He’s dreamin’: Gareth Morgan says TOP will get 10 per cent

I’m not sure if we should write him off as a total political retard or we should go easy on him because he’s a special needs case.

Gareth Morgan says the Green Party’s recent troubles could be his party’s gain, as disillusioned greenies will be shopping around for a new environmentally-minded party.

Morgan’s fledgling party officially launched its election campaign today in Wellington with little fanfare.

The event was held in an understated church hall in the CBD. Around 60 people attended and of those, 20 were candidates and 15 were media.

Morgan, in T-shirt and suit jacket, entered the room to the tune of a pop song: “Everything is going to be all right”.

Not to be rude, but I can get 30 people to turn up to hear me speak in Wellington.  And depending on the topic, if I debated Nicky Hager for example, there would be 15 media as well.   (The offer still stands Nicky – name the place and time.)   But back to the phenomenon that’s the The Opportunities Party party.  (Marketing tip:  Don’t call your party something party.  It gets awkward).    

He admitted that despite securing 4000 paid-up members, TOP’s main barrier to election was getting noticed above the better-funded, old parties. It was depending largely on the “viral spread” of its policies online.

Asked who was voting for him, Morgan said his supporters were not just youngsters drawn to ideas like a basic income of $200 a week. Many of them were parents or grandparents who had generational concerns, like their kids getting locked out of the property market or facing the uncertainty of a more casualised workforce.

That was the key message in his speech – that New Zealand was once a place which prided itself on a “fair deal” and ensured that each generation was better off than the last.

“Something has gone terribly wrong with that idea,” he said.

“The current generation, the baby boomers, may be the first to leave behind a New Zealand of shrinking opportunities, less fairness and more inequality than they were born into.”

Gareth Morgan has an epic case of Privileged White Guilt.  It made him visit North Korea and come back with ideas as to how to create a better world.  A world where people starve to death after eating bugs and grass.

But ten percent?  Not in our reality he won’t.   For that to happen, his policies will need to go so damn viral that the WHO will step in and shut it down before it becomes a global pandemic.

The really sad thing is to watch this grown up man take all this seriously.  He really believes he’s making a difference.

In the end, he will be able to say one thing:  at least he tried.


– Isaac Davison, NZ Herald


THANK YOU for being a subscriber. Because of you Whaleoil is going from strength to strength. It is a little known fact that Whaleoil subscribers are better in bed, good looking and highly intelligent. Sometimes all at once! Please Click Here Now to subscribe to an ad-free Whaleoil.