Sad, Fat, Crap and Dumb

What a tragedy.

A 10 year old weighs 71 kgs. That is the tragedy.

A 10-year-old Porirua boy has torn down his rugby posters and binned his All Blacks duvet cover after his local rugby club made him feel “sad and fat”.

Joshua Moe has been told he has to play in the under-13s this season because – at 71 kilograms – he is too heavy to play in his own age group. But Joshua fears he will get hurt playing with boys who are older than him.

“They’re allowed to stand on each other and push in the scrum in under-13s, and that’s scary,” he said. 

Last year Joshua received special permission to play in the Northern United under-11s team – a grade lower than the rules allowed for someone of his weight.

But at last week’s weigh-in for the new season, the club told him he had to move up to the under-13s. His mother, Vanessa Moe, queried the ruling, but was told he could either play in the under-13s or not at all.

She has now complained to the club, as well as to the New Zealand Rugby Union and the Human Rights Commission.

“This has gone beyond rugby itself, and is now about a club making my son feel like crap and not wanting to play at all,” she said.

The fact that his mother doesn’t accept there is an issue is the exact reason why the kid is so fat.

He wants to be able to trample over his fellow 10 year olds, but objects to being trampled on by people who weigh the same.

Rugby is about physics. Not about sensitivity to a delicate fat boy’s weight problem.

Sorry Joshua, but your mother has a problem, and until she faces up to it, you will remain way too heavy for you to play rugby with your mates. The ony people making you feel sad, fat and crap is your victim mentality….and that just makes you dumb as well.


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  • unsol

    I don’t think it is appropriate calling an overweight 10 year old boy dumb: his mother – yes most certainly, but him? Definitely not. I think you are being cruel & as a father you should know better than to call children dumb.

    This boy is merely regurgitating the rubbish his mother has been telling him.

    If he was my child – unlikely as I take the role as gatekeeper of our food & nutrition very seriously, I would be honest & say that there are just some things in life one has to miss out on if they make bad choices. Cause & effect – something our 7 year old already understands (if she choices to talk back, slam doors or refuse to do what we have asked her then she misses out on something she enjoys). It doesn’t always stop her from making bad choices, but it does mean she comes to us later, apologies, says how disappointed she is at missing out & promises to try better next time.

    However, this boy has been fed food his mother has purchased & made for him so the responsibility lies with her.

    That said, while he is clearly overweight, he doesn’t look too bad & does in fact look very tall for his age.

    So perhaps his weight his partly due to that – even if he was in a healthy weight range he may still be too heavy.

    But such his life. He has to accept it as if this is the case then no doubt it will be an issue that will crop up time & time again.

  • LionKing

    People in NZ need to harden the fuck up. the kid is enormous compared to his mates. No doubt his mum is seeking financial gain from WINZ as a result of this being so unfair. WTF.


    With all due respect whale, saying: “The ony people making you fee sad, fat and crap is your victim mentality….and that just makes you dumb as well.” is a bit shit.
    By all means go to town on the mother, but the kid has pretty limited control over his diet, and at that age his thinking is more a reflection of his parents than anything else. You’re not wrong, but you’re going about being right about the issue in the wrong manner.

    • unsol


      • Bunswalla

        Bullshit – both of you. The only reasons the kid feels “sad and fat” are

        a) He chooses to feel that way. Blaming the rugby club for “making him feel something” is bullshit. Own your actions mate, including how you feel, what you eat, how much of it and how often.

        b) He is fat, and someone has pointed it out.

        Correct response: look inside yourself, decide who you want to be, and go for it. Incorrect reponse: go bleating to the media, perpetuate victim mentality, the rugby club made me feel sad, eat a bucket of KFC.

        • GMMNZ

          He’s 10 dude. You honestly think he asked mum to call the newspaper and complain to the Human Rights Committee?

  • Patrick

    This is a very real issue & one the NZRFU have had to resort to age & weight grading to try to combat. It doesn’t matter whether genetics or diet or whatever it is that make this kid bigger than the others, the fact of the issue is he will hurt other 10 year olds that he plays against.
    My sons’ under 12 team played open grade last year because they had a number of boys in a similar situation & these boys would have no team otherwise. They were occaisionally playing against kids over 100kgs, yes it is unbelievable but it is the reality in places with PI populations – these kids are big, hard & strong. Most of my sons’ mates are around the 50 – 55kg mark. It is not until the early 20’s that the weight & strength of these kids starts to even out.

  • What planet are you guys on? He and his dumb mother went to the media…they ran and squealed and cried like babies…and allowed for photos to be taken…and somehow I am the mean person who tells the truth.

    If you don;t want people commenting on your weight in public then don;t go running ot the media. I mean really…who is the one to blame here.

