Hey fellas, are you a “Sitzpinkler”?


I’m amazed that this even went to court or there is even a debate in Germany over whether or not men are allowed to pee standing up.

But at least they seem to have some good judges there.

Men have the right to pee standing up in their own homes, a German court has ruled.

An Englishman’s home may be his castle, but in Germany the courts consider it their duty to rule on even the most intimate details of life at home.

The ruling comes after a landlord took his former tenant to court for refusing to pay for damage to the marble floor of the bathroom of his flat that he said was caused by stray drops from the tenant’s habit of relieving himself standing up.

It might seem standard practice for most men to take aim from a standing position, but some sections of German society have a bizarre obsession with obliging men to answer nature’s call while seated.

It is not uncommon to find home-made signs in German bathrooms commanding men to adopt a seated position.

What a bunch of panty-waists…commanding men to sit while peeing…pathetic.

The landlord complained that his tenant had caused €1,900 (£1,440) of damage to the floor of the bathroom. But the judge ruled on Thursday that the tenant had the right to take care of business standing up.

“Despite the increasing domestication of men in this regard, urinating while standing up is still widespread,” he wrote in a judgment which appeared at times to be a riposte to the claim that Germans have no sense of humour.

“Anyone who still practises this formerly dominant custom has to expect occasional clashes with their flatmates, particularly female ones. But they don’t have to worry about damage to the marble floor.”

Apparently blokes who sit while peeing are called “Sitzpinkler”.

Some toilets have red traffic-style signs forbidding the standing position – but those who choose to sit are often referred to as a “Sitzpinkler”, implying it is not masculine behaviour.

Here we are much less subtle…we just call them blouses.

I guess we need wonder no more why it was Germany lost both wars.


– Telegraph, BBC



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  • sandalwood789

    I’m a “stander” and proud of it….. :)

  • Murray Smith

    Gentlemen. stand closer.
    It’s shorter than you think.

  • David Moore

    Germans are weird.

    • Kash

      young boys are banned from standing up and peeing in Sweden…

  • caochladh

    There are some who should take heed of this when they have had a couple of drinks too many. There are those who urinate on their trousers and shoes, and some who just lose their balance and fall into the urinal. Not to mention those who manage to pee over you when you are standing beside them at a busy urinal.

  • oldmanNZ

    I have seen this in public places and especially places like the mall…
    Marble flooring tiles in the urinal area.
    Marble is porous, and does not like harsh chemicals, yey people put it on the floors, kitchen bench tops, and complains its been ruin by cleaning chemicals or urine?

    There are othertiles a bit more durable, or even thick vinyl flooring would be suitable.
    Females are not all that innocent ether, ive seen some dribbles when they quickly get off without letting it drip dry completely.

    • Richard

      You really shouldn’t pee on marble bench tops oldman.

  • john Doe

    How bizarre. This is one luxury that men have that women don’t. I intend to continue with this male only custom for as long as I can stand.

    • Cadwallader

      Not so. There is a device which women can use to pee standing up. I forget the name of it, but I am confident it would’ve been commonplace in past Labour caucus rooms.

      • MaryLou

        It’s a “She-Pee”

        • Cadwallader

          Was she an electorate member or on the List?

          • MaryLou

            Oh, we’re truly democratic. Fully elected!

        • Nic C

          No, ‘She-Wee’… the best office Secret Santa gift, bar none.

      • STAG


      • InnerCityDweller

        It’s called SheWee: http://www.shewee.co.nz/how-to/

        • Papillon

          Often used by women who enjoy fishing but not the sitting on a bucket to relieve themselves.

          • Cadwallader

            Who needs the Encyclopaedia Britannica when you can come here for an education!

      • Richard

        I heard Helen used to forgo this device anyway.

  • RightofSingapore

    Geez, do even loser countries like North Korea or Iran tell men how to pee? I’m surprised the Germans would have such fascist tendencies-oh wait…

  • Cadwallader

    I stand but when on rare occasions I hear of Labour’s “policies” I am liable to pee myself standing, collapsing or comatose.

