Daddy left home and now the kiddies are worried that Mummy will leave too

The National party caucus are acting like a bunch of blouses and sooks.

The pitch from Bill English is that if they vote for him then it is steady as she goes. Except it won’t be. I know of one person who has been asked to declare publicly for Bill English on the promise of a ministerial portfolio. The dimwitted fool believed Bill, until it was pointed out to him that for that to happen someone has to get bulleted. Quick as a flash he pointed out that Coleman for sure will get bulleted and probably Judith Collins, so he’s alright jack.

This is classic broken family scenarios. Matthew Hooton came up with this idea on Radio Live this morning, and I’ve decided it fits perfectly.

Daddy has been keeping the family together through a mixture of fear and love. But Daddy has had enough and packed his bags and left. Mummy is left and trying to hold the family together.

Caucus are mewling like cut cats that there is too much change and that if Mummy goes too then so does Cousin Gerry, poor retarded Cousin Nick and Uncle Steve as well. They don’t want a broken family so they are contemplating staying with Mummy even though she is dead set useless at organising the family with the sole exception of the finances.

There is a problem with their little fantasy that Bill will keep the family together…he has a history of fratricide. He also went on the list so in the event of a bad election result he can bolt quicker than everyone else. If he is leader then a bad election result is guaranteed.

The caucus seems to think that they are still in a John Key led government but without Dad…he’s “overseas”.

The National party is in desperate need of renewal, especially as they are going into a possible fourth term up against a Labour party that is populated with pensioners like Annette King and old useless MPs like Trevor Mallard.

National would be better for it with change.

Mind you with Bill English they will get change, the only difference being that change is likely to be at the expense of the very fools who voted him as leader.

The caucus needs to show courage and not fall for the emotional blackmail and tactics of Bill English and Michelle Boag.

The final irony is that it is another list MP, who is actually bolting, Hekia Parata, who is doing the strong arming of the children.

Grow the fuck up and exercise your democratic rights under the party constitution to have a vote.

Bill English doesn’t want a vote, he wants a sure thing and that is why he is putting out lies that he has plenty of numbers. That is bullshit and the person whispering those numbers lied to Patrick Gower.

The funny thing is he was named as a supporter of Judith Collins and rang Newshub to insist they correct the record, thereby outing himself as a Bill English supporter. The fact they described him as a senior MP and not a minister says it all. It is one of the whips.

The family isn’t broken, the children have grown up and it is time to adjust living arrangements.


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As much at home writing editorials as being the subject of them, Cam has won awards, including the Canon Media Award for his work on the Len Brown/Bevan Chuang story. When he’s not creating the news, he tends to be in it, with protagonists using the courts, media and social media to deliver financial as well as death threats.

They say that news is something that someone, somewhere, wants kept quiet. Cam Slater doesn’t do quiet and, as a result, he is a polarising, controversial but highly effective journalist who takes no prisoners.

He is fearless in his pursuit of a story.

Love him or loathe him, you can’t ignore him.

To read Cam’s previous articles click on his name in blue.

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