Toby Manhire


Toby Manhire says John Campbell’s style is irreplaceable.

When news broke six weeks ago that Campbell Live was on the chopping block the response was genuinely astonishing. This wasn’t just your garden-variety social media outrage – huge numbers of people were properly pissed off, they took it personally.

I felt a bit sorry, even, for MediaWorks bosses, who found themselves copping heaps of flak. Some of it they deserve (and yesterday’s announcement, two minutes before Bill English began reading the Budget, was cynical and unbecoming), but at least as much would have been better hurled at politicians from both major parties who had allowed public service television to become all but extinct.

Oh come on…the media hate politicians doing the Friday dump…and when it suits them they use it themselves.

John Campbell’s mix of acuity, tenacity and integrity is irreplaceable. His work in leading campaigns on school lunches, in disaster relief, and especially in remaining tirelessly focused on Christchurch, when most outside the region had stopped paying much attention, adds up to a formidable legacy.

It is hard to overstate how keenly he’ll be missed by colleagues, too: everyone from those in the mailroom through to senior journalists at TV3 speaks glowingly about Campbell’s willingness to stop and talk, to mentor the next generation of bushy-tailed reporters.

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Nobody throws their mates under the bus like the left

On Friday Rachel Glucina broke the news that Phil Kitchin, the former premier investigative journalist at Fairfax, was working for Paula Bennett now.

My word haven’t the left and media luvvies turned on him.

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Toby Manhire wants us to follow in Denmark and Sweden’s footsteps.

Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it. Toby Manhire is such a person. Rather than do what Churchill did when he joined England in the fight against Nazism he thinks that a more gutsy decision would be to increase our immigration, thereby bringing into our democratic country the very ideology that John Key wants us to oppose.

Sweden and Denmark increased their immigration and look what happened.

Woe to anyone in Sweden who dissents from the orthodox view that welcoming large numbers of indigent peoples from such countries as Iraq, Syria, and Somalia is anything but a fine and noble idea. Even to argue that permitting about 1 percent of the existing population to emigrate annually from an alien civilization renders one politically, socially, and even legally beyond the pale. (I know a journalist threatened with arrest for mild dissent on this issue.) Stating that there exists a Swedish culture worth preserving meets with puzzlement. And yet, the realities of immigration are apparent for all to see: welfare dependency, violent bigotry against Christians and Jews, and a wide range of social pathologies from unemployment to politically motivated rape. Accordingly, ever-increasing numbers of Swedes find themselves — despite known hazards — opting out of the consensus and worrying about their country’s cultural suicide.

All this is part, say critics, of a decade-long transformation in Denmark’s approach to immigration and integration, under pressure from the populist Danish People’s party, the DPP… Denmark’s Muslim population are the party’s particular focus. There are many Muslims, it says, who are unwilling to integrate and hostile to “Danish values” such as free speech.

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Braunias has a new book, and I’m in it, but the cheap bastard never sent me one

Steve Braunias is a good bastard, for a pinko scumbag I really like the guy.

I’ve probably ruined his lefty credentials now, but hey…who cares.

The other night he launched his book called Madmen: Inside the weirdest election campaign ever.

I had to laugh at the name of his publisher, Steve obviously got his inspiration for the name from my good friend Brian Edwards.

God knows where you can buy the book, but if you track it down enjoy the read…the cheap bastard didn’t even send me one despite the fact I’m in it!

I emailed Braunias too…which he loosely outlined in a blog post.Madmen

Following last night’s wildly successful book launch at the Auckland Central Library for Madmen: Inside the Weirdest Election Campaign Ever – 100 people in attendance, including Cactus Kate, Guyon Espiner, a homeless man in a top hat, Ant Timpson, Shayne Carter, two elderly people in advanced stages of dementia, Deborah Hill-Cone, Karl Puschmann, a man who displayed a dozen pieces of paper which he had thrown coffee onto, waited til the stains dried, and presented them as art, Gary Steel, Shayne Currie, Toby Manhire, Miriamo Kamo and her adorable three-year-old daughter, etc  – I came home to find an email from Whale Oil.

Actually, just to correct Steve and look for Nicky Hager, Cactus Kate went along.  Braunias confronted her at the entrance and said he didn’t invite her to which she replied “we often get what we don’t ask for” and proceed to sashay in the door to find the bar.  Nicky was nowhere in sight.

That is when all hell broke loose.    Read more »

Oh the outrage! John Key told a lame joke about a filthy pedo

The left wing are all enraged because John Key told a joke about the scumbag pedo who has fled the country to Chile and now on to Brazil.

Prime Minister John Key made a joke about fugitive Phillip John Smith, saying he would let Chile’s President know she may not want to “invite [him] round for lunch”.

Smith, who was jailed for life for murder and child abuse in 1996, flew to Chile using a passport obtained in his birth name – Phillip Traynor – while on temporary release from prison.

Chilean authorities have confirmed that Smith then took a flight to Brazil, but Mr Key was unaware of this when he made reference to the killer while at a press conference in Beijing yesterday.

He laughed as he told reporters he would alert Chilean President Michelle Bachelet about Smith when they meet at the Apec summit today.

“I’ll just let her know there’s someone who could be out there from New Zealand that you may not want to invite round for lunch.”

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Face of the day

Toby Manhire

Toby Manhire

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Herald and Bryce Edwards manufacturing news again

Bryce Edwards is always one of the first to climb into me…on almost anything, like most sanctimonious commentators he should perhaps remove the log from his own eyes.

