Bullshit John

NZ Herald

John Key says that there is always Vegemite…he is WRONG!

Prime Minister John Key is among thousands of Kiwis having to ration their Marmite, as ‘Marmageddon’ enters its second day.

Supermarket shelves around the country are being stripped bare of the popular breakfast spread, after production was halted due to earthquake damage discovered at Sanitarium’s Christchurch plant – the only plant where Marmite is made.

Sanitarium is urging consumers not to “freak out” as it works to relocate its Marmite manufacturing facilities to a safer part of the Christchurch site.

But it is asking consumers to ration their Marmite use while supplies are spread thin.

Mr Key said he too will have to spread thin to ensure his supply lasts.

“I only have got a very small amount in my office and once that runs out I’m aware supplies are very short.”

However Mr Key told Firstline this morning that he also likes the Australian-made rival Vegemite.

“I’ve got to be honest, I can eat both.”

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  • Grandstream

    I’ve never understood the marmite vs vegemite debate.  Both are equally acceptable to me, so really dont mind.

    • Heretic! :P

    • TREASON – that is nothing short of HIGH TREASON!!! :P

      Prime Minister that is nothing short of High Treason on what you are suggesting. We demand a State of Emergency Declared and all national efforts put into restoring Marmite supplies immediately. Come on John, if you can save Coro Street from being moved into oblivion then you can save NZ Marmite from the same fate.

      Speaking of which [races to supermarket]

      •  Raced to supermarket this morning, to no avail. Fortunately, the last jar of Marmite in the pantry has only just been opened.

        But the PM is wrong on this one; there’s Marmite, there’s Vegemite, and never the twain should meet!

    • Dr Wang

      Yeah, it’s a bit like Ford vs Holden – some lucky people have just got nothing more important to worry about!

      • kind of except fords & holdens are both made in australia! but yeh marmite running out is hardly top news stuff.

    • Kimbo

       BURN HIM ALIVE!!!

  • Michael

    Vegemite all the way! 

  • BedWetter

    what a tool.

    • Bunswalla

      That’s a self-reflective comment is it, Bedwetter?

    • RightNow

      I sometimes say that when I see my appendage too, in a reverential tone of course.

  • Roland S

    What a hideous argument, don’t fall prey to the biggest marketing scam by Sanitorium… expand your minds, try something new!

    • I did, my actual favourite spreads, raw honey or manuka Honey – YUM!!!

  • Brian Smaller

    They taste completely different.

  • Johno1234

    Marmite – yech. Gimme Vegemite any day. WO – might be worth running a poll on this one?

  • BJ

     Originally Marmite was invented by the British and Nz had its on version well before Vegemite which is an Aussie product that lacks B12 Vit and is Halal  – if any of that makes a difference to your preference. For me its a slamdunk – NZ product over the Aussie any day – always better.

  • Bilcaro

    Typical john Key, shaft the workers and make jokes about his fucking Marmite. What a fucking moron

    • johnbronkhorst

      What a burk you are!!!! But I’m sure John Key is thrilled to know that he is SSSOO powerful that he can cause earthquakes that stop production and put workers out of work!!!….I D I O T!!!!

      • Bilcaro

        JK is a ladeda, much like you SSSOO powerful…NOT

  • Bunswalla

    And you thought the gay marriage debate was a hot topic Cam?

    For me, Marmite = devil’s vomit mixed with toenail scrapings
    Vegemite = a seriously good spread

  • Verylargetbone

    Sanitarium stole the name from the Brits. Pity they didn’t steal the recipe. Try ‘our mate’ this is the rebadged Brit product sold here in nz. Vegemite is closer in taste to this product

    • Michael Duke

      That is for sure, My Mate / Our Mate is a FAR superior product, in fact the only one of the three worth spreading on hot buttered toast.

    • Stevo


  • Bunswalla

    I believe Trevor Mallard has a couple of cases for sale at the right price – check TradeMe for details

    • just seen that….one jar has a no reserve for $3500….what’s the bit some idiot will pay it….for a SPREAD! and i bet the ‘scalpers’ are the reason why the shops stock have suddenly depleted…..more fool the very VERY stupid if they are dumb enough to buy a something so expendable at such exorbitant prices……and if they then cant pay their bills & have the audacity to ask for a grant at winz….or if they starve their kids because of it….i’ll nail their ass!

  • LesleyNZ

    Marmite! Vegemite is not nice and far too salty.

  • Paul_P

    The NZ product isn’t a patch on the Brit product. The Brit product serves the basis for the brand made and sold in S.A. alongside imported Vegemite and and old favourite (my Dr. would shudder) Bovril.

    In NZ our house is a Vegemite and Watties Tomato Sauce house.

    That all said, very clever marketing campaign….saw people leaving the Mt. Wellington Countdown last night with 3, 4 and 5 bottles………anyone checking TradeMe for Marmite yet?

    • Charlie the farmer

      Just did, bloody hell jars of the stuff even those little wee motel packets, get your 1kg jar of marmite for $66

      • i checked too….that is why poor dumb people remain poor dumb people…..and they can’t even say they have more dollars than sense…..!

  • In Vino Veritas

    My father told me vegemite was crushed up aborigines (even though it was made in NZ in those days). Of course that was in the day’s when the PC army wasn’t running about admonishing everyone for anything.
    In saying that, I still eat it, though my daughters prefer marmite.

