Crap cracker jokes

What do they sing at a snowman’s birthday party?

Freeze a jolly good fellow


Why does Santa have three gardens?

So he can ‘ho ho ho’!


What does Miley Cyrus have at Christmas?



Knock, knock

Who’s there?


Arthur who?

Arthur any mince pies left?


What do vampires sing on New Year’s Eve?

Auld Fang Syne


Why did Santa’s helper see the doctor?

Because he had a low “elf” esteem!

You know the jokes that come in Christmas crackers…

Here’s the best from our round of festive cracker pulling yesterday:

How do you get rid of a boomerang?

Throw it down a one way street

If you can still remember your best, or worst, feel free to share them below.


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As much at home writing editorials as being the subject of them, Cam has won awards, including the Canon Media Award for his work on the Len Brown/Bevan Chuang story. When he’s not creating the news, he tends to be in it, with protagonists using the courts, media and social media to deliver financial as well as death threats.

They say that news is something that someone, somewhere, wants kept quiet. Cam Slater doesn’t do quiet and, as a result, he is a polarising, controversial but highly effective journalist who takes no prisoners.

He is fearless in his pursuit of a story.

Love him or loathe him, you can’t ignore him.