Another Whaleoil prediction clocked up

As parliament ended for 2014, I predicted that Little would have an miraculous Holiday Makeover.  Well, it isn’t much of a prediction, it was a certainty.  He’s been flitting around social media, popping in at the Women’s mags, making small talk with journos…

But it was the prediction he would change his glasses to soften his look that I’m claiming some credit for.  This was before Christmas.


And ta-daaah, this is him now


His media minders are trimming the sails.

None of it will make any difference, but his minders will be so pleased with themselves.

David Cunliffe dyed his hair during the election.  I had photos to prove it, but there was so much else going on, it seemed to trivial to mention it.

Keep an eye on Little Andy during the year and see how his minders are going to make small changes that they are sure will bring Labour back from oblivion.


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  • George

    Changing the colour of your jersey doesn’t make you a better team.

    • Dave

      True, but if Angry Andy were to wear a blue shirt, tie or jersey I’m sure it would suit his complexion so much enter than red, and create much more attention for him.

  • Dumrse

    You can dye the hair, Botox the wrinkles, hang lighter glasses on his big honk and airbrush the rest but unfortunately there is nothing you can do with the inside of the container. It’s poked.

  • GoingRight

    Yep the face is the real problem, changing the glasses might get some to see him slightly differently but the face is of a hard, Little Angry man with bile in his heart and nothing will change that!

  • Warren Murray

    This is a little petty isn’t it? Invariably when they get higher up the greasy pole, they have a make over (although I can’t recall what extra ‘finishing’ JK had when he became Leader).

    As for Little’s glasses, at his age he would need to have his prescription updated every couple of years. Try doing that without getting new frames, it ain’t easy.

    The new specs do look better, just say’n…

    • “Try doing that without getting new frames, it ain’t easy”

      Not sure where you shop for your glasses, but I’ve had mine updated in the same frame twice now.

      As for being petty, it isn’t. It is part of image management. It shows that people have not enough sense of self that they think changing small things about their appearance will help.

      I’ve watched John Key grey, and he’s wearing it as it is. Phil Goff, David Cunliffe and now Andrew Little have all changed their appearance.

      It is very much pivotal to how they think. It shows a lack of understanding of what voters truly care about.

      • kayaker

        I’ve also had my glasses updated with new prescription lenses twice in five years – same frames.

    • Stuarts.burgers

      You need to tell the pushy sales person at the glasses shop No!! I want to use my old frames if not interested try some place else and mention the reason you are there.

  • Isherman

    Tip to stylists: Never underestimate the transformational power of a brown paper bag.
    Although that being said, if you cut out eye holes in a bag and popped it over his head, you end with paper- scissors-rock. The physical image could be softened somewhat I guess, for me its his speaking that’s his biggest issue.

    • stanace

      Could be accused of rustling!

  • Mick Ie

    They can improve the look of the man but it’s his mindset they need to improve, and they will never be able to achieve that.

  • Rex

    Sorry Angry but you still look, well ANGRY! Also humourless and devoid of personality. Where is his WIFE?

    • shykiwibloke

      Surrounded by security personnel taller than he that look more like union muscle doesnt help either

    • Tom

      He has a wife ?
      I thought he was another Helen Clark.

      • Rex

        I’m told he has a wife but for whatever reason she is never seen? Odd for a party leader. In saying that Robertson always kept Alf hidden.

        • Adam Michaels

          Yeh, he kept her completely hidden in his campaigning for a seat. Which is strange, because any budding politician needs the the team work from his/her partner if that person wants to be elected in the first place.It isn’t a one man/one woman band.

    • Hard1

      Andrew’s dear wife is a Catholic and prefers, wisely, to keep a low profile. Andy, being Agnostic, has spent his entire married life in delicate negotiation, as we all do, which has primed him nicely for whenever he needs to blow his cork in public.

  • shykiwibloke

    Small changes attract small minds

  • shykiwibloke

    Do a google image search, and type in ‘union boss’ – not one of the pictures has a politician-like smile. In fact Angry Andy would fit right in many of the shots – except hes a little on the trim side compared to some of the US union blokes.

  • Reid

    What they should do is dress him up to look vaguely like Santa and make him say ho ho ho a lot.

    I know it wouldn’t work on most of us but it probably would on the audience who watches TV1 and TV3 news.

    • Another Middleagedwhiteguy

      Around Christmas I was out front gardening, heard a voice saying ho ho ho but paid no attention. then again a bit louder – it was a “neighbourhood” person who obviously believed “ho ho ho” to be a form of greeting, and was just trying to be nice to this old honky.

  • HR

    Hey, it worked for Clark Kent.

  • Richard

    I’m going with a total lower mandible reconstruction.

    Extreme, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

  • Hard1

    Little will do so much for Maori that the least we can expect is a full face Ta Moko..

    • Stuarts.burgers

      Oh what a photo shop comp that could be.
      Do we going traditional or more modern like the Black Power and the Mongrel Mob.
      Maybe something from his union back ground, the Red Flag on left cheek ?

  • Effluent

    It’s not so much the face, but the expression on it – If you look at the photo in this post – he seems much less of a miserable sod.
    I wonder why.

  • Rodger T

    He appears perpetually bewildered,so who exactly is the puppet master and is he a glove puppet or a marionette?

  • timemagazine

    Nothing from the outside can change his inside. And this is what matters.

  • Bobb

    I think he should try smiling with his top teeth exposed rather than his lowers.

    Edt: Spelling

  • kayaker

    I predict botox (or some enhancement) around the lip area and on those lines either side of his snoz.

  • Genevieve
    He might like to have a look at the Winston Churchill style guide of Cuban cigars, cars and bow ties.

  • The2Game

    Hmmm, new glasses is just the first step. Next we’ll be having posters printed of him with straightened teeth, a smile that doesn’t make you edge in the direction of AWAY, airbrushed hair…

  • taurangaruru

    He’s got a long way to go to match Goff on stage on his hog & Cunliffe admitting he was sorry for being a man. “Little a new pair of specs doesn’t cut the mustard – what’s next in the bag of tricks?”

  • I.M Bach

    Pig-lipstick. Trough-snout.

  • Lord Evans

    He’s a clown, may as well dress like like one.

  • Sir Cullen’s Sidekick

    My spies tell me the new stylish glasses of Handy Andy has knocked off another percentage point off Labour’s already dismal polling…….

  • Sir Cullen’s Sidekick

    Ultimately he will be air brushed to look like this…

  • benniedawg

    I just can not get my head around him ever being PM of NZ. He looks like a guy that would be more suited to running a 4Square store, but not a political leader in waiting. He might appeal to the small town homelies but he just wont cut it in the corporate world. A lesson that labour has failed to grasp in recent times. Cardigan wearing leaders might have done it aka Lange etc but times have moved on. If they ever hope to have power back they are going to have to find someone who is smart, corporate and has a personality. Best they just give up now because I don’t see anyone meeting these requirements in the lineup they have at present.

  • Another Middleagedwhiteguy

    Only one sort of glasses might work – ones that don’t let people see the angry look in his eyes, nor be distracted by that unfortunate face nor by the uncomfortable voice. What he says doesn’t help much either.
    So, perhaps Gareth at Ratana provided a very welcome distraction and so Andy’s boring empty message was promptly forgotten instead of being pulled to bits?

  • Don O’Brien

    Try doing a Google Search on Images for Andrew Little. You will see that he has been using his “new Look” glasses as far back as September 2014