  • STAG

    Its 3am, its dark, you’ve been woken from a deep sleep, your wife is asleep so the light is not an option, plus the brightness will kill you. You stumble to the toilet and try to aim in the pitch black by orientating yourself via Shin/toilet bowl contact and hope to hear the reassuring sound on a pee in water or the dreeded sprinkler effecft which means you desperatly try to reorentate yourself wth mixed and messy results. Are forced to turn the light on and clean everything up and then return to bed wide awke and cross.

    Or you sit, stay basically alseep and its the equivalent of a babies dream feed.

    • Nic C

      Granted Stag; the ‘one’ exception to the rule.

  • LabTested

    I had a urinal installed in the man cave. The gf was complaining that it was not a sit down toilet. She could not see the logic that it was unlikely there would be a woman in the room playing pool, watching test cricket & consuming steady quantities of beer all day. .and besides they key part if it being a man cave was…she wasn’t really invited.

  • Wallace Westland

    Ahhh..yes. The feminisation of men. Doesn’t matter where you look eh? Even in Germany,
    I wonder if they have changed their education system to one that markedly favours girls and is causing boys to fail miserably at school and no longer enter University?

  • Jaffa

    Piss Off!

    • ‘splash ya boots’

      • I.M Bach

        Years ago we were ejected from a party, so off we went. However one of my mates was ‘caught short’ and had to pee. He filled all the shoes lined up outside the back door. Splash your boots? Nah, fill ’em up.

  • Lord Evans

    Stand up for your rights blokes!

  • Phoenician

    The only hand-made sign in our toilet says “We don’t pee in your pool…. please don’t swim in our toilet”

    • I.M Bach

      I saw one on a blackboard above the urinal in the Greta Point hotel (Wgtn) in the 80’s; “Don’t look here for the joke, it’s in your hand.”

      • The Greta Point. Now that was a great boozer.

        • Cadwallader

          Apparently it was only about a foot outside a prohibition area of Wellington.

          • Dave_1924

            It was right on the boundary of the Mia mar dry zone before it was disestablishment. … A very good boozer

        • I.M Bach

          Lots of good times there. We had friends who owned a catamaran (The Golden Sunset) that used to tie up at the wharf. Fall out of the pub and onto the boat, brilliant. Unfortunately a mate of mine fell of it one night, hit the wharf with his head washed up the next day close by. RIP John.

  • Teletubby

    The Rules of Urinal Ettiquette are a wonderful piece of man only knowledge that men seem to have in their DNA and women just cannot understand.

  • Goldfish

    If I ever encounter one of those signs I will make a point of missing the toilet and deliberately hitting the sign. As a man it’s my prerogative.

    • Jaffa

      Depends how high up the sign is!

      • Nic C

        Not really… it just becomes a ‘challenge’ that one is duty bound to accept.

    • Cadwallader

      As a “Goldfish” be careful where you choose to swim!

  • mommadog

    That’s the one thing I really envy you guys for being able to do. Especially when your busting to go and you walk into a not so clean public toilet. Id love to have the anatomy to let it all hang out and aim instead of trying to crouch over and not touch the seat. Let the men stand I say (until you get really old and really shaky and you do pee all over the floor. Might be time to sit then)

    • Mark

      If women would get on with the whole evolving thing,there wouldn’t be a queue outside the ladies & women popping into the mens at large events LOL.
      We men do certainly have it good in that regard.

  • Nic C

    I’m pretty sure where I stand on this particular issue.

  • Albert Lane

    I did see a sign once that said “Gentlemen, please do not throw your cigarette butts in the urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light”.

  • damm good thrashing

    Almost makes you want to say you’re sorry for being a man……..nah.

  • Scotty

    I sit down when ive had too much to drink, or just go outside and find a bush or quiet corner to relieve myself in