Mediaworks, The Edge staff & competition winners piss off an entire plane of people

Travel at the best of times is frustrating. I have done more than enough of it to choose not to travel unless I absolutely have to.

What with people thinking that traveling with a baby moments after its birth, taking rug rats screaming all the way through airports to sit behind you and kick your seat incessantly, and the interminable waiting, queuing and security checks, travel actually sucks.

It is a brutal necessity to get somewhere nice.

The arm rest stealer…ok I’m one of those, but dare anyone to take it off me. The prick who climbs out of his seat by hauling on your seat back. The weak bladdered sook who sits by the window and has to climb over everyone to get out 5 times on a 3 hour flight…yes travel sucks.

But occasionally you wind up surround by complete cocks.

What’s more they were all be-decked in t-shirts emblazoned with The Edge radio station, wearing id cards of some sort as well. Something about a red card. Some were staff…I know because they were loudly telling everyone they were, where they worked, what they did and what goats their bosses were.

Anyway they were acting like cocks before they got on the plane, running and cavorting down access-ways, one fool, a staff member was even in bare-feet after some other fool broke his jandals…kicking them around the airport like soccer balls.

They were the last to board and I had the misfortune to have 3 of them immediately behind me.

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Now it is a 3 hour flight…I can put up with most things for an hour, even two but for 3 hours straight these cocks talked incessantly, boasting about how much they were going to get hammered on their trip, and more importantly how much they had drunk in the bar before getting on the plane.

They were so loud that you couldn’t hear the movie over their talking and silliness.

What was most illuminating for the 50 passengers in hearing range was the details of one Mediaworks staff member and the travails of his gay lifestyle in Wellington, Christchurch, Gisborne and now Auckland. He was quite specific and I’m sure the people with the pre-schoolers sitting across the aisle were mortified. Here’s a handy hint for the Mediaworks staffer sitting behind me…I don’t care nor do I want to hear about your “partner” and your life…I want to watch the movie and get off the plane as quickly as possible as calm as possible.

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One interesting discussion, for around 20 minutes was about the best hangover…Mr Gay Mediaworks staffer was most emphatic…the best cure for a hangover is swimming in salt water…apparently it is “AAAAAAAmaaazzing”…I know this because he said it about 50 times.

I’ll tell you what is amazing…that I didn’t stand up at this point and smash these guys in the gob.

After multiple seat climbs, incessant chatter the final straw for me was their raucous cheering and carry on at about 2:45 into the flight.

I finally snapped. After securing a few photos…I stood up and gave it to them. Full Whale noise…with a few words that would get you banned on the blog if you used them in the comments.

And you know what…It was all my fault apparently…I should have spoken up sooner. The real kicker was the guy sitting immediately behind me informing me that he was previously two ticks National and now because I dared to tell them to STFU he wouldn’t. Like I care.

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The lady sitting next to me thanked me and the older couple in front of me thanked me also as did a few others as we exited the plane.

And there was the fool in barefeet running through Nadi airport to cap it all off.

I hope they enjoy their holiday, because I suspect they might not like their return to work.

I learned years ago not to piss people off in airplanes, or do work, or speak of work. You never know who you are going to be sitting next to, or near.

And if that person happens to get really annoyed and they also have a 150,000 page views a day on their website…well things are going to get messy.

NFWAB


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As much at home writing editorials as being the subject of them, Cam has won awards, including the Canon Media Award for his work on the Len Brown/Bevan Chuang story. When he’s not creating the news, he tends to be in it, with protagonists using the courts, media and social media to deliver financial as well as death threats.

They say that news is something that someone, somewhere, wants kept quiet. Cam Slater doesn’t do quiet and, as a result, he is a polarising, controversial but highly effective journalist who takes no prisoners.

He is fearless in his pursuit of a story.

Love him or loathe him, you can’t ignore him.

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