    Plus those are all his own words…I just added dumb…and on the evidence before me I can’t really see why that is an insult.

    • unsol

      Come on Cameron, surely you can see this. It isn’t the entire message per se, it is the way you are delivering it.

      Are you sure the boy complained to the media or do you think it was his mother?

      He is a child & his weight is the fault & responsibility of his parents. He has no ability to choose his own foods – he doesn’t work, doesn’t cook & basically eats what is in his cupboards or what his parents prepare for him.

      Calling his mother dumb – fair enough. But the child who is the innocent victim in this? No way.

      Take it back I tell you, take it back!

      • Mr_Blobby

        HTFU Unsol. Wonder what they had for diner that night, greasys from down at the take away shop.

        Now I myself am fat and I blame nobody but myself. It is my responsibility to get out of bed in the morning and do something about it. It is probably a war that I will lose, but that does not mean that I should not fight it.

        My only consolation at the moment is that Whale Boy has more blubber than me. But that is the difference between McChucks for breakfast and a 5 Km walk, times 365.

        • unsol

          Get fucked blobbed.

          It is not OK to call a child dumb EVER.

          • Mr_Blobby

            I like meat pies, steak and cheese is a favorite.

          • unsol

            Haha you cheeky bugger!

            But validate my bloody point damn it – I am right on this & you know it!!!

          • What if they are dumb…or do you subscribe to every child is a genius theory that infests our schools?

          • unsol

            They might be dumb but that isn’t the point & you know it.

            His academic ability is irrelevant; you called him dumb because he was upset at being too fat to play rugby for his current team.

            Suck it up Cameron. You got this one wrong. Retract calling this boy dumb & preserve your moral compass!

        • Oh come on you still iron your shirt with a wok

          • Mr_Blobby

            And I still like meat pies.

      • Jonathan

        For someone who doesn’t tolerate bullying he clearly seems ok about partaking in it. It really is a shame, I thought he would be able to identify the problem being the mother and yes the victim being the child given a clearly shit diet and possibly up bringing.
        Perhaps you need to live up to your own words and morals first then comment on others positions.
        I hope thats constructive enough

    • GMMNZ

      I think the mother probably had more to do with going to the media than the kid did.

  • For all of you who are outraged…Steve Hughes has something to say on the matter.

  • I spent a lot of years in junior rugby in the Wellington region and these rules worked. Some kids were just too big. We had one kid who played three grades higher one year. This kid’s mother needs to pull her head in.

  • cruiseyman

    So if he doesn’t want to play with kids older than him he should just choose another sport, one in which his size doesn’t matter. Kids need to learn that they can’t have everything tailor made to suit them and teaching them otherwise does them no favours at all. I’m sure there are kids who would love to do some sports that they are physically unsuited too (gymnastics for example) so they do something else. Again, the media is doing NZ no favours by encouraging people to cry ‘victim’ whenever something doesn’t go their way.

  • steve and monique

    His weight means he has to play in the 13 year olds grade,but his mindset is still a 10 year old. So instead of complaining get his weight down so he can join his mates.Down to the parents to do what is required regards healthy eating,and moderation,and of course exercise. Otherwise there is always Sumo.

  • Honcho

    Why is this even newsworthy? Slow day?

  • spollyike

    Talk about inequality, just because you’re fat doesn’t give you the right to trample over non-fat kids the same age. This kid want to have his cake and eat it too, quite literally.

    • unsol

      That’s a really awful way of saying the boy should be in the right group for his age – never mind the fact that Wellington Rugby said there were other teams in his age group he could play for.

      All this boy wanted to do was play rugby with his friends. Thanks to his very obvious height & his mother failing in her role as the gatekeeper of his dietary needs he can’t.

      Debate the issue – his mother’s bad choices; picking on the boy/making fun if him makes you a bully & a poor example for your own children.

      • Bunswalla

        How dare you pick on his mother! How do you know whose choices have led to beast-zilla being bounced from age-grade rugby to protect the health and well-being of his team-mates and opponents?

        • unsol

          Fuck off bunny – how dare you pick on a 10 year old child.

          You’re a hypocrite & a bully. Even if you have the maturity of a 10 year old – or less – that doesnt mean as an adult you have the right to pick on a child.

          As for his mother – it’s not picking on her, it’s holding her to account. Children are a privilege not a right & she needs to demonstrate this by being a mother who feeds their child properly & responsibly.

          • Bunswalla

            Are you socialist cindy in disguise? It appears you’re frothing at the teeth, my dear. I prescribe a nice cup of tea and a lie-down.

            But no cakes!

          • unsol

            Aah nice try…I’m far to pretty to be labelled a horse!

            And nice side stepping bunny…

  • Rat

    nice having attacks on his mother, but for fuck sake, he’s only a 10 year old kid, and a 10 year old kid trying to play rugby, surely thats a good sign ?

