Beards of Whaleoil

Beards of Whaleoil

When I was seven, I ran into a wall at the side of the school playground and ended up with two vertical white scars beneath my nostrils. This was grown as soon as I was able because, without it, I look like the prototype for Gareth Morgan. I did have a full beard a long time ago but that went in 1980 because it gave me an uncomfortable similarity to Peter Sutcliffe (the Yorkshire Ripper.)

If you wish to contribute to Beards of Whaleoil then please do.

Any form of facial hair is considered and you can be as expressive as you wish.

We accept and applaud all forms of Beard; Mustache; Goatee, or any Bum Fluff at all for that matter, throughout the ages and to the present day.

Please send photos to sb at and put ‘beard’ in the subject line.

Please include a few sentences with your submission.

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