Oh dear lord, a second newspaper editorial I agree with

A newspaper editorial today discusses knighthoods and how apart from bitter socialists like Brian Rudman most Kiwis kind of like knighthoods.

New Zealanders and Australians have much in common, but not everything. Our respective attitude to knighthoods is one area we, in general, differ. While New Zealanders can hardly wait to see titles bestowed on their homecoming All Black captain and coach today, Australia has just abandoned the practice – again.

Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull has announced its royal honours, abolished long ago but reinstated by Tony Abbott last year, will not be continued.

In this country, the Prime Minister has practically promised Richie McCaw a knighthood and the Labour Party, which abolished them when last in government, endorses the offer. Its deputy leader, Annette King, yesterday said the party had not reviewed its policy on royal honours since they were restored by National in 2009 but she saw no appetite in this country for “chopping and changing” the system.

She is right. When Helen Clark abolished the titles in 2000, she did so without much public discussion and not all in her party were comfortable with it. Her deputy, now Sir Michael Cullen, thought it a mistake. The country missed them during those nine years.

Without a few titles conferred, the annual New Year’s and Queen’s Birthday honours lost much of their focus and public interest. Their reinstatement was well received.

Read more »

Congrats Dad

Yesterday we went to Government House in Auckland for Dad’s investiture ceremony.

He was awarded the ONZM in the New Years Honours List.

My brother flew in from Dubai, and close friends and family were in?attendance. Sadly Mum couldn’t be there but she knew Dad had been honoured when she was told the weekend before she died. A special exception was made to tell her.

I’m very proud of my Dad and all the volunteer work he has done for the community over the year.? Read more »


Rudman on Cullen

? NZ Herald

Brian Rudman thinks Michael Cullen is a class traitor…well he doesn’t say it quite like that but he sure as hell means it. On the plus side he isn’t moaning about his liberal elite theatre that he wants everyone else to pay for:

There’s plenty of us with no Irish blood who find both the restoration of knighthoods under the present Government, and now Dr Cullen’s acceptance of one, a step backwards into Nostalgialand.

For Dr Cullen, it’s also a two-fingered salute to his former leader, Helen Clark, and his Cabinet colleagues who together ushered in a 21st century honours system which, for a short while at least, did away with the old imperial mumbo-jumbo.

After the restoration back in 2009, the unseemly rush of 70 or more old judges and politicians and businessmen to replace their non-titled honours – awarded under the Clark Government – with a mass-produced Knighthood or Dameship was crass and risible enough, I had hoped, to devalue the system beyond repair. Silly me. The lust to lord it over others and have the title to rub it in runs deep in some.

Sir Michael now says he would like to see some consensus about an honours system that was more specific to New Zealand but has no ideas how that could be achieved. Now that he has scored his gong, that is. If he’s serious in his quest for a more indigenous honours system, doesn’t he recall there was a home-grown non-titular system in place until 2009 which he helped usher in?

Tom Scott on the QB Honours

? Stuff.co.nz


Fred Goodwin has joined Robert Mugabe in being stripped of his knighthood:

Former RBS chief Fred Goodwin joins the likes of Robert Mugabe, Anthony Blunt and Nicolae Ceausescu in losing his knighthood.

Since 1995, the honours forfeiture committee has recommended that 34 people be stripped of their honours.

Other similarly stripped of their knighthoods or honours are?Allen Stanford, Anthony Blunt, Lester Piggott, Prince Naseem and Roger Casement.

Shane Jones has suggested that Michael Fay be likewise stripped of his knighthood.

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Random Rude Questions

So letters of support from democratic leaders around the world count for nothing but a letter from the chairman of the church organ committee gets you an award?

A lifetime of volunteer service for your country counts for nothing but troughing it up for your pension scheme and passing laws that benefit your share portfolio gets an award?

Representing New Zealand on the international stage counts for nothing but mad incoherent rants for money gets an award?

Working for 50 years for an organisation in a volunteer capacity counts for nothing but playing 6 games for the All Blacks and losing a series to South Africa 60 years ago gets you an award?

Helping a PM get into parliament counts for nothing but giving away your family’s old money out of guilt gets you an award?

Helping build bridges between democratic nations worldwide counts for nothing but working in your chosen profession for a whole heap of hooter gets you an awards?

