Predictions for 2013

Since everyone is doing them I better get in. Here are my 13 predictions for 2013:

  1. National Party MPs will cringe every time Hekia Parata is asked a question in the house, and will avoid being in the house when they know Hekia is going to be rinsed.
  2. Nanaia Mahuta remains anonymous and never holds Hekia to account.
  3. Iain Lees-Galloway?s missus is still dirty with him every time he mentions a certain stenographer.
  4. Nikki Kaye goes on a three day bender.
  5. No one will miss Simon FIGJAM Power.
  6. The Speaker?s election is nowhere near as smooth as John Key expects.
  7. Helen Kelly?s total shamelessness after the disaster of the Hobbit and the Ports of Auckland dispute means she runs for Rongotai.
  8. Russel Norman manages to get the Green Party membership not to do anything too stupid for another year.
  9. National MPs work out that their vote is the one seat majority, and that John Key can stick it if he doesn?t like what they are up to.
  10. David Farrar sees his willie for the first time in decades and celebrates by blogging about some boring subsidised liberal elite play.
  11. David Cunliffe fails to muster 13 votes to trigger a leadership election and the base goes feral as they realise they have been duped.
  12. Kim Dotcon finds that Kiwis support for him is about the same as a imported stool at the warehouse under his enormous weight and no one turns up to wave him good bye on his trip to the US.
  13. Parekura Horomia, Gerry Brownlee and Kim Dotcom sign up for the Fight for Life – Sumo edition, Approached have been made to Carmel Sepuloni or Carol Beaumont for the 4th spot.
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