April 2011

Thanks MMP

So Hone is going to resign and force a by-election, and he announced his party and list of fellow travelers today.

Hone Harawira has sent a bill of more than $500,000 tot he government so he can prove a point. Think how many homes in Te Tai Tokerau could have had their insulation upgraded for that amount. How many stop smoking campaigns that Hone Harawira bangs on about endlessly could have been run in Te Tai Tokerau for $500,000. How many food parcels and emergency grants could maori in Te Tai Tokerau have availed themselves of for $500,000.

As is usual with socialists they think of themselves first before anyone else.

If the Maori Party were smart they would not stand anyone in the by-election and help Kelvin Davis win the seat. Same goes for National. They should all get together and run anyone but Hone campaign and make the anyone Kelvin Davis.

The so-called Mana party are nothing nothing short of a collection of un-reconstituted communists, anarchists, racist loonies that appeal to people like that awful Bomber Bradbury. They are not even remotely close in actions to the name of their party.

Thanks MMP: Reject MMP

Will National Call a Snap Election?

PM having kittensThe smartest political brain in the country is, well, out of the country, having gone appropriately gaga over the royal wedding. Apparently the polls said this was a good move, and the National party machine follows the polls so closely they even poll to see whether anyone knows what a principle is these days.

With the PM out of the country there has been some talk that National might call a snap election. These rumours are coming through the tip line and are currently being verified, but this would go contrary to the control freak approach to campaigning that National’s team have developed a well earned reputation for.

Doubt remains about whether anyone will make a decision before the PM gets back. Sources inside the beehive are saying that National does not have a game plan prepared for a snap election so there are a number of people having kittens at the moment.

Media will get a good steer on whether there will be a snap election by attending the next three regional conferences. If the campaign team present at the conference there is a good indication that they are not in the war room starting a campaign but meandering towards 26th November, unable to shrug off the straight jacket that is a rigid, inflexible plan.

As readers may expect the tip line is running hot, and verifying all this information is taking time.

Special Announcement

It will have escaped no-one, least of all regular readers that I now have a good collection of hunting equipment. I have needed to return to my favourite hobby for my own peace of mind and that is shooting. Without blowing my own trumpet I am bloody good at it.

To that end, Whaleoil Publishing in conjunction with I need a Deer Block Ltd announces the published date of its first book, “The Confessions of a Political Groupie

A kiss and tell expose from a woman on the inside. Telling the true story of the sordid sexual escapades of our members of parliament, their much vaunted morals and family values.

All politicians are fair game while in the house. Those who leave the public sphere are considered no longer in the public interest so anyone with a guilty conscience should retire gracefully before August 31st.

It will be Available Online, August 31st 2011

Excerpts will follow.


Citizen A – 28 April – Coup special

Citizen A this week with that awful Bomber Bradbury and editor of Scoop.co.nz, Selwyn Manning

Issue one: Brash launches an Auckland attack against Hide in most aggressive take over since Germany invaded Poland

Issue two: John Banks in Epsom? Why has God forsaken Epsom?

Issue three tonight: Metro Magazine has an outstanding investigative journalism story on allegations of SAS handing civilians over for torture. In the week we celebrated ANZAC Day, what are we doing in Afghanistan?

Gummed by a Nana

Cactus Kate thinks Fran(k) O’Sullivan has smashed me up. The reality is it is more like a bad gum job from a nana.

Fran O’Sullivan along with almost all the old traditional media stuck in the beltway and sitting behind desks enlarging their arses on fat salaries and corporate expense cards simply got out played by Don Brash and his strategy team.

From the get go of this coup it was clear that the old school was not involved and neither was anyone in the beltway, and yet who did the media darling and luvvies run to for comment or finger (excuse the metaphor) for being behind the coup….that’s right…beltway commentators and old school politicians.

In her article Fran(k) all but names Matthew Hooton as the coup-meister…except Hooton was frantically ringing all and sundry, including me, trying to find out what was happening so he could work for the actual people who pay him, iPredict. He was no more involved than Michelle Boag, another bogey-man that the media were desperate to be included in the coup who was patently not involved. If you look at all the commentary, with the exception of TV3 most of then are sheer figments of their keyboards or David Farrars furtive imagination. Even the liars and anonymous lap-bloggers at The Standard are desperate for Michelle Boag to be involved.

Not a single thing they said panned out, and not a single thing they said came true. Boag wasn’t involved, neither was Hooton, there were no mystery bag men bank-rolling Brash. They got it all wrong, sitting their behind their desks in Wellington, interviewing their keyboards.

