Alan Duff is right, real men don’t beat up kids

Alan Duff has another ripper in the Herald:

We can’t let Moko Rangitoheriri’s death be forgotten – or be a vengeful mob storming the Taupo police cells to lynch Moko’s evil killers.

One of many marches around the country took place in Lower Hutt and there were some brave men who spoke out. I quote Anaru Moke: “I was bashed myself. Who wasn’t?” He says he’s breaking the cycle with his own 11 children. He’s a Mob member. Good on him for speaking out. Here’s Star Olsen: “I knew I had to say something that was at the pit of my stomach. The hardest word for some Maori males to say is sorry.” Including when they just helped torture and murder a child.

It’s a waste of breath to scream that vile punishments should be inflicted on Tania Shailer, 26, and David Haerewa, 46. We’d just be drawn into an endless cycle of violence begetting more violence. But we Maori have to ask why we totally dominate statistics in the killing of more than 200 infants in the past two decades. Why us? The leaders – I mean the cowardly ones staying silent and not joining any of the marches, the ones flying business class to dubious “conferences” overseas – will never do anything to help change the significant percentage of Maori at the bottom of the heap from falling further down into the abyss.

Some Maori have no moral values because they’re not taught them. Violence is perfectly acceptable behaviour, indeed admired; whether it’s king-hitting a stranger in a pub, beating up the wife or partner, thrashing their children.

Violence begets violence. Children learn from the example set by their elders. Unfortunately many Maori elders are remaining silent on the tragic fact that Maori are nearly 4 times more likely to abuse their kids than any other race.

It is no use Maori being silent and liberal white handwringers wailing in faux pain at the outcomes we are witnessing.

Families should be issued books on parenting. It must be instilled in everyone’s brains from a young age that certain behaviours are totally unacceptable. Love must be taught as the founding base for a successful family. Education as the way forward. Every act of violence except in self-defence must be socially outlawed, considered a shameful let-down of the entire community.

Cultural leaders should review the entire kapa haka syllabus, I believe. I’m sick of the screaming, eye-popping haka. The standard of predictable, simplistic singing should be lifted. In everyday life, my opinion is girls should be brought up like the French are: to be feminine, take a pride in how they dress, walk with dignity and grace wherever they go out in public and always keep the standards. Boys should be taught to respect females.

Every Maori should get to parenting age knowing a whole set of values on how best to raise a child. It should have been burned into their consciousness that sacrifices for your children are not only an obligation, but a sacred duty.

We have inter-generational retardation of parenting skills in some sectors of our community. It really won’t save anyone having the state now stand in as parents, yet that is what welfarism has delivered. The state feeds their kids, clothes their kids, schools their kids, teaches their kids sex education…parent seemingly have to do less and less. But the problem with abrogating parenting responsibilities to the state is that the state does very little well, if at all.

The vast majority of Maori saw the movie based on my book. I went from zero to hero in just a few weeks. Why? Because every Maori – most of whom had not read the book – came out of the theatre in a state of shock and said, “Yeah? What’s the problem? That was our life up on the screen.” Everyone had a Jake as a father, older brother, any number of uncles. Some were women.

Why oh why are we pushing this societal model and calling it our Renaissance? It is no such thing. It is simply a perpetuation of a culture that is irrelevant to this age. We need an outlook of always encouraging our children. Not discouraging, running the kids’ efforts down. From day one at primary school, Maori children should be indoctrinated that it is not done to discourage others from having aspirations.

And someone has to point out that cultural activities do not get them a job or a mortgage.

Uh huh.

I am going to ask our Duffy Books in Homes trustees if we can produce some books on parenting to be given out free to all 100,000 homes on our programme. It just can’t go on like this, waiting for the next headline: another child – invariably Maori – tortured and murdered.

March, Maori, march. And change your ways. Real men apologise. Real men look in the mirror and change. Real men don’t beat up kids or wives or anyone else. Real men love. And their children, wives and society advance with them.

No they don’t. Real men do something, and Alan Duff is walking the talk, now if only we could get senior Maori to just even talk instead of running off to the Human Rights Commission complaining of racism.

 

– NZ Herald

 


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  • JEL51

    Well which of the well known, $Tax funded (I’m so offended) spokes people will stand-up with Allan? We all would like to hear those beautiful, melodic voices singing in harmony, return. They have been gone for too long.

