Sunday General Debate

So many topics…

Who will replace Lockwood Smith as Speaker? Tau, Maurice or David Carter?

Should we all shed a tear for Stewart Murray Wilson?

In a Mass Knife Fight to the Death Between Every American President, Who Would Win and Why?

To begin, here were the original conditions of the hypothetical, as suggested by the redditor Xineph:

  • Every president is in the best physical and mental condition they were ever in throughout the course of their presidency. Fatal maladies have been cured, but any lifelong conditions or chronic illnesses (e.g. FDR’s polio) remain.
  • The presidents are fighting in an ovular arena 287 feet long and 180 feet wide (the dimensions of the [1] Roman Colosseum). The floor is concrete. Assume that weather is not a factor.
  • Each president has been given one standard-issue [2] Gerber LHR Combat Knife , the knife [3] presented to each graduate of the United States Army Special Forces Qualification Course. Assume the presidents have no training outside any combat experiences they may have had in their own lives.
  • There is no penalty for avoiding combat for an extended period of time. Hiding and/or playing dead could be valid strategies, but there can be only one winner. The melee will go on as long as it needs to.
  • FDR has been outfitted with a [4] Bound Plus H-Frame Power Wheelchair, and can travel at a maximum speed of around 11.5 MPH. The wheelchair has been customized so that he is holding his knife with his dominant hand. This is to compensate for his almost certain and immediate defeat in the face of an overwhelming disadvantage.
  • Each president will be deposited in the arena regardless of their own will to fight, however, personal ethics, leadership ability, tactical expertise etc., should all be taken into account. Alliances are allowed.

THANK YOU for being a subscriber. Because of you Whaleoil is going from strength to strength. It is a little known fact that Whaleoil subscribers are better in bed, good looking and highly intelligent. Sometimes all at once! Please Click Here Now to subscribe to an ad-free Whaleoil.

  • Brian Smaller

    I would say Andrew Jackson would be my presidential pick in a knife fight. He knew how to wield a scalping knife. Second – Teddy Roosevelt.

    • Brian Smaller

      And he killed a few men in duels apparently, which has to count for something.

  • link hawk

    Helen kelly is on Q and A this morning ,full of shit as always .

    • AnonWgtn

      Kelly is just staking her place to take Rongotai from retiring Annette King.
      This has to happen before February next so that she can influence the Union’s position from within to change the Parliamentary Laour Party – like getting rid of the many deadbeats and filling the list with Unionists. Remember the new leadership rules created heavily by her and the new lady President of the Party, whose name I cannot remember.
      This will then set her up as the new Labour Messiah, full of Union sycophants, well sickos anyway.
      Even Robertson will be dogs tucker under her tutilage.

      • Blokeintakapuna

        Scary prospect! Especilally whilst trying to digest lunch…

    • The Gantt Guy

      And yet given a complete free pass by the leftist, empty suit, talking head a-hole host.

    • Pete George

      Kelly just seems to parrot union/Labour Party lines, often off topic.

    • Gazzaw

      Thanks for the advice. I’ll watch it tomorrow as I don’t want to stuff up my Sunday.

  • cows4me

    Obama would win. His demented followers would lay down their lives for the annioted one.
    Seen it’s a general debate, can someone tell me why I have to pick a name and give my email every time I post.I don’t tweet, who the fuck wants to know what a cow cockie is up to every minute of the day. I’m not on face book, i have a strong aversion to it. I tried to register with Disqus but it says I’m submitting an incorrect email but it’s the same email I use to post a comment .And I why do I need google, already know where I am. Yeah I know I’m thick.

  • Richard

    Eisenhower, a trained soldier.

    • So was Teddy Roosevelt…and an mean soldier he was too

  • Pete George

    Surprised they didn’t already have reading recovery in all schools. This is better looking policy from Labour (once you get past the political palaver) targeted at one of the biggest problems in education, kids who can’t read.

    Labour: need reading recovery

    No posts about it on Red Alert or The Standard yet (although someone has commented on it there).

    • But Pete, Labour and the teacher unions constantly tell us that we have the best education system in the world…now it appears it is the best that requires pupils to undergo reading recovery??? What gives?

      • Pete George

        Some in Labour may be getting realistic? One can always hope.

        • nasska

          Or the extra $20 million will guarantee the employment of a few more drongo teachers itching to join the union & pay their fees to Labour.

    • johnbronkhorst

      well perhaps pete if ALL schools taught reading and writing properly in the firt place…there would be no need for reading recovery programmes.

  • Mr Ruby

    Jack Fitzgerald Kennedy would have that hands down. Did anyone see photos from his WWII days? The only game changer would be if Lee Harvey Oswald was ‘chillin’ in the stands.

  • Ronnie Chow

    When will Maori begin to question their adoption of Christianity ?. How are they comfortable with the obvious disparity between Christian beliefs and their pre-European belief system , where all things were thought of as possessing a life force or mauri.?
    Are the Maori simply , and perhaps cleverly , using Christian practice to satisfy and even enhance traditional cultural imperatives. ?

  • Phar Lap

    Just reading a few comments from a little pest called Mc Carten.He writes weekly in the Weekend Horrid.Seems he is very good at giving advice,and loves putting the boot into the Nats.My question to him might be.if he knows so much and is an economic whiz kid..Why did he let the NZ Taxpayer allow him to ursurp his Union Members PAYE tax,and not pay it to the IRD.Wonder should the Serious Fraud Office be looking into the actions and activities of his, we know best United Union,the NZ economy destroyer.

  • Phar Lap

    Latest news is Lie-bour’s Louisa Wall wants kids to start school at FOUR..Probably easier to brainwash them with outdated and outer space socialist brainwashing.Free food bill will be even higher than what has been mentioned to bribe retrobate parents and screw the long suffering taxpayer.