Given that they and Fran(k) especially got it so wrong then why should be believe her on this. She is acting like a bitter old crone upset she got beaten to the story by a lowly (beneath her) blogger. The hilarious thing about all this is that Fran(k) resorted to asking to be my FB friend in the middle of all this…now I know why…she wanted to keep up with the action.

It’s called working sources deary, you should know that. She can join Cluster Farrar and have her very own nickname “Cluster Fran”.

That wasn’t an attack on me it was a gum job from a nana.

Citizen A – 21 April

Citizen A from 21 April 2011 with blogger Phoebe Fletcher and that awful Bomber Bradbury

Issue one: Hang on, help is on its way – John Key sings a different tune over helping Rodney in Epsom

Issue two: Steven Joyce finds ways to make life tough for students, but should we be making life more difficult and since when did education get downgraded to ‘nice to have’.

Issue three tonight: When the NZ Herald attacks the Government, you know something must be terribly wrong – why all the misuse of urgency under National??

Friday Firepower – AL391 Beretta Urika Classic

Since I won this gun at Hamills Duck Night it seems only fair to profile it. I will give a review following the run in and also after my 4 day Quail and Pheasant hunt coming up.

AL391 Urika Classic

AL391 Urika Basic


Full specifications (pdf)

from Beretta’s website:

Style, Elegance, Handling
It is elegant yet efficient. Sleek yet strong. With slim, graceful lines that leave an indelible impression at first sight, created by the internationally renowned design studio, Giugiaro Design. It is the product of a commitment to craftmanship and manufacturing excellence that has inspired Beretta’s endeavors for nearly 500 years. The new Beretta AL391 Urika, built to be the perfect hunter’s companion, has no competition; it is unrivaled.

Rounded Receiver
The skillfully rounded receiver blends perfectly with the stock grip. Besides its link to tradition, it also permits instinctive, rapid target acquisition.
The receiver was designed to enhance the overall slim profile of the shotgun. The top sighting surface features an anti-glare matte black finish that subtly contrasts with the polished finish sides.

Trigger Guard
The trigger guard, one of the most distinctive features of the Beretta semiautomatic shotgun, has a rounded shape that merges with the stock to ensure safe, fast access to the trigger itself. The enlarged opening allows the use of gloves.

The AL391 Urika’s select walnut stock is carefully fitted to the receiver for seamless wood-to-metal fit, giving it an appearance comparable to the most prestigious shotguns. A lengthened, radiused pistol grip, ergonomic comb and fine checkering ensure comfort and security for all hand sizes, as well as correct finger position on the trigger. The shouldering, the velocity in aiming, the marksmanship and the control of the shotgun have been optimized. The semi-gloss finish highlights the grain of the walnut wood, and waterproofing guarantees protection against harsh hunting conditions. A unique, simple system allows the length of the stock to be quickly adjusted using interchangeable recoil pads. Shooters can vary stock drop and cast to create a perfect match between gun and shooter. The spacers supplied with the gun can be used both for cast off and cast on.

The slim, fast-handling fore-end is ergonomically perfect and beautifully styled to blend with the receiver, curving into the shape of the locking cap. The AL391 Urika’s fine-cut checkering and new fluting afford easy pointing and a firm grip for all hand sizes.

Gas Valve Flange
The new fore-end gas valve directs the gas exhaust down and away from the shooter’s hand, while an internal protective sleeve insulates the wood from direct contact.

Cold Hammer-forged Barrel
In keeping with the Beretta tradition, the barrel is manufactured using the advanced cold hammer forging process and high strength Nickel-Chromium-Molybdenum steel. Beretta’s technological superiority and craftsmanship guarantee the precise concentricity of every barrel and uniform wall thickness, allowing the barrels to be remarkably light and strong. The exclusive hard-chromed bore ensures truer, more consistent shot patterns and resists pitting and corrosion. The slim receiver is formed from a high-strength alloy that is as strong as steel but 65% lighter. All surfaces are black anodized for corrosion and wear resistance.

Optima-Bore® Internal Barrel Configuration
On request, the 12 gauge Beretta semiautomatic can be supplied with Optima-Bore® barrels. Thanks to a lengthened forcing cone, it improves shot pattern distribution and felt recoil reduction. Specific fore-end required.

Optimachoke® Plus Tubes
They are supplied with the Optima-Bore® barrels. The Optimachoke® Plus tubes reduce shot deformation, enhance shot pattern distribution and concentration and permit the optimization of the barrels’ interior profile. They are designed to resist steel shot stress and assure long life.

Lightweight Receiver
The slim receiver is formed from a high-strength alloy that is as strong as steel but 65% lighter. All surfaces are anodized for corrosion and wear resistance.

