This is South Auckland

My friend just recieved this txt msg…see if you can translate it.

Some context to help you decipher: The sender is 16, two kids, lives in South Auckland, owes money, is behind on payments.

One of the 99% no doubt.


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  • Guest

    My best guess…

    Ok, that’s better than nothing, I’m home now if they can come and get the car should I give my car money to them when they come?

    • Dat’s purty gd , Al

      • Clint

        I think you mean “datz purty gd ow.”

  • Gazzaw

    And you wonder why we need National Standards!

  • Chris

    The writer should be back at school in year 2 or 3

  • kiwikevnz

    fine example of youth unemployment

  • guest

    al least he can afford an iphone

    • Gazzaw

      Or stole it.

  • That I can read that frightens me.  

  • thor42

    Two kids already, at 16?  I’ll bet this person has six kids by the time they’re 20.  Six kids that WE will be paying for.

  • Notrotsky

    Clearly in need of an orchiectomy !

  • Michael Duke

    And to think, this could have been a valid response in an English exam that if the examiner could understand it would get marks if the concept was OK.

  • diabolos

    Some perspective – youngsters in affluent areas also txt using that truncated language and mangled expressions.  Its in some cases – the same thinking behind acronyms such as WTF IMHO FFS and other such delights.

    16 with two kids is not good.  Lucrezia Borgia was married and spudded by the tender age of 14 – we havent advanced much since the rennaissance and the “earth is flat and God is the only truth” ages or so it would appear.

    What causes kids to do these things.  What causes people in this particular area to do these things?  What causes it  –  and what is the answer.

    Who was unwise enough to loan a 16 year old with 2 kids money?  And who do they vote for (both the lender and the borrower)?

    • Thorn

      Look at the cultural demographic and despair.

    • Anonymous

      Shut up, diabolos. My kids are of an age with him, one’s younger actually, and apart from the occasional dropped apostrophe and truncated expression (dw = don’t worry, for instance) when they text me they speak in intelligible English, not garbled retard speak.

  • Nobody

    I kind of understand the point of “txt” language as a method to shorten words/phases so they take up less space but why use terms like kar or ohkae when their correct spellings are the same/shorter?

    I’m getting old.



  • Brian Smaller

    @Nobody  – they do it because they cannot actually spell.

    • Dion

      …and national standards are unnecessary because? :)

  • Noone today

    @Guest & @ Gazzaw It was received by an iPhone, doesnt mean it was sent by one

  • jem

    diabolos. “What causes kids to do these things”

    Just a guess here but my pick is that teaching 12year olds about sexual positions and its “ok to play with her clitorus as long as she consents” and “how to perform anal sex” in public school classes probably has something to do with it…

    • Dairymannz38

      If they had been paying attention for the “how to perform anal sex” part of the lesson, they wouldn’t have 2 kids!!!

      • jem

        hahaha, good call.

  • jem

    The worst I’ve seen was from a work colleagues daughter…

    wubu2l – translation…. What You Been Up To Lately.

  • Scanner

    Worked it out, it says – ” I’m a dumb as dogshit coon, and every dollar spent on my education has been wasted, you white MOFO’s”

    • Thorn

      People affectionately known as “our most vulnerable”.

  • Asterix

    Nek Minnit…hes on $15 per hour