Understanding Depression, Ctd

Continuing on from my post of yesterday. During the worst time, de-toxing from anti-depressants I experienced the lowest and  nastiest time of the whole experience. I also suffered depersonalisation at the time…it is too hard to describe. I hated myself, I hated everyone else around me and I did and said and did hateful things, and I can barely remember them because of the depersonalisation. I am so grateful that I have good friends, understanding friends, I nearly lost them all.

This paragraph and this image helps a little to understand it:

I’ve always wanted to not give a fuck. While crying helplessly into my pillow for no good reason, I would often fantasize that maybe someday I could be one of those stoic badasses whose emotions are mostly comprised of rock music and not being afraid of things. And finally – finally – after a lifetime of feelings and anxiety and more feelings, I didn’t have any feelings left. I had spent my last feeling being disappointed that I couldn’t rent Jumanji.

I felt invincible.

 


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As much at home writing editorials as being the subject of them, Cam has won awards, including the Canon Media Award for his work on the Len Brown/Bevan Chuang story. When he’s not creating the news, he tends to be in it, with protagonists using the courts, media and social media to deliver financial as well as death threats.

They say that news is something that someone, somewhere, wants kept quiet. Cam Slater doesn’t do quiet and, as a result, he is a polarising, controversial but highly effective journalist who takes no prisoners.

He is fearless in his pursuit of a story.

Love him or loathe him, you can’t ignore him.

To read Cam’s previous articles click on his name in blue.

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