Seal clubbing resumes as Kiwibuild turns into KiwiKennel

Seal clubbing resumed in parliament yesterday as Judith Collins hammered the increasingly inept Phil Twyford over key details of Kiwibuild.

Meanwhile it turns out that the Kiwibuild plans are actually for KiwiKennels and banks won’t lend on them: Quote:

Inquiries from 1 NEWS have led to some KiwiBuild apartments being redesigned because they’re too small for banks to lend on.

The 25 apartments announced last week at the 340 Onehunga development in Auckland are to be the first KiwiBuild apartments sold off the plans.

However, the six $380,000 KiwiBuild studio apartments were just 39.2sqm in size.

That’s below the minimum 40sqm that major banks insist upon for buyers with KiwiBuild sized deposits.  End quote

No bigger than a garage. Or a nice dog kennel.Quote:

After 1 NEWS made inquiries into the matter, the developer scrambled last night and adjusted the floor plans of the studio apartments.

The developer now says the apartments will meet the 40sqm criteria.  End quote

Still a Kiwikennel. Quote:

Housing Minister Phil Twyford told 1 NEWS today the incident is “no big deal”.

“No look, it’s no big deal, it’s a very, very, small difference in the floor area, actually the apartments now are going to be slightly bigger,” Mr Twyford says.  End quote

A slightly bigger KiwiKennel, well Done Phil.Quote:

Loanmarket Director and mortgage broker Bruce Patten can’t understand how it happened.

“The minimum size that a lender will lend money on an apartment has been 40sqm for some time.

It’s interesting they make these assumptions without approaching the people who are going to be funding it,” Mr Patten says.  End quote

Phil knows best.Quote:

National MP Judith Collins says Mr Twyford should be embarrassed for not getting the details right.

“This is a blunder alright, but then most of what KiwiBuild has been, has been a bit of a blunder,” Ms Collins says.

1 NEWS understands the plans for the six studio apartments are now being revised. End quote.

Something the size of a garage is not a home. It is a joke to call it a home. Then again, Phil Twyford is the epitome of self parody and a walking, talking joke.


Do you want:

  • Ad-free access?
  • Access to our very popular daily crossword?
  • Access to daily sudoku?
  • Access to Incite Politics magazine articles?
  • Access to podcasts?
  • Access to political polls?

Our subscribers’ financial support is the reason why we have been able to offer our latest service; Audio blogs. 

Click Here  to support us and watch the number of services grow.

As much at home writing editorials as being the subject of them, Cam has won awards, including the Canon Media Award for his work on the Len Brown/Bevan Chuang story. When he’s not creating the news, he tends to be in it, with protagonists using the courts, media and social media to deliver financial as well as death threats.

They say that news is something that someone, somewhere, wants kept quiet. Cam Slater doesn’t do quiet and, as a result, he is a polarising, controversial but highly effective journalist who takes no prisoners.

He is fearless in his pursuit of a story.

Love him or loathe him, you can’t ignore him.

To read Cam’s previous articles click on his name in blue.

Listen to this post:
Voiced by Amazon Polly
33%