    Nope, he’s a 10 year old who is big…

    yeah lets all have a laugh at some fat kid. all feeling better now ?

    A new low

    • Bunswalla

      So you condone bullying and picking on women, you sexist piece of shit.

      • unsol

        You’re getting desperate bunny….

        If rat is being sexist then you are being a child abuser.

        • Bunswalla

          Take care, unsolicitedious, you’re heading towards thin ice…of course he’s being sexist, he said “nice having attacks on his mother”.

          What about his father? And why is it OK for him to bully a woman? Pretty despicable, and exposes you both for being complete hypocrites.

          Not to mention a bunny-boiler

  • Tony V

    Maybe he could play an individual sport; like running, or swimming or cycling, maybe…

  • Andy

    Whale,have to agree with you.
    Their bloody fault as they put it in the public domain.
    Get a life, get on a diet.
    And as for the mother, maybe she should be charged with Child abuse or at least she should be publicly shamed.

    • unsol

      Not their – her fault. The child is a victim of circumstances she created.

      • Bunswalla

        And… know this how?

  • Jonathan

    Picking on kids, thats a little low.

    Sling all the shit you want at the crap mother but name calling a kid. Really?

    • Rat

      I couldnt believe the bullying, an absolute disgrace. If this was someone else other than Cameron, he’d be onto it with child abuse et al

      • Bunswalla

        Fuck off rat-face. How dare YOU bully an overweight person. For shame.

    • Bunswalla

      Mother-beater. What a cock.

  • minarchist_kiwi

    I am with Whaleoil – and I think some of the posters here have not been to Porirua lately (as I was on Monday).
    This boy and his size, along with his Mother and her IQ, are fairly commonplace in that godforsaken part of NZ.

    • unsol

      You’ve missed the point. The issue is with WO calling the child dumb & putting the blame on him for his mother making him overweight & his mother going to the media. This chid is a victim of circumstances his mother created.

      Play the issue for sure but calling a child names is unacceptable.

    • Rat

      So Cameron abusing a 10 year old is acceptable in your world ?

  • My 10 year old has just cracked the 30kg. It’s incredible that some of you would want the two kids to be playing a physical game opposite one another. More than DOUBLE the weight FFS

    • Jonathan

      I think the level of disgust in this particular post is more towards Camerons post and words as opposed to the size of the child etc.
      I certainly agree that for safety reasons the child shouldn’t be able to play rugby against kids who may be half his size.
      But blaming and name calling towards the kids is why people are up in arms. Call out the shit parenting by all means but dont be that adult that bullys a kid.

      • Bunswalla

        I call bullshit on your faux outrage. All you’re doing is taking a much-sought-after opportunity to stick the knife into WO. He’s 100% right on this – victim mentality and entitle-itis is NOT going to help this poor, dumb fat kid to take control of his nutrition, his weight, and his life. Shame on you for enabling and perpetuating that vicious cycle by aiming your pathetic pop-gun at the messenger.

        • unsol

          This child is a bloody victim – put the blame & accountability onto his mother not him!!!

          What this child needs is a parent who knows what love means: if he is too big even if with weight range for his unusual height then she needs to tell him that life just sucks sometimes.

          But in the meantime she can start feeding him the nutrition he needs & deserves so that he isn’t so big, has more energy & has more options including the chance to live a long life free from diabetes, joint issues & heart conditions.

          He is 10 years old – saying he has a victim mentality is cruel & wring. He is 10 YEARS OlD!!!!

          • Bunswalla

            Oh, settle the fuck down. Sure he’s a 10-year old kid, but FFS he’s a beast. Are you really trying to tell me he was force-fed all those packets of crisps, KFC and litres of fizzy drink? It’s about time people took responsibility for their own actions, and 10 years old is ABSOLUTELY the right age to start doing it.

            You’re worse than his stupid mother, apologising for the fact that people are pointing out the obvious truth – STOP EATING CAKES, MATE!

            Talk about the elephant in the room – literally.

          • unsol

            “It’s about time people took responsibility for their own actions, and 10 years old is ABSOLUTELY the right age to start doing it”

            Right so in other words rather than eating the food his mother provides you expect him to leave school, get a job, buy his own groceries & prepare his own meals?

            Fuck off bunny. You’re being a complete tool & you are full of it.

            You are placing an expectation on this boy that you wouldn’t place on your own child.


        • Random66

          Buns, your wit is normally razor sharp and you come across as a guy who clearly doesn’t suffer fools and you have a take no prisoners manner. I like that about you. While I certainly don’t agree with this family going to the media and I think they all just need to suck it up and understand he has to play in a grade based on weight – end of. I honestly believe though that if someone ridiculed one of your children in such a public manner, and it wasn’t even really their fault, you would come out guns ablazing and lookout the fool who got in your way. That’s the thing you see, the good guys always protect the innocent, the vulnerable and most certainly the children.

