Lockwood Smith could do with one of these

via the tipline

A reader has suggested that this useful invention could be put to good use by Lockwood Smith in parliament.

Japanese researchers have invented a speech-jamming gadget that painlessly forces people into silence.

Kazutaka Kurihara of the National Institute of Advanced Industrial Science and Technology, and Koji Tsukada of Ochanomizu University, developed a portable “SpeechJammer” gun that can silence people more than 30 meters away.

The device works by recording its target’s speech then firing their words back at them with a 0.2-second delay, which affects the brain’s cognitive processes and causes speakers to stutter before silencing them completely.

Awesome, I’d love to see this deployed against Winston Peters and Trevor Mallard.


THANK YOU for being a subscriber. Because of you Whaleoil is going from strength to strength. It is a little known fact that Whaleoil subscribers are better in bed, good looking and highly intelligent. Sometimes all at once! Please Click Here Now to subscribe to an ad-free Whaleoil.

  • Luke

    Lockwood should wear the wig and robes all the time, he looked like a boss at the state opening.

  • MrV

    “and it cannot stop people making meaningless sounds, such as “ahhh,” that are uttered over a long time period.”

    I think you’ll find this means it won’t work on either Winston or Trevor.

  • joe bloggs

    There’s always a place for good old-fashioned technology…


  • Hagar

    No no no,
    I love listening to Winnie mangling the English language , and Trev’s points of order as if he was so innocent and hard done by.
    They are so funny in the chamber, otherwise it would be so boring!
    It was a near thing the past 3 years with only Trev making a fool of himself, now with Wiinie there the amusement factor has increased threefold!

  • Symgardiner

    Win-stoned First and Trevor are comedy gold. You can’t cut that off.
    By the way, have you noticed that someone is having a crack at Win-stoned every time he stands up. I reckon it is Nick Smith maybe with some help from John Banks. It must be good because it gets under Win-stoned’s skin 9 times out of 10.

  • Boss Hogg

    This device is clearly deficient – where is the Taser attachment ??

  • Jess

     Still it would be great to use on Helen Kelly