Te Qaeda busted, Hone bin Laden in hiding in Te Urewera

Napalm bomb detonated at alleged training camp – report (+ photos) – 15 Oct 2007 – NZ Herald: New Zealand National news

The news over a few greens and maori apparently plotting to attack the government is just a little bizzare. Even more bizzare when you consider that one of the excuses being proffered is that Clark's life was in danger. What complete bollocks.

For a start she leaves tomorrow morning for more chin wagging in her attempt to get the world to take sides on Fiji and for another thing, who in the hell is ever going to recognise the real Helen Clark when this is the image we constantly get bombarded with. I mean I have heard of face transplants but this is going way over the top in a bid to make sure no one recognises you.
In fact I think it is a cunning SIS plan to make sure that we have no idea you the real Clark is, kind of like Saddam Hussein and his doppelgangers. Think about it, there isn't one picture of Clark in the media that is the same as the next and non of then look like her official visage. Sounds at least plausible to me.

Now onto the hunt for Hone bin Laden. Last heard of in a crackly tape and seen on an equally poorly filmed video smuggled out of the remote Te Urewera, Hone bin Laden is believed to be the mastermind behind the nefarious Te Qaeda terror network. His deputy Al al-Harawherearewe
The group has been defined as "a radical Sunny Maori umbrella organization established to recruit young Maori into the Tuhoe maori-jahideen and is aimed to establish Maorist states throughout the hinterland, overthrow ‘un-Maori regimes’, expel Western influence from New Zealand, and capture Opotiki as a Maori city. Te Qaeda's objectives include the end of European influence in Maori countries such as Tuhoe, Ngati porou and Tuwharetoa and the creation of a new Maori sovreignty. Reported beliefs include that a Green-Maori alliance is conspiring to destroy Helen Clark, and that in maori-jihad the killing of bystanders and civilians is justified. Its management philosophy has been described as "centralization of decision and decentralization of execution. Characteristic terror techniques include use of balaclavas and jalopies to diguise attacks as those of the Mongrel mob and Black power.

Powered by ScribeFire.

Do you want:

  • Ad-free access?
  • Access to our very popular daily crossword?
  • Access to daily sudoku?
  • Access to Incite Politics magazine articles?
  • Access to podcasts?
  • Access to political polls?

Our subscribers’ financial support is the reason why we have been able to offer our latest service; Audio blogs. 

Click Here  to support us and watch the number of services grow.

As much at home writing editorials as being the subject of them, Cam has won awards, including the Canon Media Award for his work on the Len Brown/Bevan Chuang story. When he’s not creating the news, he tends to be in it, with protagonists using the courts, media and social media to deliver financial as well as death threats.

They say that news is something that someone, somewhere, wants kept quiet. Cam Slater doesn’t do quiet and, as a result, he is a polarising, controversial but highly effective journalist who takes no prisoners.

He is fearless in his pursuit of a story.

Love him or loathe him, you can’t ignore him.

To read Cam’s previous articles click on his name in blue.