Trigger Plate
Constructed from fiberglass-reinforced techno-polymer, the trigger plate offers many advantages: self-lubrication to reduce maintenance; vibration absorption; dimensional stability ensuring consistent mating with the receiver; light weight; thermal stability for improved “feel” in cold weather; excellent color retention on a part typically subject to wear and abuse.

Self-compensating Gas Valve
The innovative design of the AL391 Urika gas-compensating valve has taken the operating limits of the
gas-operated shotgun to new levels. This “all load” capability allows for flawless functioning with all types of ammunition, from the weakest 7/8 oz. (24 g) load to the heaviest 2 oz. (57g). With a minimum barrel length of 28″ (71 cm) even subsonic load functioning is assured. The unique system vents excess gases to eliminate stress on the operating system and component parts when using heavy loads, extending the life of the shotgun. The new valve and spring assembly remains attached to the barrel, ensuring easy assembly and disassembly and reducing maintenance. The reduced dimensions of the entire mechanism contribute to the slim, elegant fore-end shape.

After putting some rounds down range or into some birds I’ll let you know how it shoots. So far I am really pleased though and I especially like the price point for me. Still at $1999 RRP I think there is certainly a lot of gun for your bucks.

It hefts well and swings nicely. I’m left-handed but am pretty useful with semi-auto actions despite that. The multi-chokes is a real plus for me. The last shotgun I owned was quite some time ago and wasn’t really that flash. This is a smart looking gun, with some smart gear. Really looking forward to shooting again. It is so long since I blew some birds out of the sky.

Why rule anything in or out?

Sources inside the beehive are saying that Bill English is fighting a tough fight to get John Key to rule Don Brash out from Bills position as finance minister. Key is so far being too smart to commit, especially to save a guy like Bill who is well known to be useless at politics and has wasted billions running a spending policy that would make a Labour Finance Minister proud.

Prime Minister John Key said from Europe last night that he would “try and be constructive” and would not rule Dr Brash out of an executive role after the election.

But it was “highly unlikely” Dr Brash would be offered the jobs of deputy prime minister or finance minister.

The problem for John Key is that everyone knows Don is a deeply principled man. He will not sit by watching an intellectual lightweight with one years experience in treasury and a long career as house husband wreck New Zealand’s economy. So Key has to balance up the fragile ego that is the MP for Southland against having a proper finance minister who actually understands the economy.

Key also needs to work out what will happen in coalition negotiations if Don has ten MPs or fifteen MPs sitting behind him? Don is not a man you can put polling information in front of and say “this will cost us votes lets be all fuzzy and do nothing”. Don will run with his convictions, and it is not even worth wasting words on trying to convince him otherwise.

A Quote for Posterity and a new political word

From Farrar’s now famously inaccurate post Ends and Means:

I have been somewhat surprised at how amateurish the attempted ACT coup has been. In fact, I’d go further and say it somewhat resembles a cluster fuck. I’ll explain where I think mistakes were made, and what I would have done differently.

An urgent meeting of the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy has convened in the light of Don Brash taking over ACT, and David Farrar will no longer be allowed to be called Pinko, Manatee, Penguin or any other cutsie names he has earned over the last forty years. He will now only be known as “clusterf**k” or for the squeamish the approved alternative is “Clusterfarrar”

“Cluster Farrar” can also be used as a new word for the political lexicon to describe execrable political analysis.

cluster farrar definition

  1. -noun
    any political commentary that is execrable:  This goddamn blog post has been one long cluster farrar!
  2. -adjective
    very bad: a cluster farrar analysis.
  3. -adjective
    cluster fuck: a cluster farrar analysis.
  4. –adjective
    utterly detestable; abominable; abhorrent political commentary

Fun in Palmy

Will he ever learn?

The new Mangrove, Iain Lees-Galloway, the MP for Palmerston North and stenographer rooter has decided to try to wind up the National candidate Leonie Hapeta by parking his car across the road from her business. He got smacked around last time he was outside the hotel protesting with his nasty and  illegal sign protest, but didn’t seem to learn.

Iain Lees-Galloway roots stenographers

As mentioned previously this blogger does not object to nasty politics, and actually loves it and revels in the muck. This is covered by Whaleoil’s Rules of politics number 7 – If you wrestle with pigs, two things are guaranteed. You will get dirty and the pig will enjoy it.

And as it happens a part of the VRWC is meeting in the city this weekend for a black tie function aimed mainly at kicking David “Clusterfuck” Farrar in the arse. So I am going to take the chance to do a recce for our upcoming “Rooting Stenographers for Palmy” protest that we will be running later this year, with the favored venue currently being right outside Iain Lees-Galloway’s house.

The other rule that Iain Lees-Galloway breaks is Rule 12.

Anyone wanting to join our protest should email the tipline.