          • Bunswalla

            Fair point, well made. But how do you know “it wasn’t even really their fault” ?

          • Random66

            A child up to the age of 10 would certainly have been dependent upon the care of others. He would simply eat what was provided and think nothing of it. Whether this child is larger than normal because of diet or genetics, either are probably outside of his control at this stage. You are right though it’s time for a reality check, but who’s going to give it to them? How can he make changes when he doesn’t understand how to or that he needs to.

          • Bunswalla

            I guess we’re doing that now, by proxy. I don’t like the “woe is me” poor victim mentality. it does the kid no favours at all. Somebody needs to say to him “Hey mate, if you want to play rugby with kids your own age, stop eating bad food. Actually, stop eating bad food anyway, at least the amount you’re eating. You may not understand this right now, but you’re going to have a life full of nasty and terminal medical issues if you don’t take responsibility for your diet and exercise.”

          • unsol

            These kinds of post make 2 quotes spring to mind:

            “Men are more moral than they think and far more immoral than they can imagine .” ― Sigmund Freud

            “….If by strength is meant moral power, then woman is immeasurably man’s superior. Has she not greater intuition, is she not more self-sacrificing, has she not greater powers of endurance, has she not greater courage? Without her, man could not be…” Mahatma Gandhi

            This blog is dominated with men so at times it becomes a silly boys club where testosterone & arrogance overrides common sense & reason.

            The reality is each & every one of these guys are fathers would be fighting as hard for their child as what I am doing for this boy.

            Their need to be right is clouding the hypocrisy of their stance.

        • Jonathan

          Im past my previous little stuff up with WO. I often agree with some of the articles, thoughts and comments he posts. Im not wishing to “stick the knife in” I just found it odd given his words to me towards bullying (which were and are correct) and then this article in question. If this kid wasn’t made into a victim do you think his shit mother would do anything to help his situation? She was clearly happy to let him get to this stage so whos to say that the victim mentality wont shed some light on his problem and get his mothers act together, I think that would be a pretty positive outcome.

          The other reason why I wasn’t to pleased with the post is through my own actions until about 6 months ago I was a “fat” person and bullying and harsh words affected me, yes it was my own fault etc and I fixed it but what place does an adult have belittling a child?

    • unsol

      Who has said that? I haven’t seen any comments stating that?

      The issue with this post is the delivery not the message -Cameron should not have called this boy dumb. It was cruel & unnecessary.

      In terms of his size vs his team – I think fair enough. If our daughter at 21kg was up against a GK who was even 30kg or more I’d be worried. 1kg extra on a child is huge let alone 40kg or so!

      But end of the day this boy has done nothing wrong. He is clearly very tall for his age ( which is out of his control) & overweight – which is his mother’s fault.

      How come this is so difficult to comprehend?

      • Bunswalla

        Yes unsol, he has done lots of things wrong. For starters, he’s shovelled huge amounts of sugary, highly-processed, nutritionally poor crap down his over-sized gullet, for years.

        Are you seriously telling me he was force-fed this crap for the last 10 years? My 14-year old boy knows that when he feels full, he’s had enough, and he stops eating. We’re not talking rocket science here.

        • Jonathan

          If he has been raised in such a way that he doesn’t know that its bad to “shovel” food away can you blame him?
          Have teachers said something, has the doctor said something or has everyone failed this child in education and diet.
          Children are a product of their upbringing and if he hasn’t been taught properly how is he to know any better.
          As ive said hopefully the article without the bullying will open either his eyes or his mothers eyes and they can sort it out.
          I think your putting a little to much emphasis on just what a 10 year old knows is right and wrong etc.

  • Jman

    I thought they put kids into weight categories already for rugby in an effort to get more white kids to play.

  • fozzie2

    Typical rugby union – believe you me if this kid had parents with ‘connections’ he would be playing with a dispensation with his mates !! Sat season after season watching my son play through the grades – he came up against some pretty solid boys and was none the worse for wear!! See the League teams are happy for him to play – hope he does and becomes a star !!

  • Callum

    He doesn’t actually look that fat to me, seems a lot taller than his mates. Still stupid crying to the media though.

  • TomTom

    71kg?! I’m 1.85m tall and I weigh between 75-80kg! What has that boy been eating?!


      • Rat

        Cameron, did you keep up with your weight loss when you were doing the gay cycling ( your words) before Mallard had to cycle back to let you catch up with him ?… how was the weight loss after that ?

        • Bunswalla

          Rat, have you been keeping up your psychological counselling sessions to deal with your borderline personality disorder? Or did you and your 11th therapist agree that you’re just an arsehole?