Brendan Burns

Why Labour will hurt and they don’t know it yet

On the surface Labour’s lowest ever result since 1928 is bad but manageable.

However if you look beyond the headline numbers and into the electorates you can see the terrible legacy Phil Goff has gifted the Labour party.

The recent result in Waitakere has only compounded the issue.

In a number of seats Labour have lost their local list MP for good. Take Rotorua, for instance, Todd McClay saw off Steve Chadwick for the?second?and last?time. Labour’s poor showing in the?party?vote means Steve Chadwick is now handing in her gear and looking for a job. She won’t have an office and neither will labour in Rotorua for three years. In the local press they won;t have to go and seek comment on issues from the local Labour person because they simply don’t exist. For the next three years the only MP commenting on local issues in Rotorua will be Todd McClay.

Napier is the same. Stuart Nash ran a robust campaign and really pushed Chris Tremain. However Tremain prevailed and Labour’s poor party vote now sees Stuart Nash seeking a job as Chief of Staff in Wellington to David Shearer. He won’t be back. Labour loses a spokesperson in the Bay and an office and Chris Tremain will now enjoy unfettered press coverage for three years straight. His majority will bounce back like Craig Foss who enjoyed a similar holiday from a Labour?list?stalker. Julia Haydon-Carr faced an insurmountable challenge of overcoming the man with the gay ute, Craig Foss, who did not have Julia stalking him for three years like Nash stalked Tremain.

Paula Bennett has now seen off Carmel Sepuloni in Waitakere. Labour loses an office and a list MP who can dog her every move in Waitakere. Labour again through its poor party vote loses exposure, resources and personnel and cedes the argument to National in a key electorate.

In Christchurch Central, Nicky Wagner will likewise enjoy having no Labour list MP dogging her as Brendan Burns at number 29 on Labour’s list was left stranded high and dry. Nicky will now be able to cement her position as National’s voice in Christchurch, an island of blue in a sea of red. Labour loses their office and their voice which will have to be picked up and shared by others. Perhaps Clayton Cosgrove, after his defeat in Waimakiriri might establish a presence, but it will never be a full time one.

Sam Lotu Iiga in Maungakiekie also will enjoy not having Carol Beaumont stalk his every move. He will be hoping that no labour list MPs quit and that David Shearer will tell Beaumont that the face doesn’t fit but until then he too can enjoy an electorate without a Labour office ruining the view.

Losing those resources in key areas makes it very difficult to turn things around in 2014. Labour has less presence, less resources and they must spread thinly to ensure coverage. They don’t realise the significance yet of their decision to keep Goff at the helm so that he could do to Labour what Bill English did to national in 2002. Even the leaders office will suffer cutbacks due to the reduced vote. Some in the Goffice will be very nervous, not just because they were wedded to the disaster that was Phil Goff but because there simply isn’t enough cash now to retain them all.

This is the mess that Labour has inherited, but worse this is the mess they have charged a political novice with fixing. Does David Shearer have an Orewa speech in him? I don’t think so.

Fresh? Ctd

The so-called ‘fresh face‘ looks like a bit of a rehash. Three out of Four who have been elected to date are former staffers in the Clark administration.

  • David Shearer ? former staffer in Goff’s office under the Clark administration
  • Grant Robertson ? former staffer in Clark’s office
  • Chris Hipkins ? former staffer

Beyond that there are at least another three who have worked as staffers in Parliament. If Jacinda is elevated to front bench then might it suggest there is a new faction in the Labour Party. A powerful, former Clark admin staffer faction.

  • Jacinda Ardern ? former Clark staffer
  • Moana Mackey ? former Executive Secretary
  • Kris Fa’afoi ? Goff staffer

Of course Brendan Burns put a spanner in the works by losing…. not that Shearer could remember his name.

If Stuart Nash is serious about re-entering parliament then he should be applying for the now vacant Chief of Staff job, that way he’ll be on an easier and faster track to get back into Parliament in a nice cosy safe Labour seat.

Where is the message discipline?

Brendan Burns totally disagrees with Trevor Mallard on the stadium for Christchurch.

Across the car park, the welcome announcement that Rugby League Park will be turned into a temporary home for the Crusaders and other matches, with Government underwriting the $20m cost of the 17,000 seat facility. If there is one sporting symbol for Canterbury?s revival that?s important to our region?s psyche, it is to host Crusaders games again.
It remain unfathomable as to why Trevor Mallard came out and dumped all over the people op Christchurch.

No wonder Lord Burns doesn’t like me

He is pissed off because I have given him a down-grade.

Instead of me calling him Lord Burns of Marlborough he’d instead prefer something a little more prestigious:

In an interview with?The Press, he said ?I quite like being called the Duke of Marlborough? after his stint as the editor of?The Marlborough Express.

No wonder he is mad,?Dukes are four ranks above Lords.

How would Brendan Burns know?

Lord Burns of Marlborough is a man of many talents. Apart from his highly successful time in running Labour?s slick media machine he is an award winning editor and producer of high class wine.

He has deigned to remove himself from his country seat to help the lumpenproletariat of the Socialist Republic remove the oppressive yoke of Tory government. In doing so he has become the spokesperson for Labour about the future state of Christchurch, based on his holding the seat of Christchurch Central.

A list of 40 historic buildings that should be saved was drawn up after the February quake, but following the June aftershock and the speed of demolition accelerating; only 15 from the list look likely to remain.

Christchurch central MP Brendan Burns said the city will turn into a “shadow of its former self”, if more of the buildings are not saved.

