The truth about Obama… in the Herald!!!

John Key and Barack Obama enjoy a round of golf in Hawaii

Wonders will never cease. A columnist at the NZ Herald has a piece about Obama that provides some balance to the wet-panty stories written in the past week:

The Mighty O is here!

No, I’m not taking Roy Orbison, for obvious reasons, Oprah, or, the very taboo, orgasm (can I even use that word?)

I mean Obama … or should that be Oh bummer?

Forgive me for not falling over myself in utter wonderment and sycophantic hero-worship, at his arrival, and at the risk of becoming less popular than I already am, what’s the big deal and more specifically, what’s to celebrate?   

Not much, actually. Other media made utter gooses of themselves getting sticky knickers over the world’s best gun salesman.

His expense to New Zealand tax-payer? His costly drain on the severely under-resourced New Zealand police? The constant mindless headlines of where he’s been spotted. What rubbish bin or public toilet he made use of. What jewels his putters are encrusted with or how low the carbon footprint of his Gulfstream jet is.

Has Michelle come with him to give Cinders lessons on how to plant a veggie garden at the PM’s residence or perhaps share hints on how to host an ab fab Easter egg hunt in parliament grounds?

With the promise, of course of no sexual harassment or the serving of alcohol to minors!

Comedy at its best or what?

That is a whole heap of sarc right there.

A smiler, a nodder, and a well-seasoned fence-sitter, he told the people what they wanted to hear.

He may be the epitome of the genuine nice guy, on a personal level, but as a politician, it’s my opinion that Obama was about as ineffective and unremarkable as he could be.

A bit like his golfing partner. Even Phil Twyford had to admit that.

For the first Black Prez (is that descriptor acceptable?) he couldn’t have been more vanilla if he tried. Afraid to rock the boat, he was little more than a nodding mouthpiece, like those retro rear window dog ornaments from the 60’s and 70’s. Someone needs to revive those little buggers, with trendy breeds like Labradoodles!

I digress.

Let’s get real here. We’re talking about the US president with the MOST SCHOOL SHOOTINGS, in history EVER, under his belt, yet Donald Trump’s personal politics gets blamed for just one.

And the world’s best gun salesman. Since Trump has come in there have been quite a few Chapter 11 bankruptcies of gun makers. Obama was good for the gun business.

Harvey Weinstein was, if allegations are correct, offending pre-Trump: ie in Obama’s days but it’s the Trump style misogyny that is used to add weight to the #metoo movement.

Yep, it appears Trump’s responsible for all the sexual crimes that pre-date his presidency yet Obama and Bill Clinton appear completely blameless.

I wonder whatever happened to Monica Lewinsky?

Still scrubbing stains off her dress? No, she’s actually feels lucky that she hasn’t wound up dead like so many other Clinton adversaries.

A freak lone gunman kills civilians in Las Vegas on Donald’s watch … the subsequent vitriol is as damaging to Trump as the bullets yet the Batman Movie Massacre and Boston Marathon bombing are NEVER attributed to Obama’s presidency. Strange that.

Had his wife not put in so many appearances on the Ellen De Generes Show, he would probably have not secured a second term.

But let’s thump Trump in the hope the mindless will be distracted from the truth. I’m surprised that Trump hasn’t yet been held responsible for the death of Stephen Hawking … with his fringe/combover being hailed as the real “big bang” that killed him.

Naturally, the pig-ignorant will wrongly assume that if I’m against one I must be for the other.

You don’t need to be a Trump-eter to expect a modicum of balance and fairness in reporting. It’s the Libra and those scales of justice coming out in me.

I can only hope our government sticks to its transparency claims and we get to see the real dollar cost of hosting this supposed hero of the free world.

Just as I hope Obama’s Gulfstream comes complete with plenty of vomit bags … because those scrambling to kiss his a*se will need them.

It seems only fitting to end with a hashtag inspired by Muppets.

#obamanahdodoodododo. Smile loudly.

I imagine she is now in police supervision and likely to have ended her columnist career at the Herald after this one was let through to the keeper. I can hear the howls of outrage from NZME newsroom from here.

-NZ Herald

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As much at home writing editorials as being the subject of them, Cam has won awards, including the Canon Media Award for his work on the Len Brown/Bevan Chuang story. When he’s not creating the news, he tends to be in it, with protagonists using the courts, media and social media to deliver financial as well as death threats.

They say that news is something that someone, somewhere, wants kept quiet. Cam Slater doesn’t do quiet and, as a result, he is a polarising, controversial but highly effective journalist who takes no prisoners.

He is fearless in his pursuit of a story.

Love him or loathe him, you can’t ignore him.

To read Cam’s previous articles click on his name in blue.