  • Totara

    Alan has quite rightly touched upon the subject of the haka.

    Around 2010/early-2011, there was some talk about how the traditional haka was actually detrimental as a role model to Maori kids. Some forward-looking Maori leaders at the time were even developing new hakas that didn’t have the same level of overt violence. But then along came the 2011 Rugby World Cup, and Ka Mate, Ka Mate went back to the forefront.

    If you look at young kids from low socioeconomic backgrounds in early childhood education, Ka Mate, Ka Mate is often what they really identify with, and get into; plenty of teachers think that that they are fulfilling their bicultural requirements by promoting it; and all that it is doing is just entrenching the ‘warrior’ role model of Once were Warriors.

  • johnandali

    Yes, we should issue books. And that’s one of the major problems. Many Maori homes do not have a book in them. Not even a kids’ book. That’s why many Maori kids start school without ever having seen a book. And how could that be? It’s due to inherited illiteracy. And how many Maoris are illiterate? To the best of my knowledge, there are no statistics, only guesses. The only way to put things right is to break the cycle. And iwi leadership is not sufficient. You may recall in the late 1990’s that the Hoani Waititi Marae and one other took a case to the High Court asking that the two maraes be given the status of iwi in respect of the Treaty. This proposal was most vehemently opposed by the iwi leaders, and the case was lost. And why was the case taken to court in the first place? It was because in the post-WW2 era, South Auckland and Porirua became industrial areas, and they needed an unskilled labour force. Maori people flocked to these areas for work, and gradually, over the years, they have lost contact with their iwi/hapu, have intermarried with people from other tribes, and consequently they have no Maori culture. The two maraes wanted to correct that, and by becoming Treaty participants, they would have the resources to instil Maoridom into those disaffected people who predominantly live in the urban areas. And yes, the case was lost, and those disaffected Maoris are still disaffected Maoris. So Alan, if you want to break the cycle of Maori failures, talk to the right people. Have the case reconsidered. Bring the thousands upon thousands of disaffected Maoris back into the culture, and once that happens, you then have access to the children who can be targetted to break the cycle of welfare dependency and educational failures. Alan, you know people in the right places. Talk to them. Talk to the two maraes in question. You can make things happen. Please make things happen
    .

  • Dave

    “You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make them drink” You can give every household in NZ many books, you could pay them to read it, but alas, the ones that need the words, the advise the most, will not read it. Great article Alex, and admiration for tackling the issue, and speaking out, one of the TRUE leaders.

    Firstly, there needs to be MORE acceptance, then the healing can start. Please keep yelling from every rooftop Alex.

  • phronesis

    Plenty of people would have us believe that what is needed is more Maori culture. Just a bit more celebration of violence like the haka. A bit more learning a dead language in which nothing worth reading has ever been written. A bit more money to promote maori identity and suddenly all will be well. I think any dispassionate analysis of Maori history and culture would indicate that it is part of the problem and not the solution.

    I don’t buy the argument that it is the loss of their culture that has sent them feral. I don’t speak the same language as my parents grew up speaking. I don’t worship the same God(s) that my ancestors worshipped. I am part of this society and I act like it.

  • Ruahine

    Allan Duff makes an interesting comment regarding the strength of femininity and he mentions France. I agree you see this in action in public activities and observations having spent time there with a number English speaking French people.

  • papagaya

    Until the sole parent support benefit is phased out except for the neediest of cases, Maori child murders will continue to be high. You can’t pay feral young numbskulls to have baby after baby without the worst of consequences. It is the most misused welfare payout in the country. The fact that dare not speak its name: almost all the perps are beneficiaries. Unfortunately we don’t have a government that’s prepared to be cruel to be kind.

  • Usaywot

    I have mentioned before how much I detest the haka. I cringe with embarrassment every time a visiting dignitary is subjected to the tongue poking, eye popping, bare back sided welcome they get. It is just unbelievably insulting to most other cultures. Why, oh why have we let this develop into an official welcome? Leave it on the rugby field if you must incite the opposition to violence but please don’t use it to represent me a fifth generation NZer.

  • digby

    Bravo Alan Duff. It would be very interesting to see the difference in responses from the Maori community / MSM / the labour/green pc brigade if this were said by a middle / upper class white male.

  • taxpayer

    Well, what more can you say.
    Please don’t go back to France Mr Duff, NZ needs you.

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