What would they do if seaweed on beaches became a campaign issue?

If the outrage about seaweed on beaches became a campaign issue this election the Labour Party, would arrange for some volunteer interns from overseas to come and clean them up in exchange for slum standard accommodation at a local Marae.

The Green Party would put a fence around the beach and would ban the seaweed from landing in New Zealand.

The Act Party would privatise the beach and make the seaweed users pay.

The National Party would promise to clean up beaches but only in National held seats.

United Future’s Peter Dunne would complain about the seaweed to Wellington City Council. They would then ignore him.

via righttolife.co.nz

The Maori party would complain equally about both the National Party and the Labour Party’s  plans but when the fuss dies down they would support National.

Māori Party co-leader Marama Fox. Photo: RNZ / Craig McCulloch

The Opportunities Party would provide a detailed economic spreadsheet explaining why non-beach users should pay more than beach users towards the cost of removing the seaweed. Gareth Morgan would then explain why this is fair.

The Conservative party would take photos of its leader lying seductively in the seaweed while announcing its intention to sue the seaweed if it continues to pile up on the beach.

The New Zealand First Party leader would have a nice on-air chat to a little old lady about how much she enjoys collecting seaweed to put on her garden and how beautiful her roses are this time of year.

via 3 News

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