It’s Over Trevor

 Southland Times

Like this is ever going to work:

Labour veteran Trevor Mallard is likely to become the party’s buddy MP for Invercargill.

The move is part of the party’s response to its declining vote in the province and would be allied with a more regional approach from its existing Dunedin MPs.

However, the choice will not be without some controversy.

Mr Mallard provoked fury and outrage in the city during his term as education minister in the Labour-led Government as he oversaw the closure of 14 city schools in 2004.

His combative style could also be described as polarising.

Oh dear whatever has Southland done to deserve this…the oyster season has finished so there is absolutely no advantage for anyone wanting to visit the place.

This can only mean several things:

  1. Trevor has a new girlfriend in Invercargill.
  2. He has been given the arse card by Shearer and this is his genius plan that has so much cunning that Trevor has completely missed it.
  3. It wasn’t Shearer’s cunning plan, I sense the hand of Alistair Cameron who has done what Nashy failed to, banish Mallard, in the middle of winter, to the provinces.
  4. Labour have given up on the provinces completely for 2014.
  5. Hutt South is now vacant for Stuart Nash to return.
  6. The lack of broadband will ensure less tweets, Facebook updates and Red Alert posts minimising Labour party SMOGs as a major benefit.
  7. Labour actually hate Southland and Trevor Mallard equally now.
  8. This is Mallard’s cunning plan to avoid litigation from Judith Collins.

If Trevor Mallard is Labour’s answer then it was a bloody stupid question. wait for him to challenge a local blogger to a cycle race (Watch out Ele!)

Trevor Mallard should just face facts, that he has been sent to the New Zealand equivalent of the Siberian gulags.

As an interesting aside one of the most popular sports in Southland is duck shooting. One more Mallard won’t make a blind bit of difference.

Watch his travel bill bloat out like Parekura’s togs when he bombs into the hot pools.

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