimating how they were feeling, researchers found.
However, the study showed that it is not because of menâ€™s lack of trying – the male volunteers were given brain scans while they looked at the pictures, and the data suggested an unusual reason for the difficulty in reading womenâ€™s feelings.Â Read more »
Shane KoyczanÂ has created an anti-bullying project called To This Day.
My experiences with violence in schools still echo throughout my life but standing to face the problem has helped me in immeasurable ways.
To This Day Project is a project based on a spoken word poem written by Shane Koyczan called â€śTo This Dayâ€ť, to further explore the profound and lasting impact that bullying can have on an individual.Â Read more »
We have already called for David Farrar to hand in his man card. Now we can be certain he lacks the requiredÂ manlinessÂ to claim it back. He has posted his blouse score on Facebook:
Now either he was being overly politically correct in his answers or he lied like a flatfish, because there is no way in hell he would have scores that low. Especially the hostile sexism. If he did then he would be a happily married man and wouldÂ haveÂ been so for ages.
For the record my scores were:Â Read more »
I have watched with incredulity the building outrage against two radio show hosts who played a prank and who have subsequently have been blamed for a nurse taking her own life.
I have had screaming arguments with friends and family over this very issue in the past two days as they gleeful seek “revenge” against the radio hosts. Some have even suggested the best thing they could do is end their own lives…missing the irony of the situation in their outrage.
Now some will suggest I am a heartless bastard for even suggesting that nothing should be done. But consider this, as I have done, from another perspective.
We are far to quick to lay blame and seek explanation from people for wrong that happen in life. If we can blame then we can wash our hands of guilt, or somehow make ourselves feel better that despite a desperate situation for one person that there is someone to blame.
This is erroneous thinking…and one unfortunately conditioned into us with the advent of the all knowing and caring state…where things happen but it is ok because someone else is to blame and the state will fix it. It is rubbish thinking.
From my perspective I have much happen in my life that I could have taken my own life…and people would have been able to point the finger at someone else.
I could have killed myself when my business failed…and people could have blamed my thieving business partner.
I could have killed myself when in the darkness of depression…and people could have blamed the medication, the treatment, or indeed depression itself.
I could have killed myself when Fidelity Life unilaterally ended my claim against all medical advice causing me to lose our house, essentially impoverishing me, unable to fight themÂ throughÂ lack of funds…and then someone could have blamed the insurance company.
I could have killed myself when I was coming off the medication I was forced to take so that an insurance company to have the proper forms filled out…because the only way to deal with depression is to take drugs apparently…and then blamed the same insuranceÂ companyÂ and the drugÂ companiesÂ for the evil side effects.
I could have killed my self when the Herald on Sunday ran a nasty story about me….and then Kathryn Powley would have been blamed for ending my life.
I could have killed myself in the dark days of despair and loneliness that I felt in the days after my mother died.
And I could have killed myself in dealing with aÂ psychopathic, vexatious litigant intent on causing me as much financial harm as possible…who even sent lettersÂ demanding my appearance in courtÂ the day my mother died saying it was tough she was ill but too bad he would show any consideration…and then he could have been blamed as well.
These are just a few of the incidences in recent years where contemplating ending it has entered my thoughts. Quite literally there are hundreds of nasty emails, voicemail messages and texts that have come my way in the years I have been blogging that are far worse than a prank call from a radio station that I too could have used as an excuse to end my life…some of those messages actually tell me it would be best if I killed myself.
Even today I am worth more dead than alive. I still struggle with depression and dark thoughts are never far away. I have not killed myself because…well I don’t really know why I haven’t…other than own personal beliefs around the issue, and that no matter how dark and awful things get I always seem to be able to see some hope. I certainly gave up blaming anyone else a long time ago.
But…as this story unfolds in the UK and Australia I find myself wondering why no one is looking at the actual person responsible.
The only person responsible for the ending through self harm of ones life is the person who actually kills themselves. Suicide is one of the most selfish, self centred, egotistical acts of violence that we see. It isn’t a cry for help it is a final…well look at what I did then.
Until we confront suicide and deal with it in a realistic manner then we will all continue to lay the blame at the wrong feet.
If we are to say that the radio host are responsible then what we are saying is that no media, not print, not radio, not television should ever interview, speak with or indeed prank with anyone until they have seen a full mental health certificate of the intended interviewee or prank victim.
It is flawed thinking to blame anyone else other than the person who killed themselves. No one can ever know theÂ mentalÂ health status of any person they are talking to…to now attribute blame is flawed logic and will not assist in any way, shape or form in understanding and dealing with suicide.
We need to grow up and stop reacting so emotively.
In commenting on this post please try and look logically and pragmatically at the issue rather than rush to silly emotive rantings.
According to some the internet provides browsers with a death spiral into procrastination and indolence.
Doghouse Diaries understands the webâ€™s tight grip, and has illustrated the familiar browsing cycle in handy flowchart form. Check, recheck, refresh, repeat.
With the bewildered, the aged, and the mentally infirm turning out for NZ First there must be some reason why. Perhaps this it?
In 1954, a Chicago housewife, Dorothy Martin, started receiving messages from the planet Clarion. The aliens seized control of her hand, and through the medium of â€śautomatic writingâ€ť she issued startling prophecies. The bad news: on the night of December 21, the world would be destroyed in a flood. The good news: Dorothy and her followers would be lifted to safety by a flying saucer.
Poor Dorothy! Not only did the flood and the spaceship fail to materialise, but it turned out that her cult had been infiltrated by social psychologists. They were busy taking notes as she and her followers desperately tried to explain what had gone wrong. Curiously, some true believers became more fervent despite being made to look like fools.
Leon Festinger, the head researcher, used this finding to build a whole theory of â€ścognitive dissonanceâ€ť in his book When Prophecy Fails. His work explains why, when true believers are made to look ridiculous by events, most of them stick their fingers in their ears and act as if nothing has happened. But a few go even more nuts than they were in the first place. Itâ€™s their coping strategy.
The mainstream media show an edited version of this video of a small chinese girl being run over twice and left to die in the street as bystanders walk on by.
I will not show an edited version. Doing nothing is not an option. Warning, what you will see is appalling.
Doing Nothing, as happens in this video even has aÂ technicalÂ name. Andrew Sullivan explainsÂ in a post that was unrelated to the emergence of this video but oh so appropriate for the circumstances.
A new studyÂ offersÂ an alternative take on the bystander effect. Also known as Genovese Syndrome, it was named for Catherine Susan Genovese who was stabbed to death in 1964 despite the fact that some people supposedly saw and heard her being attacked:
In situations where thereâ€™s a clear threatâ€”when someone is trying to extinguish a raging car fire, rather than merely struggling to change a flat tireâ€”the bystander effect actually diminishes. â€śItâ€™s counterintuitive,â€ť says [Brown psychology professor Joachim Krueger]Â . â€śAs the costs of a behavior become higher, you should be less likely to help.â€ť Why thatâ€™s not so lies deep in our lizard brains. We know danger when we see it, and when we do, it induces higher levels of arousal and, therefore, more propensity to help.
In this instance in China though the Bystander Effect was in full force. People simply carried on regardless. It is the same mentality that sees child abuse go unreported. Doing nothing is not an option.
WARNING: Graphic images
UPDATE: The girl has died.