Here he was two nights ago begging for bloggers to write hit pieces against the National party.

So there wasn’t any copy for him to use on his chosen topic so he went out and begged for it…to create the impression that there was over confidence and arrogance amongst National. He had nothing..and so begged for copy. And so his dutiful obedient left wing followers all piled in to help him with his column.



Bryce Edwards was then able to announce his column yesterday..which was on guess what?    Read more »

Snapper or GCSB – Manhire explains

The left wing continues to unhinge themselves over the GCSB, thinking wrongly that this is of major concern to Kiwi voters. It isn’t.

Smarter lefty commentators are starting to realise this too late. Toby Manhire explains in simple words for those struggling with understanding that John Campbell is wrong.

The alchemists in the National Party were at it again over the weekend, turning a slap in the face with a snapper into a brave stand for ordinary, hard-fishing New Zealanders.

The news that recreational fishers might have bag limits slashed to three went down like a seafood milkshake. But, somehow, that uncharacteristic cock-up was turned into a rhetorical tactic, defence into attack.

The Government out of touch? On the contrary: they had heard snapper-catchers’ concerns. They knew it mattered. Mattered, unlike, say, that GCSB sideshow. The revision of the role of the Government Communications Security Bureau was of interest to pointy-heads and “beltway” nerds alone.

The exuberant twenty-something National MP Jami-Lee Ross summed up the pivot neatly. “Liberal elite shouldn’t get so outraged,” he said. “I have 20 times more emails about snapper than I do about GCSB. That’s what NZers actually care about.”

Real people care about snapper. And if you cared about the redefining of GCSB powers you were a tedious liberal elitist who couldn’t tell a rig from a jig.  Read more »

What are the pinkos saying about John Campbell’s caning?

Last night John Key turned up for what John Campbell thought would be another corngate interview, instead John Key played with him like a cat plays with a mouse. In the end all John campbell had was bluster, ranting and arrogance and even that failed him.

Don’t believe me, go watch it.

Still don’t believe me…have a look at what the saner parts of the leftwing twitterati are saying:

Toby Manhire had to concede:

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Toby Manhire on Colin Craig

The old adage that any publicity is good publicity might not actually be true. Toby Manhire writes:

“Colin Craig” is New Zealand’s answer to Ali G. “Colin Craig” is a fictional character, a circus clown, a satirical device. When you think about it, it’s as unmistakable as the sparkle in his eye. Would a real person say “at the end of the day” at the start of every second sentence?

The penny dropped this week when “Colin Craig” went one step too far, the cheeky monkey, issuing a legal threat via what appeared to be a reputable legal firm demanding that a little-known but obviously satirical website, The Civilian, retract an obviously satirical remark attributed to him.


An aspiring MP screaming defamation over an innocuous bit of obvious satire? I don’t think so. A millionaire demanding a $500 contribution to legal costs from a 21-year-old just out of university? Inconceivable.

The political stupidity of Colin Craig is astonishing.

If “Colin Craig” were real, would he be so lacking in wit, confidence and courage as to issue stiff ultimatums to a tiny website run by a pipsqueak in his pyjamas, while letting stand for all time homoerotic imaginings – all “powerful thighs” and “firm buttocks” – attributed to him in a “secret diary” published by newspapers across the country? I don’t think so.

And even if “Colin” did get puffed up like a peacock, sensible lawyers would gently talk him out of it. Wouldn’t they?

There’s more evidence that this man of many first names is a giant tease. The thundering legal letter observes that the article in question – headlined “Maurice Williamson looking pretty stupid after floods” – includes words that their client “never made”. It splutters: “It is a fiction created by you to make him look ridiculous”.

Snort! The letter continues: “The statement cannot be dismissed as satire in the circumstances, particularly when it is published alongside quotes from Maurice Williamson which we understand may largely be accurate.”

Wonderful! As any half-awake intern could have told them, the quotes from Williamson are invented, too. As is the one attributed to John Key, calling Williamson “a big idiot”.

In case that weren’t enough, the lawyer’s letter goes on to refer to “words which were not said by Mr Crag”. As if a legal firm with such a proud history and so many bright minds would misspell its own client’s name. Are they all in on this delicious charade? Bravo.

Heh, the man of many first names.

Who, then, is pulling the strings and our legs? Is “Colin Cra(i)g” conjured up by the same genius behind the long-running cabaret act John “Cabbage Boat” Banks? Is he a guerrilla-marketing stunt by enfant terrible Ben Uffindel – a kind of Pantomime Trojan Horse to attract attention to his fledgling comedy website?

Is he an automaton, controlled by Steven Joyce, deployed to distract attention from this week’s bewildering Albanian-Stalinist-North-Korean-Polish shipyard metaphor incontinence?

Is he a Weta Workshop side project? Has he been 3D-printed by Maurice Williamson?

Disrobe, “Colin Craig”, we cry. Let us stand in ovation before this comedy masterwork, this colossus of ridiculous fiction. I suggest a special gong at the next Chapman Tripp Theatre Awards. Remove the latex mask, “Colin”. Enter our warm embrace

For you must be a character, a chimera, an invention. Mustn’t you? The alternative is too bizarre to contemplate.

Colin Craig is certainly way too bizarre to be trusted in parlimanet, but then again the voters are seeing that….he has spent the thick end of $3 million coming third.