Is Simon Power (FIGJAM) just a fuckwit?

Is Karori Bill English just a vindictive hayseed?

Excuse? me if I just don’t throw up with the paucity of excellence and proliferation of a mediocrity that will be shown in tomorrow’s Quuens Birthday Honours List.

They aren’t honours they are dis-honours, and National are dis-honourable in disrespecting one of the best and most loyal.


Random Impertinent Leaks

I predict that this years Queens Birthday Honours will be a joke. I thought it wasn’t possible for the honours system to be made more of a laughing stoke than what Labour did to it but National has really excelled themselves with the Queens Birthday Honours. There seems to be an over representation of Maori and people getting awards for simply doing their job.

Awards this year include:
For services to Maori bribe?
For services to rugby pathetic, an award for playing rugby
For services to film
For services to poetry mad ramblings more like
For services to ophthalmology, music and the community
For services to Maori art and Maori bribe?
For services to equestrian sport
For services to architecture
For services to the Earthquake Commission paid for job
For services to the Pacific Islands community
For services to photography
For services to fashion and the community
For services to volleyball
For services to Maori bribe?
For services to marching FFS
For services to yachting
For services to music
For services to organ restoration good grief
For services to traditional Indian dance
For services to the Pacific Islands community and the community
For services to Maori and the community
For services to journalism repeating
For services to herpetology
For services to entertainment
For services to Maori and the arts bribe?
For services as a Judge
For services to women’s health
For services to the restoration of historic places
For services to Maori language education bribe?
For services to museums
For services to the Pacific Islands community
For services to social policy
For services to the judiciary
For services to the library profession
For services to asthma and respiratory care
For services to the Indian community
For services to typography
For services to Maori bribe?
For services to Maori? bribe?
For services to the Pacific Islands community
For services to wildlife
For services to Maori and the community
For services to the Chinese community
For services to the Pacific Islands community
For services to the Indian community
For services to radio
For services to shearing
For services to historic places
For services to the deepsea fishing industry
For services to the Pacific Islands community


How to get an ONZ – 101

I have had a few emails from deluded folks about my comments on Helen Clark making the Order of New Zealand. I thought I would reply to them all via a blog post.

Would Whaleoil join a club with the following members?

  • Whetu Tirkatene-Sullivan
  • Jim Bolger
  • Ken Douglas
  • Mike Moore
  • Jonathan Hunt
  • Paul Reeves
  • Owen Woodhouse
  • Cath Tizard
  • Lloyd Geering

Not bloody likely, pinkos the lot of them, I wouldn’t share my spit with them let alone have a cozy once a year dinner at Government house, which seems to be the only benefit of the silly thing. That might be something Farrar aspires to but certainly not me.

One other thing. Would the Lame Stream media repeaters stop repeating the lie that there are only ever 20 living members of the order. Right now there are 23 and that is EXCLUDING Clark. She makes it 24. She should have had to wait until there was a space.

However if you really do want to have a chance at being an ONZ or at the very least guarantee you will never be prosecuted you can buy access here.

Just wait till I tell the cops on Tuesday that I joined the Labour Party.


The Whale Oil Beef Hooked Honours List

Sir Tony “Wardrobe” Ryall – (WOBH Politician of the Year) For services to New Zealand. Cutting the health bureaucracy by $500m is a bloody good start. Keep swinging the axe Tony and we should see you through to the House of Lords.

Silly Old Dame Sue Bradford – For services to New Zealand, particularly leaving politics. Hope she does join Len Brown and his Band of Merry Meddlers for next years local body elections.

Sir Crusher Collins – (I defy anyone to call Crusher a Dame to her face) For services to New Zealand, especially for muscling up to scumbags and not worrying about the f**king liberal elite who go on about the poor souls that have suffered under an oppressive society, colonialism or other silly progressive excuse du jour. Would have won Politician of the Year if she had actually gotten a car crushed before today.

Sir Kevin Brady – For services to New Zealand, particularly honesty in trying to hold a corrupt government to account in the dying days of the Clark Regime.

Sir Trevor “Tiger” Mallard – For servicing lonely women all over New Zealand for decades

Sir Winston Raymond Peters – For complete shamelessness, and on the proviso he runs in 2011. Please Winston the country needs you.

