Oh come on Paxman, they are world champions at marching backwards


Jeremy Paxman has attacked the cheese-eating surrender monkeys.

French is a “useless language” and the nation’s achievements are “long past”, Jeremy Paxman has claimed, in a brutal attack on our European neighbours.

The former Newsnight host said that middle-class Britons should end their “forelock-tugging” deference to France’s haute cuisine and high-speed trains, as he claimed that the centuries-old battle between the two nations had been comprehensively decided in Britain’s favour.

Writing in the Financial Times, Paxman said French was a “useless language”. He wrote: “Let us block our ears to the middle-class English and their forelock-tugging deference to France’s highly subsidised rural living, high-speed trains and ‘marvellous food’.

“No one is going to deny that, historically, France has enhanced civilisation. European culture would be a thin thing without Montaigne, Descartes, Debussy and Cézanne, to say nothing of the dictator’s dictator, Napoleon Bonaparte.  

“The problem is that it is all long past and the new world is anglophone. In the centuries-long struggle between English and French there is one victor, and to pretend otherwise is like suggesting that Johnny Hallyday is the future of pop.

“The outcome of the struggle is clear: English is the language of science, technology, travel, entertainment and sport. To be a citizen of the world it is the one language that you must have.”

In another stinging attack, the presenter said the French government’s decision to fund the study of French in North African nations was akin to a “form of imperialism”.

He added: “The truth is that while other imperial powers were running down their flags around the world, France never really decolonised.”

The piece is likely to raise eyebrows at the BBC. Paxman has been commissioned to present what the broadcaster has billed as “an impartial look” at Britain’s relationship with Europe, as part of the corporation’s EU referendum coverage.

He forgot that the French perfected the art of moving targets for long-bows during the Hundred Years War, showed us the value of fortresses and bunkers to protect the border in 1914 and 1939 and, of course, they are the world champions at marching backwards. French tanks, of course, are world-renowned for having more reverse gears than forward gears and their rifles are prized as collectors’ items because they’ve never been fired and only dropped once.

Lastly, they did give us the two immutable rules of French warfare:

  1. The French only win when not led by a Frenchman (Joan of Arc was a woman and Napoleon Bonaparte was a Corsican), and
  2. The French only win when the foreigners do the fighting (WW1, WW2, French Foreign Legion).

Other than all that, Paxman is spot on.


– The Telegraph

Do you want ad-free access to our Daily Crossword?

Do you want access to daily Incite Politics Magazine articles?

Silver Subscriptions and above go in the draw to win a $500 prize to be drawn at the end of March

Not yet one of our awesome subscribers? Click Here and join us.

As much at home writing editorials as being the subject of them, Cam has won awards, including the Canon Media Award for his work on the Len Brown/Bevan Chuang story.  And when he’s not creating the news, he tends to be in it, with protagonists using the courts, media and social media to deliver financial as well as death threats.

They say that news is something that someone, somewhere, wants kept quiet.   Cam Slater doesn’t do quiet, and as a result he is a polarising, controversial but highly effective journalist that takes no prisoners.

He is fearless in his pursuit of a story.

Love him or loathe him.  But you can’t ignore him.