    • being anti racism is a far cry from being too pc

      and didnt realise vegemite had ever been made in nz…

      • In Vino Veritas

        And being thin skinned and prickly about anything that is said that could remotely be considered racist, is being too PC.


    Sorry guys think both is crap.OK,Know that was an act of treason.Wife likes Vegemite,son likes both.

  • Horace the Grump

    NZ Marmite is shit with spikes on – it is just awful, foul and disgusting.  Vegemite is barely tolerable.  It is not quite shit, but it does very good impersonations of shit all the time.

    However, English Marmite is just ‘to die for’ as the foodies say.  It is just about the best stuff you can spread on bread on the planet.  I have jars of it hoarded at home and I pester anyone I know going to the UK or HK to get some for me…  And when I travel I am sure to stock up

    I was brought up on NZ Marmite and I just can’t stand the stuff having discovered the taste sensation that is English Marmite.  I pity the fools who think NZ Marmite is wonderful; you know not what you are missing.

    Good.  More for me!

  • Phar Lap

    Forget Marmite, Vegemite,Bovril.All come way behind the famous English concoction?Try OXO.

    • Paul_P

       Oxo? Wasn’t it also sold as Fray Bentos Meat Extract? Google the heritage of that and you’ll get an idea of what makes up Marmite.

  • OTGO

    Was at the gym and an asian came up to me and askedme if I liked Marmite. I said, “yes of course. Why?”  He screwed up his face and said his flatmate told him it was chocolate and he shoudl try it. Guess you have to be brought up on it to appreciate it.

  • ConwayCaptain

    Does anyone know where the name Marmite comes from???  I do

    • Charlie the farmer

      tell then..

      • ConwayCaptain

        Look at the label and there is a cooking pot on it.

        Une Marmite was the cooking pot issued to the French Poilus before and during WW1.

  • John Q Public

    I’d truly rather schmeer dog shit on my toast that eat either ShiteMite or Vagi-Mite, and hope this shortage is long term, as in forever.

  • hmmm really don’t understand how anyone can fail to tell the difference between marmite & vegemite….the aussies just dont make it anywhere near as well….bit like their ketch-up vs watties tomatoe sauce.

    no marmite until july is a bit of a bummer but on the bright side it now means our daughter will be forced to have something different (and with more nutrition) in her sandwiches…so thanks sanitarium for this marketing ploy….it is doing mums like me a huge favour!

  • AnonWgtn

    Trade Me has a jar now up to $800


      Sorry but there is one born every day.$800 madness

  • Mr_Blobby

    What would you expect from a treasonous clapping MonKey.  We need laws to ration and ban the hoarding of marmite.

  • wannano

    I have found a 44 gallon drum of black axle grease in the back shed and have got the whanau stuffing it into jars ready for sale on trademe.

    We is gunna make a small fortune between now and July.

  • wannano

    Any tosser that will pay $800 for a jar of yeast extract, will pay goodness knows what for my new and improved axle grease (oops I mean marmite)

    Thank God a fool and his money are still easily parted.

  • Dave

    Such passion in this debate, given its about a thin black spread.   Economics comes to mind here, 101, supply and demand.   A smart importer would be getting supplies of the british equivelent here quick smart, as people either pay more, or switch to Vegemite.   The great marketers would be negotiating with Bovril to cure the outlying islands of a terrible shortage.

    Really…….  We face huge issues, the ports are screwed, the country almost broke, and there are so many posts on a possible shortage of a simple breakfast spread, when Vegemite is so much better…….

  • phil

    JK is right on …mite.  Same as trading money for profit. Once he sorts the … mite issue he’ll be off to his bach in Hawaii

  • Tookinator

    Ben Ross Demands a ‘state of emergency’ be declared.
    In the last state of emergency Gerry Brownlee was appointed the Minister in charge. (Earthquake)
    Let’s hope he isn’t appointed Minister for the Marmite state of emergency as supplies may run out quicker than you think.

    Police raid bogus Marmite factory in Ilam

  • fifibelle

    Great marketing – my daughter is on her OE and read about this on line. She hasn’t eaten the stuff for a few years and now suddenly “needs” some….

    • Travdog

      Yep, nothing like a bit of hysteria to boost sales!

  • Steve (North Shore)

    Wonder if this is marketing by Vegemite? Sure there is a shortage of Marmite so why not push Vegemite?
    There was a story about Kelloggs Corn Flakes. The Kellogs brothers split because one added sugar to the product and then advertised not to buy because there was a shortage. Turnover skyrocketed!

  • Pukakidon

    Who was the famous NZer who it was rumored had to go to hospital to get a Marmite jar removed from his anus?

    • titanuranus

      Helen Clark?

    • Kimbo

      Two hints:

      “Your starter for 10 points:  ‘Who was the famous NZer who it was rumored had to go to hospital to get a Marmite jar removed from his anus?’

      “Two minutes on your specialist subject, “the degenerate habits of New Zealand celebrities”, starting from now…

    • Greg M

      Too easy. Mr “happen inn”
      Rumour has it , he got half a carrot lodged sideways once too.

  • kehua

    Whatever, can`t beat my nannies `goodness butties`.