Why is everyone dumping on the Aussies?

Duncan Garner is the latest media luvvie to dump on the Aussies for wanting to protect their borders and internal systems, like education.

Time to face a stark reality: if you think we’re somehow special to the Aussies – you’re dreaming.

It’s quaint to think we might still be united by the Anzac spirit, but sorry we’re not. Wake up New Zealand. Time to suck it up.   

Yes, we have much in common but I’ve always regarded us as having more soul, heart, compassion and less arrogance than the Aussies. They’re loud and brash.

I was reporting at our Parliament a few years back when then Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard strode onto the floor and described us as “family”.

Everyone walked away impressed. It was a master stroke of marketing and political spin. It deserved to be called out at the time as utter codswallop.

Since 2002 Kiwis living in Australia have largely been treated like any other bugger crossing the border. We’re really now no different to a Lebanese or Chinese family entering Australia. We’re Kiwis – it means nothing to them.

In many ways, it’s our fault. More than 500,000 Kiwis live in Australia and at times we’ve stuck out like a sore thumb. The Aussies resent paying benefits to the cliched tattooed Kiwis lying on Queensland and Bondi beaches. I know it’s a generalisation but it’s their generalisation.

John Howard pulled a swifty 15 years ago when he targeted Kiwis in Australia and Helen Clark called an urgent meeting and she called it a “win-win”. How she came to that conclusion I still have no idea. I’m still looking for our “win”.

Since then it’s been a tough relationship to keep up. The dog left the porch years ago. We haven’t divorced but we’ve certainly separated and the family counselling isn’t working.

Let’s look at this moaning.

  1. The ANZAC spirit has nothing whatsoever to do with anything other than the military. Their forebears were chosen by the best judges in England to live in Australia, ours came here of their own volition.
  2. Julia Gillard knows about as much about ‘family’ as Helen Clark.
  3.  Clearly journalists in the gallery are easily impressed. It is probably why they are mostly wrong.
  4. Kiwis are foreign citizens in Australia. As we should be. We should do the same and stop being precious idiots.
  5. Kiwis who bolted to Australia, or anywhere else in the world for that matter still think where they live should treat them like Kiwis…they are wrong. They are foreigners.
  6. John Howard didn’t pull a swifty. He did what he needed to do for a domestic audience. If anyone let New Zealand down it was Helen Clark, who shrugged her shoulders and as she was wont to say frequently…”Moved on”.

It is quite pathetic really that media and others blame the Aussies. This has mostly come about because our immigration policies have been lax, and temporary Kiwis up and leave for Australia once they get their Permanent Residency. Then there are all the bludgers who left here for better bludging prospects over there. Lastly there were all the Kiwis who left here to enter the promised land of Australia only to find that it wasn’t promised, mining industry jobs are prone to global downturns and there are two economies in Australia, the mining economy, and the coastal city economy, neither of which are that flash. Oh, and I forget their draconian tax regime.

John Key had some minor and hard-fought victories. But new Foreign Minister Gerry Brownlee and PM Bill English have just been completely blindsided by Australia’s education changes affecting Kiwis. They got 24 hours notice. So much for the “family”.

And that’s my beef. Our Cabinet ministers are not in the loop and look impotent and ineffectual. The Aussies don’t consider us important enough to bring us into the mix earlier.

Uhmmm…Aussie ministers aren’t in the loop with our policy changes either. Why do people expect that Australia should inform NZ about changes? If I was the Aussies I wouldn’t either because all you get in return is howling air raid sirens of whinging. When did we become so gay and pathetic?

Australia is a sovereign country and they have every right to do what they’re doing. Should we retaliate? No. We don’t need to no matter how tempting it is.

Also remember Australia gets more immigrants than us. They’re also facing a massive domestic backlash against migrants.

And they’re billions of dollars in the drink too. The Aussies need to find budget savings and must put their own people first.

Uh huh. So why the whinging Dunc?

Go to Aussie these days and you know what you’re in for. They’re basically a hard-arsed pack of pricks who are putting themselves first.  You shouldn’t be surprised.

You’d know…have you been looking in the mirror?

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