Bob Harvey Bob Harvey

I'd like to report a burglary

A woman has been reported as ringing the police to complain about a burglary.

So what!, you say, well read on.
[quote]The 45-year-old woman rang police yesterday morning to report the overnight theft of three cannabis plants she had been growing at her home.

The woman became so upset during the call she broke down in tears. Senior Sergeant Mal Lochrie said the police communications officer who took the call found it difficult to stop smiling as the women gave details of the theft over the phone.

"I have had three marijuana plants stolen. They were in buckets," the woman told the officer.

She also bemoaned the fact it was the fourth year in a row someone had sneaked on to her Ahuriri property at night to steal cannabis plants from her shed.

"I am a good person. I am sick of these low-lifes stealing my things," she told the communications officer. [/quote]

I am no lawyer but I think she does have a legitimate complaint, it was her property and it was stolen…of course she is open to prosecuton herself, but I wonder is it still burglary?

The rules of home/shop invasion

These are the rules to go by if threatened in your home or workplace by machete weilding morons.

Rule 1 – Use overwhelming force. If the offender uses a baseball bat you use a gun, if the offender uses a knife you use a gun, if the offender uses a machete you still use a gun, and if the offender has a gun then use a bigger, better gun and shoot straight and first.

Rule 2 – Shoot the idiot and then shoot the ceiling, in that order.

Rule 3 – Make sure the offender is dead. My cousin who was once a police man said to me that this rule is very important otherwise the police get to hear the offenders side of the story. It is very important that only one story gets told. If you don't then you get this sort of crap.

[quote]"We're waiting for advice from the medical experts as to when we can do that," he said. "Over the next few days we should be able to speak to him and get his side of the story."[/quote]

Rule 4 – Always say you fired a warning shot (see Rule 2) then use these words. "I was in fear of my life, officer" 

Rule 5 – Never change your story.