Ford Ranger Wildtrak

Is this Fossy’s next gay ute?

A concerned reader emails:

Gay ute, Ford Ranger

Is this Fossy’s next gay ute?

Cam, the Sydney Morning Herald has written about the new gay ute from Ford.

The issue is that they like the New Ford Ranger Wildtrak, and think Hugh Jackman would be a likely celebrity owner….it’s sickening Cam, not a good way to start 2013.

Please make sure Fossy doesn’t see this.

A concerned reader.

Yes this is certainly very concerning. I understand that Fossy is indeed looking for a new gay ute, his old gay one, that was seen off road the other day when it had to avoid a car park puddle at Napier airport, has been barely used, ever since he scored the Crown BMW limo with his ministers job. Read more »

Just when you thought it was safe to hit the roads again

I would never have thought that Ford could make a gayer ute than their current gay ute, but they have really excelled themselves this time.

Ford have announced that they have really camped up the gay ute and made and even gayer one.

Let me re-write their information for them:

Ford NZ is going gay at this year’s Fieldays show with the much-anticipated New Zealand debut of the new Ranger Wildtrak gay ute.

Designed and developed in Australia the Wildtrak sits on gayed out 18-inch wheels and comes with a roof rack and gay sports hoop to beefcake up its profile. There is also special badging and gay graphics to set it apart from lesser models. Inside, there are leather/cloth sports seats and 23 different storage spaces including a glovebox which can fit a laptop computer and a deep centre bin which can keep six cans of mineral water cool.

Apparently, the Wildtrak can mince through water up to 31.5-inches deep and has just over nine inches of ground clearance. It also has a towing capability of up to 3350kg.

In terms of powerplants the Wildtrak has an option of two engines. A new weak pussy -ass 2.2-litre four-cylinder diesel that delivers peak torque output of 375 Nm and power output of 110kW, or a new metro-sexual 3.2-litre 5-cylinder diesel that produces a powerful 470 Nm of torque and is power rated at 147kW. The Wildtrak is fitted with an 80-litre fuel tank so expect one of the longest ranges in the segment.

Alongside the new Ranger Wildtrak on Ford’s show stand will be the new Territory Titanium, the metro-sexual gay ute of the city folk, new Mondeo Titanium, new AB Falcon XR6 and the current model Ranger. Ford is also pushing its connection with the All Blacks and will have two All Blacks players on-site on Friday the 17th of June from 1-3pm for photos with the fans.

Maybe the Hon. Craig Foss will get an even gayer ute to celebrate his new ministerial post.