New business opportunities for professional victims

Don’t like taking personal responsibility for anything?

McDonalds made you fat?

National made it rain on your caravan?

Then this news item is for you!

Five inmates at the Idaho State Correctional Institution are suing national beer and wine companies for $1 billion, claiming that alcohol was responsible for their crimes.

The civil suit alleges that they were not sufficiently warned about alcohol’s addictive properties.

The inmates, who do not yet have an attorney, drafted the litigation themselves.

It’s a great start.

Next, Tobacco, TV, Playstation, the Internet and Apple.

Keith Allan Brown, who pleaded guilty in 2010 to voluntary manslaughter, filed the suit on Dec. 10, according to the Kansas City Star. The 52-year-old wrote that over the course of his life, he has spent almost 30 years in prison, and that alcohol has “played a major role” in most of the situations that landed him there.

“At no time in my life,” the suit states, “prior to me becoming an alcoholic, was I ever informed that alcohol was habit forming and addictive.”

Quite the revelation after 30 years.

Give that man a DB.

Oh wait…

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