Gareth Morgan and Geoff Simmons think Red Bull is for kids


Seriously you can’t make this stuff up.

North Korea’s latest PR guy Gareth Morgan and his raving zombie mate Geoff Simmons are a couple of numb-nuts that think it’s a good idea to give kids a can of Red Bull or V, or at least include them into their book-pimping exercise to get attention.

They’re the backers of another purist Anna Bordignon (oh that’s right she’s pimping a new cookbook as well). Ms Bordignon is fronting the Munch Awards that seeks to slag off various companies.

Let’s have a look at who else is involved in attacking businesses that employ kiwis in New Zealand, pay taxes, offer training and career opportunities, support local communities etc.   

Mmmm, there’s nanny-state activist and know it all Robyn Toomath who runs the Fight the Obesity Epidemic, well known Maori troughers Te Hotu Manawa Maori and the Cancer Society – all now tucking into $2.3 million handouts thanks to Tony Ryall.

But back to the issue at hand. Why would anyone think it’s a good idea to give kids an energy drink, but more to the point why include it as a Runner-up in the Worst Kids Food Product category?

Simple really, it’s all about getting media coverage and attacking companies that these purists don’t like. Ones like McDonalds, Tegal, KFC, Sanitarium, Coca-Cola, Frucor.

Maybe it’s a simple case of Gareth Morgan throwing his money around thinking everyone should do as he says. North Korea will be proud of their latest prodigy.


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  • drummerboy

    red bull and V are not for children, but children do drink a lot of it. i would say the biggest consumer would be young adults. the only reason kids drink it is because there dumb parents give them money to buy it with.

    • BJ

      My teenagers tried it on for years, everytime we went to the supermarket they’d pick up a carton of the evil stuff but they knew the answer was always going to be No! I managed to get the youngest to 15 yrs energy drinks/ caffeine free. I accept they will now drink what they like outside the home if they have money to buy it but I continue to harp on about the evils of it and it seems to be sinking in.

  • conwaycaptain

    Some of these foods are high in sugar and other nasties. I live alone apart from the Boss (the dog) and I started buying these ready to eat meals. Found out high in sodium (salt) and many of the other processed foods high in salt and sugar.
    I cook ALL my meals from scratch. Last night onions, garlic, baked beans, chicken breast and spices + rice. Took about 15 mins.
    Tonight, stir fried beef in spices with onions, garlic and frozen veges with rice.
    It is easy to eat healthy. A can of tinned tomatoes as the base for many recipes costs 85c. Rice in bulk 10 kg about $12.
    I bought a bread maker at the appliance warehouse at about 1/2 price an make my own bread and I buy 5kg flour about every 10 weeks and the skim milk powder, brown sugar, yeast about every 3 months. Saves a fortune.


      Hi Conway
      A man after my own heart.
      It’s just me I know but if I was rich I would set up some kind of an educational venture where the utter commonsense of your post could be spread to the masses, it would surely improve the lives on many of the unwashed who can’t seem to ‘live cheaper’ for want of a better phrase.
      As you pointed out, so many ways to save so much money – for those that just take time to think about things.
      It’s probably just me.

      • conwaycaptain

        You can go to the supermarket and by meat that is near the use by date and take it home and freeze it. I have just used beef stir fry bought at 40% off and then frozen. That meal with rice has done me for tonight and breakfast in the morning.
        I buy skim milk powder and make up the milk and that is cheaper than buying fresh
        All the supermarkets now have in house brands so you can buy many things a lot cheaper. I see on the can of baked beans that is equivalent to 2 vege helpings.

    • Ronnie Chow

      Respect Cap’n…..

      It ate the food it ne’er had eat,
      And round and round it flew.
      The ice did split with a thunder-fit;
      The helmsman steered us through!

      And a good south wind sprung up behind;
      The Albatross did follow,
      And every day, for food or play,
      Came to the mariner’s hollo!

      A speck, a mist, a shape, I wist!
      And still it neared and neared:
      As if it dodged a water-sprite,
      It plunged and tacked and veered.

      With throats unslaked, with black lips baked,
      We could nor laugh nor wail;
      Through utter drought all dumb we stood!
      I bit my arm, I sucked the blood,
      And cried, A sail! a sail!

      With throats unslaked, with black lips baked,
      Agape they heard me call:
      Gramercy! they for joy did grin,
      And all at once their breath drew in.
      As they were drinking all.

  • Sponge

    I wish Gareth Morgan would just piss off back to his socialist paradise and keep his opinions to himself on what seems to be almost every aspect of life in New Zealand.

    • disqus_Aa7kWsb7Fp

      But then we’d lose 30% of the MSM comedy turn

  • conwaycaptain

    Red Bull was invented in Thailand to keep the taxi and pedicab drivers awake.

    • Col

      I heard a guy had a hangover in Thailand and the barman made this drink for him and he got the recipe ?

  • conwaycaptain

    If WINZ actually put on cooking classes for the DPB people etc they could save these people a fortune. Put out a weekly recipe list.
    Countdown put them out. Feed 4 for $15. Less than $4 a head

    • unitedtribes

      But then they would have to cook it. Cant be bothered. Go to KFC

      • Bad__Cat

        Power got cut off because they blew budget on weed, tobacco & booze

  • cows4me

    I don’t know anyone who would give their kids Red Bull but we live in the country and we are a bit funny like that, I won’t even drink the crap. Morgan is in the unfortunate situation of having a fair bit of wealth and fuck all common sense. Which just goes to prove one doesn’t need a high IQ to be rich.

  • James Growley

    Is that what Len was drinking to stay awake on the job?

    • Donovan Jackson

      Nah, Red Bull keeps you up all night.

      • Sooty

        Well it did not work for Lenny. Two minutes and he blew his noodle.

  • LionKing

    Hell, if you’ve got a book to sell, all you have to do these days is abuse the shit out of someone else – particularly a company/business and you’ll get coverage. Clearly these fucktards have nothing better to do.

  • unitedtribes

    Somehow I think that North Korea also think Morgan is a joke

  • Kimbo

    I liked Gareth Morgan a lot more before I knew who he was. Does easy money make you a prophet overnight ?

    • Sponge

      He thinks it does. Christ, selling his kiwisaver scheme made him an overnight expert in nutrition, football management, global economics , the environment and matters feline and God only knows what else that I can’t remember.

      He is a tool.

      • Kimbo

        An insult to tools which can be handy. Your son sells a business, gives you a shitload of easy money and that buys you a voice. He’s a delusional idiot, luckily he lives in Auckland so he’s in good company.

      • Sponge

        Penguins – I knew there was some other stupid thing he was into.

  • Pete

    GM needs to buy another bike and go for a long ride, …and dont come back matey!