Typical of chardonnay socialist’s like Lord Burns wanting to protect something that could possibly kill people, will cost many times more to keep than to rebuild, and will delay the rebuild of Christchurch. This approach will prevent people from holding down jobs or living in the Central City. That is just fine with Lord Burns, provided he keeps winning the approval of the other chardonnay socialists who think ugly old bricks and mortar make a city, rather than the esprit de corp of the people ? even if the people are lumpenproletariat and do not understand esprit de corp. And probably wouldn?t be able to find it even if they were given a thorough wash.

Another "One"

Brendan BurnsYou are a former media man who ran Helen’s media unit, where your searing intellect and sharp wit was sadly misinterpreted by the sots in the press gallery who gave you the slightly unbecoming nickname ?Lord Burns?.

Being neither one of the gaggle nor a self serving unionist you took two for the team, running in the very blue seat of Kaikoura with no hope of winning a list place, despite being the award winning editor of the local rag and your chateaux being right in the heart of the electorate.

Chardonnay may have been grown in plentiful supplies, but the socialist part did not follow, with the good burghers of Marlborough rejecting your immense intellectual advantage to favour a man whose only real claim to fame was he was a world class shearer. As if shearers know how to change the world. They are known to be all smelly and wear bad clothes and drink and cuss and not really be worthy of your scintillating conversation and are probably proud to be Lumpenproletaria.

With the blessing of Helen you were transplanted from your country seat to the Socialist Republic of Christchurch, where you managed to win a rigged selection to become the carpet bagging MP for Christchurch Central. ?You subsequently added the name of your country seat to your title, becoming widely recognised as Lord Burns of Marlborough.

Your narrow win in a very safe seat mean’t you eroded a massive majority to 935 when the proles again failed to recognise the important impact your intellect would make on the world if they would only trouble themselves to think about it.

On recent polling your seat is nominally a National seat as it requires less than a 3% swing for you to be sent back to the Chateaux to brood over how the lumpen can be taken out of the Lumpenproletaria. The current additional 15% in favour of National is more than five times the necessary swing for you to lose your seat, and if that happens you require Labour to win 32% of the vote to ensure parliament does not become a lesser place due to losing your intellect.

So you talk to your good Lady wife, who has become quite accustomed your new found importance and her new found clothing allowance, and wonder if you should preserve your career by say ?Phil my dear old thing, perhaps you should pass the baton on to another chap for the good of the party, and of course New Zealand.?

You become another ?one?.


A solution for Fossy's gay ute

By now everyone knows that Craig Foss has a gay ute.

Ever the helpful blogger I think I have a solution for Craig Foss so he can man up.

Hopefully he will be able to find the money to buy Sandra Goudie’s non-gay V8 Ford Falcon 500 now she is retiring and save Hastings from being?embarrassed?by an MP with a gay ute.

Sandra Goudie's V8 Ford Falcon 500

Sandra Goudie's manly V8 Ford Falcon 500

Still, at least it isn’t as gay as Lord Burns? of Marlborough?s love bug.

Gayer that Fossy's gay ute

This is wrong. Male mps are not supposed to have a love bug as a car and two doors makes it difficult getting in behind the driver when Lord Burns descends from his country seat in Marlborough.

It certainly is gayer than Fossy’s gay ute. It could have been worse, I suppose, it could have been an even?gayer Toyota Prius.

Brendan Burn's gay VW Beetle

Gayer than Craig Foss's gay ute?


17 MP Defectors…Was Chris Carter not a liar after all Mr Goff?

Not too long ago Chris Carter stated that he had the names of 17 MP?s that were willing to vote against Phil Goff and his leadership. The?Labour Leaders called him a liar and that there was no substance to his claims at all.

But it seems that he wasn?t lying at all.

Last night in the House an extraordinary event took place. What was it? The revelation that 17, that is right the same number as Chris Carter used, voted contrary (or not at all) to the way the remaining in Labour voted on the Rugby World Cup (Empowerment) Bill. National?revealed the names in Parliament today.

What is interesting is the list of seventeen. Who are some of 17 defectors?

None other than:

  • Brendan Burns
  • Trevor Mallard
  • Ruth Dyson
  • Ross Robertson
  • David Shearer
  • Charles Chauvel
  • Damian O?Connor
  • Maryan Street
  • Nania Mahuta
  • Shane Jones
  • Lianne Daizel
  • Su?a William Sio
  • George Hawkins
  • Clayton Cosgrove
  • Lynne Pillay

What is even more interesting though is the fact that despite the rules stating that in the event of split party vote, the said party must IMMEDIATELY present a list of the names of each voter. It took Labour over two hours to do this, and when they did present it they tried to say that they had allowed a conscience vote on the issue as they were a ?party that allowed democracy?. But this was a split vote on a ?Closure Motion?

Phil Goff and the Labour party are grasping at straws now.

So, is Chris Carter is not a liar after all Mr Goff?

You gotta hope Brendon Burns is in Labour?s strategy team

Lord Burns of Malborough is talking out his arse.

At a Labour meeting over the weekend, a member raised a question about whether Winston was going to stand.? I said, without a doubt and then ventured this thought about where. Epsom.

The Labour folk instantly understood the power of this. It would give Winston a chance to go head-to-head with another party leader. The media would love it. It is an Auckland seat making it easy for television to cover. The good people of Epsom may not be so enamoured with Mr Hide, now his Perkbuster mantle has fallen?And if Winston did manage to take out Rodney (yes it is the most affluent seat in the country but? the Alliance once nearly won Tamaki..), then he damages, perhaps fatally, the National/ACT coalition. Ah, sweet revenge?

The man is congenitally stupid. Rodnbey would like nothing better to than for Winston Raymond Peters, 65, unemployed of St Mary’s Bay.

The voters of Epsom are far smarter than Labour and/or Lord Burns of Marlborough.