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Great Headlines

A long time ago in a national news media galaxy far, far away, people actually trusted the news. These days, a lot of people would argue that the mainstream media really isn’t all that different from infamous tabloid publications like “World Weekly News” or “National Enquirer” and this list of funny and weird tabloid headlines prove just that. Well, they don’t really prove anything.  Tabloid headlines have never proven anything… accept that completely made up news will always be far more entertaining than the real thing.

 The Weekly World News existed because the owner of the National Enquirer switched to colour printing, but he didn’t want to throw away a perfectly good black and white press. Eddie Clontz was the managing editor of the Weekly World News during much of its run. He had a philosophy for his newsroom: “Don’t fact check yourself out of a good story.” The WWN took each ridiculous claim it was presented with the as unshakable truth (you can still get your bizarre “news” fix at WWN’s website).

Sticky situation. I rubber stamp this headline as a work of genius.

The Daily Mirror, May 24, 2011
Ryan Giggs, a Manchester United star, tried to take out an injunction to stop the papers from publishing details of his extra-marital affair. They responded with this.

Tragedy struck Kim Kardashian last night on a private flight from New Jersey to Las Vegas. Her left butt cheek exploded.

Easy, tiger. Two puns for the price of one here. Serves him right for chasing all those birdies.

Beastly goings-on…

Armagh Gazette, April 19, 2013

Uncredited, May 26, 2012
As if the world wasn’t hard enough on BlackBerry already…

Who’s the big man now? Chicago Sun-Times, December 16, 2003. The Sun-Times doesn’t offer this story online. Maybe it’s a mark of being the bigger person.

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