The Loretta Award for being a splitter on the left – Chris Trotter, it is expected that he will win this most of the time, but there has to be a rookie somewhere in the ranks of the left. Anyone? Anyone?

The “Karori” Bill English Award for monumental electoral fuck ups – John Key. Although his poll ratings are sky high the appointment of Helen Clark to the Order of new Zealand is a step too far.

The Andrew Williams Award: Inconsistency and Incompetence in local government – Andrew Williams, there is no other eligible for this award, it may even become a lifetime achievement award.

The Michael Laws Award: Telling the unvarnished, unpalatable truth to the liberal elite – Joint holders Judith “Crusher” Collins and Michael Laws.

The Tiger Woods Award: for exceptional ability with multiple partners: Two awards in this category for 2009, Trevor “Tiger” Mallard and Stuart “Mangrove” Nash. Your exploits have not gone un-noticed.

The Fred Astaire Award: for services to dancing – awarded to Darren “Private Dancer” Hughes.

The Santa Claus and Easter Bunny Award – David Cunliffe for his leadership aspirations.

The Big Ben Award: for services to Fast Food – Joint winners Shane “Five Chins” Jones and Parekura “Whopper” Horomia for stopping in at Burger King during a protest march.

The Isaac Newton Prize for Mathematics – Sir Roger “Yeltsin” Douglas, “Private” Heather Roy and John “Spanky” Boscawen for think that 3 from 5 is a majority.

Other suggestions please in the comments, perhaps we could make this an annual event with a function sometime around December 15.


Fuck you very much

That is what the Honours Committee has told New Zealand today.

They have said Fuck You Very Much, New Zealand.

Note down these names, they are the members of the Cabinet Appointments and Honours Committee, John “Smiling Assassin” Key (Chair), “Karori” Bill English, Gerry “Salad Dodger” Brownlee, Simon “FIGJAM” Power, Tony “Wardrobe” Ryall, Anne “Closer” Tolley, Christopher “Tinkerbell” Finlayson, David “Brown Envelope” Carter, Murray “Charlie Wilson” McCully, Hon Georgina te Heuheu “Grub”, Pansy “Ting Tong” Wong, “Private” Heather Roy, “Aunty” Tariana Turia, Peter “Rothmans” Dunne.

These are the people who think that someone who:

  • Didn?t just forge one painting, she admitted to signing ?about half a dozen? works of art which she hadn?t produced ?over 20 years? and then couldn?t understand what was wrong with that.
  • Didn?t support the police who drove too fast to get her from Waimate to Christchurch so she could make a Rugby game.
  • Used taxpayers? money illegally to pay for Labour?s campaigns, changed the law retrospectively to make that spending legal and passed an Act in an attempt to allow that spending to continue while restricting what other individuals and groups could spend.
  • Backed Phillip Field in the face of strong evidence against him and did her best to thwart the inquiry into his actions, and only cut him loose when he made the suggestion he might go independent.
  • Continued to back Winston Peters as a minister long after he showed he could not be trusted, right up to the election.
  • Presided over a government that lied in the PREFU covering up billions of dollars of exposure in ACC.
  • Denigrated many groups in New Zealand exercising their democratic right to freedom of speech. She would rather meet a sheep than “that group of haters and wreckers” and her constant attacks on the Exclusive Brethren were breathtaking examples of her own failure to adhere to the Bill of Rights.
  • Presiding of a government that despite at least 9 case of prima facie evidence being found the Police decided it wasn’t in the public interest to pursue against the Labour MPs but watched them charge and prosecute a National MP for driving a tractor.
  • Removed the Privy Council with a mandate as our highest court.

That person is Helen Clark and she has now been made an Member of Order of New Zealand. This appointment sickens me, it makes me feel dirty to belong to the National Party. This woman has more to destroy the New Zealand we knew than almost anyone else other than perhaps Muldoon and we nicknamed him “Piggy”.

I am disgusted, this is a step too far, supporting the evil witch into a cosy do nothing job at the United Nations was a step too far in my opinion but at least she was gone. Now we have a list that will have her name on it until the day she dies, which hopefully won’t be too far off.

The Order of New Zealand is restricted to just 20 living New Zealanders, the others on the list must be mortified that the beast is walking amongst them.