The current crop of political incompetents: Part one

Jacinda Ardern is the minister for national security and intelligence.

She seems to have taken national security so seriously that she has forgotten that she promised an open and transparent government. As for intelligence, I assume that she is still looking for some.
Being the minister of arts, culture and heritage doesn’t seem an appropriate portfolio for a fish and chip wrapper from Morrinsville. Still, no doubt there’s an art to wrapping the fish, a culture among the fishing fraternity, and each fish must have a heritage.
She is also the minister for child poverty reduction. I went to the page to see what this meant and found it vacant, just like the minister.

Winston Peters is the minister for foreign affairs.

Having an affair with the left-wing is certainly foreign to most of us here.
He is also the minister of state-owned enterprises and so far he has backtracked on most of the enterprising ideas he wanted to implement for the state. Maori seats and regional development to name just two. Winston is also the minister for racing. He has backed the wrong horse this time as he went left jumping out of the starting gates and is still galloping in the wrong direction.

Kelvin ‘has favourites’ Davis

Kelvin Davis is the minister for crown/Iwi relations.

Information provided says administrative support for this portfolio is provided by the ministry of justice. On his performance so far he’ll need plenty of it.
He is also the Minister of Corrections. This is a good fit. A lot of his corrections come in question time. The announcement that he doesn’t want to see violent crims locked up will see him being corrected yet again.

He is also the minister of tourism. As he is part of a government that doesn’t want fossil fuels in this country he’ll no doubt put a ban on airlines flying here so tourism won’t exist.

– TVNZ

Grant Robertson is the minister of finance.

Grant is yet to learn that in this portfolio you need a basic understanding of numbers. Grant, it appears, not being good with figures, hasn’t quite figured that out. If he manages to balance the budget it will probably have been achieved on the basis that he thinks one and one makes three.

He is also the minister of sport and recreation. Looking at him it would appear he is not a good fit for the sports portfolio. Recreation, however, is a strong point. Based on his performance so far he obviously spent the last nine years in recreation mode.

Phil Twyford is the minister of housing and urban development.

He is a tool or perhaps a spade as he’s always digging holes for himself. Not one house or double garage on any urban development so far. He hammered away at it in opposition but has no idea how to nail it in government. Went to the info page for this portfolio and it was blank. Perhaps this explains his inept performance so far.

He is also the minister of transport and is driving dumb policy that’s going nowhere just like Auckland traffic. It won’t be long before he has the whole country as stalled as his thinking appears to be. His idea of a tram up Dominion Road is completely off the rails.

Chris Hipkins

Chris Hipkins is the minister of education and he needs to get one. He wouldn’t look out of place back at school. He needs to crawl out from under Mummy’s union skirts and start acting like the person he’s supposed to be.
As the minister of state services, everything he services is in an appalling state.
He is also the leader of the house which is a total joke as he couldn’t lead a horse to water, never mind trying to make it drink. Organising a drinks party in a brewery would be beyond him as a leader.

 


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A guest post submitted to Whaleoil and edited by Whaleoil staff.

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