Paper road

 

Well there’s a one thing a Kiwi Cockey hates

and that’s missing his alarm bell and waking up late

cause the cows can’t milk themselves you know

and those Townies they won’t wait,

So I ran out the back to the shed one day

as I’m hopping on the tractor to pick up all the hay

and I have a look around me but come what may

there were no cows in sight,

So Blue, Whatcha gonna do

when the cows run free and the sheep shoot through?

Poor Blue what’s a Cockey gonna do

about that Paper Road?

The Townies come down because they’re liking the sound

of that fresh country air and to have a look around

but they never leave the gate the same way it’s found

and it surely makes a man blue,

Cause manners don’t cost and if you can’t pick your way

if your needle sings north but your map won’t say

then at least take the time out of your busy day

to put the latch back on the gate,

So Blue, Whatcha gonna do

when the cows run free and the sheep shoot through?

Poor Blue what’s a Cockey gonna do

about that Paper Road?

So I had a little think and I used some guile

with a setting up an ambush S.A.S style

as I hid down in that Flax bush by the creek,

And I squatted there alone through the cold wet nights

with a black bead on in me telescopic sight

and I never made a sound not even a squeak or a peak,

As the weeks flew by with a blinking of an eye

and I never moved once from me Flax Mai Mai

until one fine day I finally spotted my prey,

An R.V. Mac pulled up on the track

with a yelling and a screaming from the nippers in the back

as the joker filed out and opened up the gate,

Well I leapt from the ground with a hell of a sound

and I jabbered and I jabbered and I hollered all around

and the joker by the gate he turned on his heels and fled,

So I felt pretty pleased as I walked back home

I took the back fence and I gave the dog a bone

and relaxed in me rocking chair with a nice cold beer,

and started singing

So Blue, Whatcha gonna do

when the cows run free and the sheep shoot through?

Poor Blue what’s a Cockey gonna do

about that Paper Road?

Now the moral of the story if there is one I spose

if you open up a gate you wanna leave it closed

cause there’s always a lot of hard yakka to be done out back,

Because the cows can’t milk themselves you know

and the bloody Ewes are hopeless they’ll just follow their nose

and they’ll stagger away ‘n’ get lost up the old goat track,

They’re gonna follow the leader all the way down the risky crack

And they’ll disappear and they’ll never ever bloody come back

Get back!

Get in!

Get inside I won’t tell ya again!

 


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ORANGE

  • A large round juicy citrus fruit with a tough bright reddish-yellow rind.

AMBER

  • Hard translucent fossilized resin originating from extinct coniferous trees of the Tertiary period, typically yellowish in colour. It has been used in jewellery since antiquity.

ORINJAMBA

  • Fifth generation Kiwi, social-political writer who left the Left sometime back and turned right. Heavily reliant on spell check with hopefully the intelligence to admit when he’s wrong and the humility to see the truth, irrespective of where it’s found.

To read my previous articles click on my name in blue.

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