Labour – it’s not Dirty Politics if you cut out the middleman

Nicky Hager defined Dirty Politics as politicians getting stories into the media for political purposes to attack their opponents by using bloggers.

But if policial parties get stories into the media to attack their opponents without using bloggers, that’s ok.

This is probably why Labour feel there is absolutely nothing wrong with this.





Credit where credit is due, Labour seem to have finally learned they can’t just make up some amorphous composite voter like Rufus Painter and then say they were talking to him just last week.

They are actually going to use real people now – pimping the poor to the media, so the media can pimp the poor to us.

In Hager’s world, people with stories to tell go to the newspaper.  The newspaper then investigates and asks for comments from the Political Parties.

How many Labour activists will hit the media with stories over the next weeks and months, paraded as some kind of random media encounters?

And no doubt, there will be zero disclosure that all of this is a Labour Dirty Politics hit.

Here’s a warning to anyone who wants to be famous using this Labour Party stitch-up:  you better lock your social media accounts down tight before you agree to be named, because our readers will be doing deep background checks on all of you to discover that you aren’t that hard up after all.

In fact, we’ll probably create a Labour Pimp The Poor Wall of Shame, for easy reference.   Might even put Andrew Little on top of it all as he started it off showing parliament that apart from still paying off his house, he’s got zero assets after earning a good million over the last 8 years or so.

It will also be interesting to see which media and which journos are going to be outed as the go-to guys and gals for Labour propaganda.


– Labour


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  • Sally

    They still might not be real people. Wonder if Labour will check that the name and email that are supplied in the survey are real before they share with the media.

    • rangitoto

      Vladimir Putin’s story will be interesting ;)

    • Christie

      Must admit, I put in a fake e-mail address – didn’t want to become targeted by the LP begging bowl. But I crashed out of it once they started asking if i would sell my story – even though my answers indicated I had no story to tell.

      • Michelle

        I wonder if it is a new funding strategy Labour pimp your story to the media party who pay you for story and Labour get a cut as well for finding the story
        They are desperate for funds and if the left do it then it is fine and media party don’t have to spend so much time interviewing their keyboards

  • Metricman

    I think its time for a new light bulb joke, come on whaleoilers, give it your best shot.

    Q) How many Labour Party Strategists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    A) ………

    • None, they will sit in the dark blaming John Key for being in cahoots with the BIG FOREIGN light bulb manufacturers.

      • Metricman

        Provisional Second prize, so far.

    • YankeeManu

      Two, one to change it and one to deny it.

    • Christie

      Just drop the last 4 words….

    • Depends, would this be registered or unregistered light bulb installers?

      • Metricman

        Registered absolutely, in fact they also need the undersecretary of the lightbulb installers registration board to observe, check their registration card and make sure that the installer does not do the job too quickly.

    • Dave

      None, they wouldn’t even know its blown, as they have no money for electricity left, and they are used to life on the dark sdie

    • Urbanviper

      It really would depend if they are energy efficient bulbs or not. But to take the question more seriously you need a H&S delegate to check the ladder, double check the light is turned off and the bulb is energy efficient. You then need the person responsible if anything goes wrong (the scape goat) to oversee the task. You then have two people holding the ladder and one person, the light bulb technician (unionized) to climb the ladder. You of course also need the union delegate so for eases sake it would be one of the people holding the ladder. So 5 minimum.

      • Metricman

        You left out the media consultant in case the new bulb actually works, and to explain why its John Key’s fault that they had to change the bulb in the first place. I am sure that there is probably more……………

      • Lemuzz

        Don’t forget everyone to wear fluro jackets so you can see if they are moving

      • chwaga

        But..but..but you are not allowed to use ladders. For H & S reasons they are not allowed on site so you will need a whole think tank to work out how to get to the light socket

    • richard.b

      None, they are all out looking for the missing million.

    • Tiger

      A) 3 – one to find a lightbulb made in new Zealand, one to kneel down so he can climb on his back to insert said lightbulb and the third to explain to them both that they forgot to pay the electricity bill – and it is all JKs fault!

    • Seriously?

      None: Sorry, that is maintenance work and no Strategist are members of the right union for that stuff.

    • Isherman

      A) It doesn’t matter how many they use, it wont make any difference because the bulb is fine. It would just be typical Labour to blame the bulb being broken, when the problem is that they actually don’t know where the switch is.

      • Metricman

        Brilliant (pardon the pun) you get the provisional first prize, so far.

    • Rick H

      Labour is “Unions”, right?
      No strategists would be allowed to touch a lightbulb unlesss they were in the “Electricians Union” – if they do so, all will be out on strike.

  • Graham Pilgrim

    This is just so tacky, so crude, and needs to be totally exposed for what it is – desperation.

    • biscuit barrel

      All parties do it. You surely know that.

      • Graham Pilgrim

        Firstly, that doesn’t make it any more acceptable, and secondly, in 70 years, I have never received a Party Political publication from ANY party asking me if I’m prepared to share my “story” with the media. Not until today!

      • KGB

        I have been a member of the National party for many years. I have never received an email like that, ever.

  • XCIA

    Dear god, they are going to assemble another army of dreamers who think they are entitled to everything they perceive they should have without doing the hard yards for it. They won’t find their missing million this way, because all those who come forward will already be card carrying members.

  • Muffin

    I look forward to the public disection of their stories here on WO.

  • Urbanviper

    I suppose it would be unethical to feed them the least imaginable stories possible to see how low they go? “I live in a box under Victoria Bridge in Hamilton and refuse to eat anything other than sardines. I’ve been kicked off the benefit by that evil ZHonkey (personally) and now have to turn tricks for my sardine addiction. I’ll never be able to afford a house at this rate.”

  • Dan

    What a way to find people to beat their drum. Remember the good old days when if there was a problem and you were facing hardship or felt hard done by, you could rock on up to your MPs office and they would assist? I know our local MP helped my parents with issues once or twice. That surely is what an elected MP does right?

    But now we have list MPs with no mandate from the electorate rather from a mob of like minded people (both sides of the House it should be added) who don’t seem to put in the hard yards that an electorate MP or their staff do. So they instead sit in offices and…survey.

    Or is Labour’s problem is lack of electorate offices around the country, and in particular, Auckland. Is is because they have no day-to-day experience with the electorate that they must resort to sending smoke signals for help? Is it that lack of ground crew that means that complaints and concerns are going to the Electorate MP’s office, which statistically speaking, is more unlikely to be one batting for their team? If so then not only are the people not listening to them, but they are not going to them either.

    Labour is an isolated, some say idilic, Island. Robinson Crusoe is its leader, desparately searching for the million that are man-Friday. Many bottles have been lauched from that beach, but still crusoe awaits, yearning for the rescue ship.

  • kayaker

    I filled this survey out. I replied Yes to the question (the one before 18) “would you be willing to tell your story?” Then I replied No to questions 18-21. After that, it was K.Thanks/bye – no opportunity to tell my story!

  • Brian Dingwall

    Presumably they go to these lengths to find people to pimp because no-one is coming to their electorate offices, clinics etc… few in number are they only the interweb can find them…..