Mahuta is as important as a Samoan who can drive a boat!

Glory be to New Zealand! One of our most precious scribble-face Women of Colour has been venerated with the most prestigious of all awards, the BBC 100 Women award for, well, umm, being a trougher and having a tattoo apparently.

Don’t look so angry Nanaia. Honestly, we all think you’re very important.

Quote.

53) Nanaia Mahuta, 48 – Minister of Maori development, New Zealand.

Nanaia has served in the New Zealand parliament for 22 years and was the first female parliamentarian to wear a Maori face tattoo. end quote.

Well done Ms Mahuta. You are now as famous and as important as all these other award winners. Like this 19-year-old student who wants to go to space. quote.

8) Alina Anisimova, 19 – Student programmer, Kyrgyzstan.

Alina leads the Kyrgyz Girls’ Space School, which aims to send the country’s first satellite into space. end quote.

Or this older lady who may or may not wet her undies at times. Quote.

11) Judith Balcazar, 65 – Retired fashion designer, UK.

Judith ran several fashion companies before going on to co-found the company Giggle Knickers, which makes special underwear for women who suffer from urinary incontinence. end quote.

Or how about this lovely Samoan woman who can, umm, drive a boat? quote.

15) Fealofani Bruun, 35 – Yachtmaster, Samoa.

Fealofani is the first Samoan and the first Pacific woman to hold the position of yachtmaster, and looks after a traditional voyaging canoe. end quote.

But of course, we can’t go past this woman who once played a woman in a play. quote.

26) Noma Dumezweni, 49 – Actor, eSwatini (formerly known as Swaziland).

Noma is the first woman to play the adult version of Hermione Granger in Harry Potter and The Cursed Child, playing in London’s West End and Broadway, New York. end quote.

Then there is this woman who can prove, yes that’s right, prove, that women are as popular as men on social media, and can play ice hockey too! Quote.

38) Randi Heesoo Griffin, 30 – Olympic hockey player and data scientist, US.

Randi challenged critics of equal pay for women in ice hockey, using data that proved they were as popular on social media as the men. She also scored the first goal for the United Korea Olympic team at the 2018 Games. end quote.

The great brown goddess Mahuta is also just as important as young Thando, famously important for taking her clothes off it seems. quote.

41) Thando Hopa, 29 – Model, lawyer, activist, South Africa.

Thando is a diversity and inclusion advocate. Cast in the Pirelli calendar 2018, she is the first person of colour in South Africa to have featured in the publication. end quote.

Then there is Ruth, who can weld stuff. That’s easily as important as Nanaia. quote.

58) Ruth Medufia, 27 – Metal worker, Ghana.

Ruth is a female welder who lives in an urban slum community and aspires to be a role model for young women in the construction industry. end quote.

And don’t forget wee Dima the clown who can both collect and reflect tales from Syria! quote.

65) Dima Nashawi, 38 – Artist, Syria.

Dima is an artist, clown and visual storyteller, who collects and reflects tales from Syria. end quote.

Possibly the most important of all is Kelly O’Dwyer, who was the first person to ever give birth. (Sorry Cindy, you just couldn’t cut it) Quote.

67) Kelly O’Dwyer, 41 – Member of Parliament, Australia.

Kelly serves as the minister for jobs and industrial relations, and minister for women in the Australian parliament, and is the first female Australian cabinet minister to give birth whilst serving in office. end quote.

Then there is the woman who can hold her breath really well. quote.

30) Raghda Ezzeldin, 26 – Free-diver, Egypt.

Raghda is a record-breaking free-diver, who descends to extreme depths without breathing apparatus. End quote.

The Nanaiapotamus in the wild, also good at breath holding apparently. Credit: Luke

But what about the gardeners I hear you cry! Fear not, this one got the prize for making nice feeling gardens. quote.

80) Juliet Sargeant, 53 – Garden designer, Tanzania.

Juliet is a doctor-turned-garden designer working to make “places that feel as good as they look”. end quote.

Then, of course, there is this very important mother who is at least as important as The Mahuta because someone took a photo of her that went ‘viral’. Quote.

81) Sima Sarkar, 44 – Full-time mother, Bangladesh.

Sima needed to carry her 18-year-old disabled son to an examination and the photo went viral on social media. End quote.

We also must not forget that some women are important because their parents tried unsuccessfully to blow them up. Hmm, I wonder if Haven Shepherd is her birth name? Quote.

83) Haven Shepherd, 15 – Student and swimmer, Vietnam.

Haven is a Paralympic hopeful, having survived a suicide bomb set off by her parents. End quote.

In the women of the world segment, important people include this lovely old lady from Japan who has decided to learn to speak Engrish. Quote.

89) Setsuko Takamizawa, 90 – Retired, Japan.

Setsuko is learning English to help guide tourists who will visit Tokyo for the city’s 2020 Olympics. End quote.

Then we must acknowledge this nice lady from China, who seems to run some sort of Chinese sex toy site. Quote.

100) Jing Zhao, 35 – Entrepreneur, China.

Jing runs an online network that helps women to learn and discuss their bodies and sexual desires, and also promotes intimate products to help women enjoy sex more. end quote.

But honestly, this one is my favourite. A woman who is one of the most important people in the world, because she’s never done it, and has no intention of ever doing it! Quote.

40) Jessica Hayes, 41 – Teacher, US.

Jessica is a consecrated virgin – vowing perpetual virginity as a bride of Christ – who teaches high-school theology classes and serves as a vocational adviser. End quote.

So there you go Nanaia. You are super important, as important as a Samoan boat driver and a virgin theology teacher.

You go girl!


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ExPFC, ex lots of things. Husband to a great woman. Father to great kids. Traveller, teller of tall tales, wannabe capitalist property magnate. I’m a passionate user of fossil fuels, a proud Kiwi, Ford over Holden, Indy over F1, V8’s over everything else.

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